Fighting Dreamers
by smartcat
Summary: When life is full of lemons, Sasuke and Naruto decide to make yaoi...and fight crime on the side...and stumble on organized criminals...and try not to get killed while kicking ass in a truly, manly fashion. Police Fic. AU. SasuNaru
1. Welcome to the Precinct

**I've really been at it this week haven't I? This is the first time I'm writing something AU. I got this idea on the train when I was studying for my Anatomy Exam. Isn't that weird? I mean, what does this and Anatomy have in common? Proves to show how well I was studying :D**

**THIS FANFIC WILL CONTAIN YAOI (boyxboy) SO HERE'S YOUR WARNING. IF YOU DON'T LIKE, DON'T READ. DON'T SAY I DIDN'T WARN YOU...**

**Anyway, hope you guys enjoy this!**

**Disclaimer: Naruto isn't mine sadly *tear***

* * *

Chapter 1: Welcome to the Precinct

"Alright!" Naruto shouted, pumping his fist in the air, "Perfect shot!"

He chanced a glance at Iruka as he pulled his heavy ear mufflers off. The older cop was cradling both his ears with a pained expression on his face that slowly morphed into a complete and utter look of rage.

Naruto gulped as he lowered the gun.

Damn, he forgot to wait for Iruka to put on a pair of ear mufflers before taking his shot at the target.

"NARUTO!" Iruka bellowed, stepping towards the now trembling blond, "HOW MANY TIMES HAVE I TOLD YOU TO CHECK THE ROOM BEFORE TAKING SHOTS AT THE TARGET?"

Letting out a nervous laugh, Naruto scratched the back of his head subconsciously, "Uh…many times?"

Now standing in front of his student with a murderous expression on his face, Iruka held back the urge to wipe that silly grin off the younger man's face. The blond on the other hand, shrugged his shoulders before turning and pointing at the target he'd just shot.

Heaving a disgruntled sigh, Iruka gave up and lowered his hands from his ears.

They were still ringing. Cursing silently, he peered out at the shooting range. Naruto's target was hanging a couple of hundred yards away. With a quick movement of his hand, Iruka hit the large green button on his right, causing a large machine to slowly bring the target towards them.

When it was close enough, Iruka grabbed it, studying hard.

Naruto held his breath.

He was sure of it.

This time, he had definitely hit the bull's eye on his first try.

Trying to peer over his instructor's shoulder, Naruto tried to catch a glimpse of his target.

A dangerous growl emitting from one Iruka Umino told him that that was a _bad _idea.

With a laborious sigh, Naruto leaned back against the wall and took off his goggles, waiting as patiently as he could for Iruka to finish.

Honestly, he didn't know what was taking the guy so long. It didn't take _this_ much time to decipher whether or not someone hit the target. The bullet hole was either inside _or_ outside the red circle.

The police academy in Konoha sure was hell to get into.

Heck, it was even tougher on the guys that wanted 'in' on the special unit. He spent two years training for the regular task force and another extra two years just so he could get on board with the special unit.

All his friends were taking the examinations as well.

They were all determined to make it on the force this year. However, Naruto's reasons for joining the special unit ran far deeper than the average cops'.

When he was just a year old, his mother had died leaving him all alone with his father.

Minato Uzumaki had been the chief of police in Konoha.

Everybody loved him and looked up to him, including his still infant son. Minato was always at the precinct, working and trying his best to keep the city he loved safe.

That was how Naruto meet everyone at the K Precinct. _And_ it was also how Naruto met Sasuke Uchiha.

Fugaku Uchiha had been the warden of the large city prison, his wife Mikoto was Minato's secretary. She would sometimes bring her younger son to the precinct along with her. Their eldest son however, preferred to stay by his friends so Naruto never got a chance to meet the older Uchiha.

However, Sasuke…he saw plenty.

The first day they met was a day all the seasoned officers remembered as 'The Day of the Tods.'

Naruto and Sasuke had become rivals within an hour of their meeting.

The two boys would usually be seen arguing or competing over the most silliest of things. Sasuke would never admit it now, but he once got into a fight with Naruto over who got to walk inside the precinct first.

However, things took a turn for the worse a couple of weeks after Naruto's third birthday.

Minato had needed to drop Naruto off at Jiraiya's place for a couple of hours. The old seasoned crime veteran had been Minato's academy instructor before he became a cop.

The two of them were quite the pair. It even could be said their teacher-student relationship rivaled those of the most famous.

Jiraiya had even been named Naruto's godfather.

That night, Minato was going to bust a huge prostitution ring. Before leaving to go on the sting, Minato had ruffled Naruto's unruly hair and made the boy promise to be good and behave. Naruto had made a comment that he was always good and well behaved; that made the two older men laugh.

Before heading to his cruiser, Minato had placed a kiss on Naruto's forehead. Kneeling down before his son, Minato told him that he loved him and would come pick him up later that night. Naruto had jumped into his father's arms and hugged him tight.

That was the last time he ever saw his father alive.

Apparently, the head of the prostitution ring had put up a harder fight than the Chief of Police had ever expected.

His team of officers found themselves in a nasty predicament.

They were outnumbered and outgunned.

One of the officers had been shot and was leaning against a filing cabinet, bleeding heavily. By some miracle, Minato had gotten every officer out of the building that had been hosting the criminal enterprise. He even managed to cuff one of the higher ranked thugs. That night, he had returned to the station a happy man. Grabbing his keys, he drove down to Jiraiya's house to pick up his son. When he got there, the boy was already asleep. So as carefully as he could, Minato put his son in his car and drove home.

It was a quick drive from Jiraiya's house to his…barely even five minutes.

Minato parked his car in the driveway and got out. He had just gotten the passenger door open when he was shot in the chest from behind. Blood splattered into the car as Minato fell forwards.

Naruto, stirred in his sleep. His eyes opened slowly as a pair of hands grabbed him and lifted him out of the car roughly. The small boy tried to shout out but was unable to as a filthy hand clamped over his mouth. Struggling hard, Naruto tried to disentangle himself from his attacker's deadly embrace. His wriggling however, was literally cut short when the man pulled out a knife and sliced into the young boy's cheek. He made six cuts across the Naruto's face, three horizontal lines on each cheek.

Naruto cried out in pain. The sound muffled by the assailant's hand.

Just then, two police cruisers pulled up.

Apparently, with the last bit of his remaining strength, Minato had sent out a distress call that was answered by the officers closest to his location.

The assailants turned out to be some of the thugs hired by the prostitution ring.

They were caught…but that didn't bring Minato Uzumaki back.

The precinct had mourned the loss of their beloved chief for three weeks before finally asking Jiraiya to come back to the force and take up the position. The veteran cop declined but told them he knew someone who would be a great candidate for the job.

Thus, Tsunade was given the name Chief of Police.

Jiraiya had taken Naruto in and assumed the post of Deputy Chief (Tsunade wouldn't have agreed to become Chief if he didn't) and continued to write his drabble on the side.

"It's your lucky day," Iruka finally said, handing Naruto the target. The blond grabbed the rough paper out of his instructor's hands and looked it over. His eyes widened as his mouth stretched out into a wide grin.

"Hell yeah!"

Iruka smiled as he watched the boy jump around like a five-year-old.

_I have to stop worrying about the little brat_, he thought to himself, there was only so much he could do to keep Naruto out of danger. He trained him well, taught him everything he could. Now it was all up to him.

"Make sure you're at the precinct at eight, come Monday morning," Iruka said, "You're going to be assigned a partner and given your badge, so please, don't screw it up."

"Yeah, yeah," Naruto nodded, barely able to contain his excitement.

He couldn't wait to tell everyone! Already, he could see the look on Sasuke's face.

That bastard was going to see it clearly this time.

Naruto Uzumaki had just beaten that brooding jerk!

He rushed out of the shooting range as fast as he could while trying at the same time to pull his phone out of his pocket. Apparently, running and trying to get your cell out of your pocket was harder than it looked.

Finally pulling it out, he sent a mass text to every one of his friends.

_Party at Ichiraku tonight! Be there at eight!_

:::

Naruto grinned. He pulled his keys out of his blue Chevy truck and chuckled to himself. All but jumping out of the car, he ran up the seven steps leading to the precinct door and swung it open.

The place was as busy as usual.

As far as the eye could see, cops were walking in and out of offices.

Naruto saluted the picture of his dad hanging on the wall and proceeded down the hallway.

"Hey Naruto," Kotetsu waved as he saw the blond pass. The cop was hovering over his partner's desk as the other tried to finish writing a report for the case they solved the other day.

Izumo looked up from his paperwork as Naruto approached them. He smiled as Naruto plopped himself in the chair opposite his desk.

"Hey, what you up to?"

"Izumo's writing up his report on the Sadamu case," Kotetsu said with a sly smile.

"No," Izumo grit his teeth, "I'm writing up _your_ case report on the Sadamu case."

Kotetsu grinned and shrugged his shoulders while the other cop sighed.

_How in the world do I always get stuck doing all of Kotetsu's paperwork_, Izumo thought to himself as he grumbled.

"Haha, sucks to be you, Izumo," Naruto laughed.

Izumo grunted.

"So what brings you to the precinct?" He asked as he continued filling out Kotetsu's report.

"Guess," Naruto grinned.

Kotetsu rubbed his chin, "You get in another fight with Sasuke?"

"Nope."

"Sakura filed a restraining order against you?"

"Shut up, Izumo."

"Did you steal Kakashi's Icha Icha Paradise novel?"

"If I did, why the hell would I hide at the precinct?" Naruto furrowed his brow.

"What is it then?"

Naruto narrowed his eyes at the two officers, "Is it really that hard to figure out?" He grumbled, hands crossed over his chest.

Kotetsu and Izumo shared a look.

"It couldn't be…" Izumo put his pencil down.

"Was Iruka holding the examinations this week?" Kotetsu leaned over Izumo to look at the calendar hanging on the wall.

Naruto couldn't take it any longer, "Yes! Yes! I passed the examination! Honestly, you'd think you would have remembered it. I've been _talking_ about it for weeks!"

"We knew, we were just messing with you, squirt," Kotetsu grinned, ruffling Naruto's hair.

Izumo smiled and went back to filling out the report, "In all honesty, I don't think _anyone_ here could have forgotten."

Naruto jumped from his chair and slammed his palms on the desk, smiling like an idiot. "You bet! Come Monday, I'll be getting my badge and joining the ranks of the police force of Konoha!"

Just then, the phone rang on Izumo's desk. Without a moment's hesitation, Kotetsu picked it up earning himself a glare from the stationed Izumo.

"This is Captain Hagane speaking."

Kotetsu scribbled something on a scrap of paper lying on Izumo's desk as he nodded his head. Seeing that the two officers had work to do, Naruto waved goodbye at Izumo as the poor officer tried to finish the case report while Kotetsu occupied over half the desk space. On his way to Tsunade's office, he ran into Genma. In the traditional Genma fashion, the older cop had a single toothpick jutting out of his mouth.

Seeing Naruto, he grinned, "Hey kid, how was the examination?"

"I passed!"

"Up high!"

Slapping the other's palm, Naruto grinned back brightly. After exchanging pleasantries with his senior, the blond turned to go.

"I heard the good news."

Spinning around quickly, Naruto found himself looking up at Kakashi, his mask covering the smile plastered to his face.

"Yeah, who told you?" Naruto tried to hide the pleased expression on his face.

"Iruka," Kakashi said. He patted Naruto on the head, "Good Boy."

"I'm not a dog," Naruto grumbled.

"KAKASHI!" A female voice rang out.

The silver haired man sighed, "Gotta run. See ya."

Naruto watched as Kakashi bolted down the hallway and ran towards Izumo's desk. The blond shook his head sadly. Poor Izumo. First Kotetsu and now Kakashi.

He was never going to finish filling out that case report…

From the left side of the hall with one hand fisted around a rather large amount of paper came Shizune. Huffing and puffing as she ran past a bewildered Naruto.

Noticing him out of the corner of her eye, she instantly backpedaled."Hey, how'd it go?"

"I passed," Naruto buffed his nails against his orange hoodie as if it was nothing major. The smile on his face proved otherwise.

"That's great!" Shizune nodded her head in approval. "Now by any chance, did you see where Kakashi ran off to? I got a bunch of case reports that he hasn't filed yet, and the deadline is in two days."

"Try Izumo's desk," he suggested.

"Thanks."

Shizune cast him a thankful glance before furrowing her brows and running after the slacker.

Finally reaching Tsunade's office, Naruto grabbed the bronzed doorknob and gave it a good twisting, pushing the door open. Stepping into the Chief's office, his eyes went straight to the picture of his father hanging on the wall. He smiled at it before turning his attention to the woman behind the large mahogany desk.

"Hey Grandma, guess what?" He watched the vein on Tsunade's forehead throb as the Chief of Police gritted her teeth.

"How many times have I told you to stop calling me that?" Brown eyes glared at the intruding individual.

Naruto sat himself down in a chair opposite her desk and grinned.

The old bat was happy to see him no matter what she said, and he knew it.

"Guess." He wiggled his eyebrows.

Tsunade sighed and leaned back in her chair. What time was it? She glanced at the clock hanging on the wall. _Damn, it was already half past three_. Her eyes returned to the boy seated in front of her.

He could barely sit still he was so excited.

A smile played across her face, "Did you pass?"

"Hell yeah!" Naruto lifted his feet and rested them on the side of Tsunade's desk. Just like clockwork, Tsunade pushed Naruto's feet off with one of her books and stood up, walking around her desk before flicking him in the forehead.

Just like always, Naruto clamped both hands to his throbbing brow and glared daggers at the Chief.

Watching closely, Naruto followed Tsunade with his eyes as she walked across the room and opened a cabinet. Pulling out a little box from inside, she handed it to him. Naruto looked at the box in puzzlement. Slowly, he lifted the lid and pulled out a chain with a large blue crystal attached to it.

"What's this?" He asked, dangling the crystal in front of himself as he inspected it curiously.

"It's a crystal amulet," Tsunade replied, "I would like you to have it."

Naruto glanced at the Chief only to find her face set in a serious expression.

"I want you to wear it at all times, alright?"

Not quite sure what was going on here, Naruto nodded before putting the necklace around his neck.

Tsunade sighed in relief.

"Uh, thanks Tsunade," he mumbled sheepishly

She gave her head a nod.

Aching to go and tell more people the good news, Naruto licked his lips, "Have you seen Jiraiya anywhere? I checked in his office but he wasn't there..."

Trailing off, he swallowed hard as his eyes witnessed Tsunade snap the pencil she had been holding in two. A dangerous fire seemed to dance in her eyes as she leaned over her desk.

"Jiraiya," she let out a low chuckle, "Is off doing…research."

Hightailing it out of the room, Naruto barely managed to run through the door before he heard Tsunade's voice boom behind him.

"YOU TELL THAT PERV, WHEN I GET MY HANDS ON HIM, THERE WON'T JUST _BE_ A HOSPITAL HE'LL NEED BUT A _GRAVESTONE_ AS WELL!"

:::

Making his way towards Ichiraku, Naruto felt his stomach grumble. In his mind's eye he imagined a steaming bowl of ramen awaiting him. As he walked in, Teuchi and Ayame waved familiarly to him.

"Hey Naruto, long time no see," Teuchi joked.

"Let me guess," Ayame interjected before Naruto could say anything, "You'd like the ramen."

The blond blushed sheepishly, "Yeah."

"I reserved a table for you lot in the back," Teuchi said.

Naruto thanked the owner before heading toward the aforementioned table. He found most of his friends already there.

Kiba and Choji were having an arm wrestling match while Ino and Sakura argued about who was going to sit next to Sasuke when he got there.

Naruto sighed as his heart clenched painfully in his chest.

Sakura…

"Hey, Naruto," Temari greeted casually as she stood from her seat between her two brothers. Naruto smiled at the blonde as he approached.

Kiba groaned as his hand hit the table. Choji lifted both arms in the air as signs of victory, "I win. Now you have to buy me a bowl of sizzling beef sticks!"

Kiba cursed, "Damn it."

"I told you not to bet," Shikamaru lazily lifted his head off the table before he shifted on the bench to give Naruto enough room to slide in next to him. Gaara lowered his glass of water as he stared at the blond.

"So," the redhead spoke, "How did it go?"

"I passed," Naruto replied nonchalantly.

"Congratulations!"

"That's great!"

"That's very good," Gaara said slowly.

"Hn."

Blue eyes narrowed at the raven haired man standing in the doorway. The corner of Naruto's mouth drew upwards as he smirked, "Hey Sasuke, did you pass the examination yet?"

Upon reaching the table, the Uchiha calmly took a seat across from the anxious blond, "Yeah."

Naruto suddenly frowned, "When did you take it?"

Sasuke smirked but didn't say anything.

Nothing pissed Naruto off more than Sasuke ignoring his questions.

And the Uchiha knew that.

"Bastard," Naruto glared.

"When did you take the exam, Sasuke?" Sakura asked. She had her finger wrapped around a lock of pink hair, her eyes held steadfast on Sasuke's face.

The Uchiha sighed, "I took it the first day it was offered."

Naruto growled and was just about to say something when Ayame walked in with Naruto's bowl of ramen. The boy forgot whatever it was he was going to say as he dug into the most delectable thing his palate had ever tasted. Sasuke watched Naruto wolf down the noodles in disgust.

While the gang ate, Shino and Hinata arrived along with Neji, Tenten and Lee.

"Hey, Lee!" Naruto called, "I passed the exam!"

"That is great news, Naruto! This means we shall be working in the same building this year. I am so glad," Lee said happily.

"There is a lot of work," Neji said after he sat down, "The Precinct is really cracking down on the criminal this year."

"Hey Tenten, did you fill out the case report?" Temari asked her partner.

"Yeah," the brown haired girl grumbled, "Everyone at the precinct has been stuck at the desk filing this and that. I don't know _how_ Captain Gai does it, but he always has everything filed before the deadline! Seriously, he's like a _machine_!"

"Captain Gai is the best!" Lee stated, "There is no one better than Captain Gai! We train the hardest and capture the most criminals than any team, isn't that right Neji?"

Neji gritted his teeth. Just thinking about Captain Gai reminded him of all the embarrassing situations he'd been thrown into head first.

Lee took Neji's silence as a yes and began further praising Captain Gai.

"Hey, Sakura," Naruto looked up at Sakura, eyes locking with those of emerald green. Inwardly he sighed…her smile…it was that smile that had captured his heart four years ago.

"What's up, Naruto?"

"Have you taken the exam yet?" He asked.

She shook her head, "I'm taking it tomorrow morning." Sighing, she looked at the apathetic Uchiha with a dreamy expression, "Sasuke is going to make such a great cop."

And the moment was ruined.

Naruto leaned back in his seat, fuming.

Gaara tilted his head to the side, the action caused his bangs to slide over the tattoo imprinted on his forehead. He followed Naruto's gaze, not quite surprised when he found Sasuke the object of Naruto's discontent.

"N-Naruto," Hinata pulled lightly on the sleeve of the blonde's hoodie, her cheeks slightly pink.

Naruto turned his head towards her, a questioning expression on his face as he smiled up at the shy girl, "What's up Hinata?"

"Uh…I was wondering…was the written part of the exam hard?"

Shrugging, he slurped his noodles before responding, "I was never good with all those questions. For me, that was the hardest part of the exam," he rubbed the back of his head, "But I bet you'll do great on it. You're smart Hinata, just like Neji."

"Let's get some drinks to celebrate!" Kiba shouted. He signaled Ayame with a quick hand raise, "Drinks on me all around!"

As the alcohol came, the group cheered.

Shikamaru downed a shot and raised a fist in the air, "I am king." He let out a burp, earning himself a shove from Kiba who had a very sensitive nose.

"Shit, Shikamaru!" He growled, "How many time have I told you that if you're gonna spew gas, do it in the direction away from me!"

"How about a game of truth or dare?" Ino suggested, the alcohol in her system already showing its affects as evident as the red flush of her cheeks.

"Yeah!" Sakura chirped, "That's a great idea!"

"I'm in!" Naruto piped in.

It didn't take long for everyone to agree.

"Sakura, truth or dare?" Choji asked.

"Truth," she responded.

"How many guys have you slept with?"

"Two," the girl blushed.

Catcalls rung for a whole minute.

"Sasuke, truth or dare?" Sakura asked.

Sasuke sighed, "Truth."

"How many girls have you slept with?"

"…None…"

"Really?" Sakura frowned.

"Really," Sasuke answered dryly, "Kiba, Truth or Dare?" He asked.

"DARE BABY!" Kiba hooted.

"I dare you…to take off Shino's glasses."

Kiba cursed, "You're evil man." Turning in his chair, he stared at Shino's face. The other boy had his brows furrowed and arms crossed against his chest.

"You dare, you die," Shino stated plainly.

Kiba gulped, "I dare," Snatching Shino's glasses, he jumped out of his seat and made a run for it.

Needless to say, Shino was on him a mere few seconds later.

Coming back to the table, Kiba stubbornly rubbed at his cut lip. "You suck, Shino."

The pale man grunted, "I warned you."

"Fine, Hinata…truth or dare?"

"Truth," she said hesitantly.

"Have you ever kissed a boy?" Kiba grinned.

Hinata's cheeks flushed again, "Y-yes."

"Who?" Kiba asked excitedly.

"Can't ask more than one question, mutt," Neji grumbled.

"Ah screw you, Neji," Kiba glared at the spoil sport.

Eyes narrowing rather dangerously, Neji snorted. "You try, and you die."

"Jeez, what's with all these death threats?" Kiba grumbled as he leaned back in his chair.

"Gaara…truth or dare?" Hinata asked.

"Dare."

"I dare you…to…uh…to tell me when you got that tattoo," Hinata finally asked.

"Aw man, Hinata! You just wasted a perfectly good dare," Naruto whined, "You could have made him go grab Ayame's ass or something!"

A slap across the back of the head had curses rolling off Naruto's tongue. He looked up at Ayame who glared angrily at him.

Giving a rather nervous chuckle, Naruto rubbed the back of his head, "You know I love you, right?"

Ayame just rolled her eyes as she went to grab another couple of bottles.

"I got this when I was twelve," Gaara said slowly, "My father gave it to me."

"Oh," Hinata gulped.

Leave it to Gaara to make everyone in the room feel suddenly uncomfortable.

"Tenten, truth or dare?" Gaara asked.

"Dare," she grinned.

"I dare you to drink down three shots under thirty-five seconds and if you don't, you have to kiss Neji."

The Hyuga blanched, "What am I? Some sort of punishment?"

Tenten giggled as Choji poured three shots.

"On the count of three," Choji said, "One…two…three!"

Tenten drunk those shots so fast you would have thought her life depended on it.

"Wow, twenty seconds," Choji looked at her in shock.

"My turn," Tenten sang, "Neji, truth or dare?"

"Truth," he answered simply.

"Did you want me to kiss you?" she asked.

"Yes," Neji responded.

Tenten grinned and leaned down planting a loving kiss on her boyfriend's mouth.

"Alright you two," Kiba growled nursing his split lip, "This is not your sex cave, take it somewhere else."

Tenten pulled away from Neji and winked at Kiba. The brunette rolled his eyes in annoyance.

"Temari, truth or dare?" Neji asked.

"Dare," she grinned.

"Fine, I dare you to tell me how many times you've had sex with Shikamaru on MY DESK!" Neji fired.

Shikamaru's eyes immediately snapped open, "Hey, hey let's take it easy-"

"Fifteen," Temari said dryly.

"Fifteen times!" Kankuro all but choked, "Temari, what the hell?"

"Naruto, truth or dare?" Temari yelled trying to drown out her older brother's tirade about her sex life.

"Dare," Naruto grinned.

Temari smiled evilly, "I dare you to kiss Sasuke on the mouth using tongue for two minutes!"

The blonde's grin quickly disappeared only to be replaced with a look of sheer horror.

"No fucking way!" He hollered.

"It's a dare Na-ru-to!" Ino grinned.

"Yeah Naruto, you have to do it," Sakura agreed.

"Bushy brow!" Naruto looked to his friend for assistance only to find that the so-called _friend _was snoring loudly on the table.

Out cold.

"It's just a kiss," Neji said.

"Y-yeah," Naruto stammered, "With a guy!"

"It's nothing," Neji assured him. As proof, he grabbed Gaara by the collar of his shirt and planted a quick kiss on the redhead's lips, "See?"

Gaara glared daggers at the long haired man as he wiped his mouth with the sleeve of his shirt, desperately trying to cover his flaming face. "Do that again, and I'll sever your head from your body."

"Just do it, Naruto," Sakura said.

Temari snickered, "Or are you chicken?"

"I'm not chicken!"Naruto glared. He turned his head to face Sasuke. The raven was sitting in his seat staring coldly at him, daring the blond to touch him and live. Grumbling under his breath, Naruto walked around the table and stood in front of Sasuke. Then grabbing him by the arm, he lifted the Uchiha to his feet so that they were at eye level.

"Remember, on the lips! With tongue for two minutes!" Temari said, "And make it look hot!"

"Come on already!"

"Just do it, Naruto!"

"Let's see you two kiss!"

Naruto winced. He knew that somehow, _someway, _Sasuke always managed to ruin his day one way or another. He looked the glowering Uchiha in the eye and cursed, "Damn it."

Slowly he began to lean in.

Everyone stopped talking as Choji waited for lip contact to start the timer.

Naruto really, _really_ didn't want to do this.

Deciding the faster he moved, the quicker it would be over, he pressed his lips against Sasuke's.

Choji hit the timer.

Shocked that the blond hadn't actually chickened out, Sasuke's eyes widened into dinner sized plates.

"Come on, make it hot you two!"

"Sasuke, liven it up a bit!"

Naruto's stomach did a flip for some odd reason when Sasuke's arm wound itself around his waist. His heart hammered in his chest as the raven opened his mouth and ran his tongue against his bottom lip. Gasping at the gesture, Naruto opened his mouth.

Without fail, Sasuke's tongue entered inside the warm cavern.

Naruto didn't even notice how his hands let go of Sasuke's face, and gradually winded around the boy's neck. Sasuke's hip brushed against his sending a jolt up his spine. The boy let out a moan.

Why the hell did he just moan?

He did not just enjoy that, did he?

Naruto didn't understand why his body was reacting this way. He was kissing a guy, and not just any guy, but the Sasuke bastard!

Why was his heart rate racing, his stomach tightening and his body so damn sensitive?

Everyone just stared with mouths wide open.

Choji completely forgot about the timer as his eyes witnessed something he'd never believe if he hadn't seen it for himself. Naruto had moaned again!

Sakura stared wide eyed at the scene unraveling before her. She followed Sasuke's hand as it disappeared underneath Naruto's hoodie. The blond moved his body closer to the raven haired man as one of his hands slowly crept up to twist itself in the dark locks.

Naruto felt like his body was on fire. He was scared. What the hell was going on and _when_ was Choji going to call time? And….and this feeling…it felt good…_very_ good. He battled for dominance inside his own mouth, trying to gain the extra hand however, Sasuke wasn't going to give anything up, even in _this_ situation.

Damn…that…bastard…

"T-t-ti-time!" Choji stammered.

Sasuke and Naruto backed away from each other as if they'd suddenly been hit by lightening.

"Okay, I'm gonna go hurl now," Kiba groaned as he turned around.

"Y-you said make it hot," Naruto said a little out of breath.

"That's just what we did," Sasuke looked completely composed. Of course, Naruto could tell that the bastard wasn't. If there was one person in this world he knew how to read, it was Sasuke. After all, he saw the bastard on a daily basis throughout his entire life…and the guy looked a little shaken up.

"Let's call it a night, shall we?" Neji said.

"Great kiss you guys," Temari winked, "Totally hot."

Neji grabbed his sleeping partner and proceeded to leave.

Naruto decided to bolt as well. He needed space to think.

What had just happened there must have been the alcohol. Yes, it was definitely the alcohol. There was no way he would have reacted like that sober. He left his car keys with Ayame, not trusting himself to drive if the alcohol had made him react that way to kissing a guy. Kiba gave him a ride home, and soon Naruto found himself in bed, happy knowing he figured out the cause to his problem.

By the time Monday came around, Naruto was back to his old self. The kiss completely rationalized and forgotten.

He was at the precinct early, grinning foolishly and waving at every police officer he saw. Kotetsu smiled when he came in for work and saw Naruto standing in the hallway, the boy was just oozing energy as he jumped upon seeing him. Izumo grumbled as he walked past the two of them, heading for his desk.

He wasn't a morning person.

Before the dark haired man could get any further, Kotetsu grabbed him by the back of his collar and pulled him backwards.

"It's too early for this," Izumo yawned.

"Was I too much for you last night?" Kotetsu winked.

Izumo glared, "Shut up, moron. We have work to do. Don't mix personal stuff with work…"

"I would rather know as little as possible about your sexual lives please," Naruto grumbled as Kotetsu kissed Izumo on the cheek. The shorter man pushed his overbearing lover away and continued on to his desk.

"He loves it," Kotetsu winked at Naruto before chasing after his partner.

Before long, all the academy students who passed the examinations were huddled by the coffee machine.

Captain Asuma was standing in the middle of the room smoking his cigarette lazily. He waited for the clock to strike eight before handing out the badges, guns and uniforms.

Naruto's excitement was starting to rub off on his friends around him. Kiba was barely able to sit still once he received his badge, gun and uniform.

Once all the formalities were done with, it was time to assign partners and a captain.

"Alright," Asuma's voice rung, "When I call your name, please step forward and stand with your captain."

He cleared his throat, "Ino Yamanaka and Sakura Haruno. You are with Captain Anko Mitarashi."

The two girls walked over to violet haired woman.

"Shino Abarame and Kiba Inuzuka. You are with Captain Genma Shiranui."

"Hinata Hyuga, you are with Major Shizune."

Hinata had decided she wanted to help in the office since she couldn't keep her hand steady while firing a gun.

Naruto prayed he wouldn't be stuck with Sasuke. It would ruin his whole day, not to mention his police career.

"Please put me with Shikamaru or Choji," He begged quietly.

"Naruto Uzumaki and Sasuke Uchiha. You are with Captain Kakashi Hatake."

"Shikamaru Nara and Choji Akimichi. You are with me."

Naruto couldn't believe it. He was stuck with the Uchiha! He glared in the direction of Tsunade's office.

Oh, she was going to get an earful from him. She had better believe it.

Kakashi put his hand on Naruto's shoulder and smiled, his eyes squinting, "You sold me out to Shizune. I remember everything."

Naruto winced and laughed nervously, "Hehe…sorry about that, Kakashi."

"Idiot," Sasuke muttered.

Kakashi glanced at Sasuke and patted the raven on the head, "You better behave Sasuke…unless you want the Chief to find out about…ehm…things."

Sasuke's eyes narrowed, "You wouldn't dare."

"I would," Kakashi shut his book and motioned for the two men to follow. "I'll show you to your office space and then your police cruiser. Today you'll spend the whole day filling out paperwork. Doesn't that sound fun?"

Kakashi lead them down a hallway Naruto had never been down before. He wondered where it would take them.

Apparently, nowhere nice.

There were hundreds of desks packed into a single room. Naruto spotted Neji sitting behind one of them taking a phone call. He was scribbling something down hurriedly.

"What the hell is this?" Naruto wrinkled his nose.

"This," Kakashi pointed, "Is the bottom of the food chain. Unless you get promoted, all you'll be doing is looking for lost pets, lost bicycles, taking calls and if they're serious, you forward them to your captain…which is me."

"How can I get promoted?" Naruto asked, but Kakashi was already walking away with his nose in his erotica. "Damn it, isn't he supposed to show us where everything is?" Naruto grumbled as he stepped into the overheated room.

"Idiot," Sasuke grumbled, "You already know where everything is."

"Never asked for your opinion, bastard."

"Hn."

* * *

**Well there's the first chapter! Hope you guys enjoy. I know it's a little cliche with the truth and dare game, but it was necessary. Basically, this was an introduction to the story. Not much going on but it will get better. **

**Till next time!**

**Smartcat**


	2. 911 What's Your Emergency?

**Stuff In This Chapter:**** Eh...not much stuff going on here. Some swearing, picking on Sasuke and Naruto and IZUMO! (I love him!)**

**I love Kotetsu and Izumo, but they're very underappreciated in my opinion. Aren't they the coolest guys ever? Especially Izumo with his kawaii face!**

* * *

Chapter 2: 911 What's Your Emergency?

Naruto sat behind his desk grumbling miserably. It had been three weeks since he joined the force but he had _yet_ to step away from his desk and do something productive.

This was all Kakashi's fault.

So what if he had ratted the pervert out to Shizune, big deal! This punishment was definitely far worse than having to fill out case reports…Naruto was sure. He tightened his hold on the black balled pen in his hand.

This was absolute torture!

As the phone rang, Naruto narrowed his eyes at the black plastic contraption. Sasuke's hand reached out and grabbed it smoothly.

"This is Officer Uchiha, what seems to be the problem?" He answered. Naruto watched the vein on Sasuke's forehead throb as the raven haired Uchiha's annoyance grew. "Ma'am I need you to listen…yes I understand you are stuck inside your car…no ma'am…I understand you are feeling ill but…ma'am if –if you lift the lock up on the door the car should open…yes it should open even if nothing electrical is working….…is the car open now?...great…no problem…have a good day."

Sasuke hung up the phone and stood up, the corner of his left eye twitching.

"Do I wanna know?" Naruto asked.

"No," Sasuke grunted as he proceeded to go get a form to fill out for the 911 call.

Naruto banged his head against his desk completely bored out of his mind. Damn that Kakashi, he wouldn't even let them out to patrol the streets! After a quick rustle of papers, Sasuke returned with his form and began filling it out.

The door leading to the large room flew open, revealing Kiba strutting in with Shino following in tow. The bushy haired brunette held Akamaru's leash tightly while he made his way towards Naruto and Sasuke, a grin as wide as a bridge plastered on his face.

"Dude, you will not believe what me and Akamaru did today!" He said with excitement as he leaned on Sasuke's desk, patting Akamaru on the head.

"What? What?" Naruto begged trying to live vicariously through his friend's exploits. He was dying to know what went on beyond the four corners of his prison.

Kiba looked the blond squarely in the eye before responding, "We found a piece of a leg."

"What?" Naruto stood up quickly, nearly knocking his chair over in doing so, "Really?"

Kiba nodded, "Akamaru sniffed it out and I excavated it."

"Judging by the amount of bug activity, I'd say it looks to be about two months old," Shino said from his post behind the two. Slowly, Kiba and Naruto turned around to look at Shino. They both shuddered involuntarily.

"Shino…do you have to do that?" Kiba winced.

"Do what?" The other man said, staring at them from behind his tinted glasses.

"Stuff like that," Kiba shuddered again, "It's a little unnerving."

Naruto nodded his head in agreement.

"It's his job," Sasuke pointed out as he wrote, "If you two were uncomfortable with dead bodies, why'd you join the Special Unit?"

"Nobody asked you, bastard," Naruto grumbled.

Sasuke didn't say anything and continued to fill out his form.

Kiba scratched behind his ear before straightening up. He crossed his arms and looked at Naruto. "So, has Kakashi let you guys out yet?"

Naruto lowered his eyes, his hand tightening into a fist, "No," he said quietly.

"Fuck, that really sucks man," Kiba sighed, "Well we got to go, Genma wants us out on patrol." The brunette made his way towards the door, "See you later!"

As the two men left, the phone on Naruto's desk rang. Grumbling to himself, the blonde leaned over and picked it up.

"Hello, this is Officer Uzumaki speaking, what seems to be the problem?"

"I…"giggle, "…I want a large pizza with…" giggle, "…extra cheese and-" Naruto slammed the phone down and stood up to go grab a form.

Sasuke didn't even look up. "Prank call?"

"Pizza," Naruto grabbed the slip of paper and returned to his desk.

This really sucked.

Sighing, he looked up at the clock. Only two more hours till their lunch break.

Only two more hours before he could sniff out Kakashi and beg him to give them something to do that didn't require answering 911 calls and filing forms.

He glanced over at Neji's desk. The man was looking up something on his computer. Intrigued, Naruto wondered what it could be. _Maybe it was information for Captain Gai about his murder case, or checking out an alibi, or perhaps he was researching for some undercover work_!

"Close your mouth dobe, you're starting to drool."

Naruto's mouth snapped closed. He glared at the Uchiha, hoping that if he glared hard enough maybe the bastard would just burst into flame.

He didn't.

A few minutes later, Captain Gai came prancing into the room, "Neji, Lee, let's go!"

"Yes, Captain Gai!" Lee jumped out of his chair, grabbing his hat he ran to stand by his idol. Neji quietly stood from his chair and gathered his papers. Slowly, he put them in his drawer, grabbed his hat and then calmly walked to join his team. Captain Gai slapped him on the back with a grin and they were gone. Now the room was completely empty of officers and Naruto had no one else to stare at to pass the time.

Glumly he pulled open his drawer and took out his Glock 17. Running his fingers across the sleek black surface twice, he grinned before taking the gun apart.

The phone rang twice before Sasuke picked it up. Naruto didn't even care to listen in, he was busy counting the bullets on his desk. There were seventeen all together, just like yesterday and the day before that _and_ the day before that. He slowly reassembled the pistol, a frown marring his face when it lay complete on his desk.

Now what should he do?

Sasuke hung up the phone and went to retrieve another form. Naruto watched as the raven bent down to ruffle through some papers in a bottom cabinet. He grinned evilly and put his gun up, pointing it directly at Sasuke's behind that was now hovering above the desk. He chuckled quietly. Sasuke would definitely kill him if he shot him in the ass, he was sure of it. However, that didn't stop the blond from fantasizing about it. He could just imagine Sasuke's face and the idea of him getting shot in the butt was just too good.

Naruto's finger skimmed over the trigger.

He wouldn't do it of course…..but what if he said it was an accident? He could say he was examining the barrel and -no…he wouldn't buy that, heck, _he _didn't even buy that.

"Well that wouldn't end too well now would it?"

Startled, Naruto nearly pulled the trigger. The gun clattered onto the desk.

He had almost shot Sasuke in the ass!

"Kakashi," Naruto yelled, feeling his heart hammering in his chest from shock, "Give us something to do!"

"You are doing something," Kakashi put his book away and leaned against the wall, lazily crossing his legs.

"I mean something a little more exciting, even patrolling would be a step up!" Naruto whined.

"I need you to monitor the phones for today," Kakashi said simply, "It is important for an officer to-"

"Blah blah blah," Naruto rolled his eyes, "C'mon Kakashi, please! I beg you! Let us do something,_ anything_ other than sit here and take stupid phone calls!"

Sasuke quietly took his seat behind his desk and glared silently at the form before him. He hated agreeing with Naruto, but this was really very infuriating. If he had to deal with another stupid civilian, like the woman who locked herself in a car...well... then he couldn't be held responsible for his actions…

"What do you think, Sasuke?"Kakashi looked at the raven haired cop.

Sasuke grunted, "It would be nice to have a change of scenery."

"Ha!" Naruto pointed his finger at Kakashi, "Even Sasuke can't take anymore of this crap!"

ACHOO!

Three heads turned towards the doorway. Kotetsu came shuffling in with a form in his hand.

"Great," Kakashi sighed, "You too."

Kotetsu shrugged, "Sorry man, Shizune threatened to put me on night duty if I didn't get this to you," he sniffled, "Damn, this cold is really hitting hard. I think I'm starting to run a fever…maybe I'll go home early today," Kotetsu sneezed again as he handed Kakashi his case report.

"Hey, Kotetsu," Naruto called, "Can you please make Kakashi let us do something? Please, I can't take another blasted prank call or fake emergency."

Kotetsu gave Kakashi a look, "Why haven't you let them do anything, Kakashi? I mean, even _Anko_ lets her team out to do _some_ patrolling….and that's _our_ Anko."

Kakashi sighed, "Fine. You two can go on a patrol tomorrow after lunch."

"Yeah!"Naruto pumped his fist into the air. Even Sasuke let out a little smile.

Finally, they were going to do something other than secretarial work.

As lunchtime rolled around, Sasuke and Naruto made their way to the break room. Naruto held his instant ramen in one hand as he walked into the room. Sakura and Ino were already sitting at the table with their bento boxes open. Plopping himself across from Sakura, Naruto placed his ramen gently onto the table.

"Hey, Sakura!" He grinned at her.

"Hello, Naruto," Sakura blushed as Sasuke took a seat beside his partner, "Hello, Sasuke…how are you?"

Ino furrowed her eyebrows and elbowed the pink haired girl, "Sasuke, how's your day going so far?" She asked and smiled sweetly.

"Fine," Sasuke muttered as he opened his lunch.

Naruto rolled his eyes and stood up to get some hot water for his noodles. Honestly, he didn't understand what those girls saw in that brooding bastard. Fine, _maybe_ he had a handsome face and eyes that seemed to ensnare every female within a ten-foot radius.

So what if his body was well toned out? Naruto had a great body too but whenever he was around Sasuke, all the girls kept their eyes glued to 'mister tall dark and handsome.'

Naruto gritted his teeth…and Sakura. He frowned. She was looking at the bastard with her big green eyes. How much he wished for her to look at him that way. Sakura hung on every word the bastard said.

It really hurt to watch.

Naruto clenched his fist as he sat down. Sasuke glanced at the brooding blond but didn't say anything. He looked up when he heard footsteps approaching. A few seconds later, Izumo and Kotetsu came in. Sakura and Ino greeted the two captains warmly as they sat down at the table. Sasuke elbowed Naruto gruffly in order to bring him back to the world of the living. The blond gritted his teeth and pinched Sasuke's thigh as payback. Sasuke wasted no time in hitting the blond in the back of the head.

Naruto let out a yelp as his face almost hit his cup of ramen.

"Hey Naruto, have you seen Jiraiya recently?" Kotetsu asked, his voice sounding nasally.

The blond shrugged his shoulders, "Haven't seen the old pervert since yesterday morning," he scratched his forehead in thought, "I think he said something about having to finish his book before the end of the something or other."

"Ah," the officer smiled, "Jiraiya is having another one of his Icha Icha books coming out then."

Naruto nodded his head.

Kotetsu let out another sneeze and the girls attempted to cover their food.

"Watch it!"

"Cover your mouth!"

"Sorry," Kotetsu sighed, "I'm feeling a little under the weather."

Izumo turned Kotetsu's head slowly to face him. He gently pressed his lips to his lover's forehead.

Sakura and Ino sighed as they watched the two captains. Sasuke shook his head at the two females and continued his meal.

"I think you're running a slight fever," Izumo said after removing his lips.

"I thought as much," Kotetsu winced.

"You should take the rest of the day off," Ino suggested, "Rest up and eat a lot of chicken soup."

"I'll make some today," Izumo nodded, "I'm going to ask the chief if I could drive you home." Izumo stood up and left the break room passing Genma on the way. The officer entered the room and walked over to the coffee maker rather hurriedly.

"Damn it, Genma! Give it back!" A voice rung through the precinct halls.

Genma lazily looked past the door and shrugged his shoulders.

"You didn't," Kotetsu shook his head in disbelief.

Snickering, the sly officer pulled out a pair of boxers from his pocket. Quickly, he stuffed them behind the coffee maker before Raidou came bustling in wearing nothing but a towel.

"Where are my clothes?" He scowled at his partner.

"I told you to lock your locker when you shower at the station," Genma laughed as Raidou noticed the two female police officers sitting at the table, their eyes wide.

"I'm going to kill you when we get home," Raidou hissed as he took a step forward.

"Ah ah ah," Genma shook his finger as he picked up a hot cup of coffee, "Wouldn't want me to spill this accidentally now would we?"

Raidou looked at Kotetsu, "I'll give you fifty bucks if you know where my clothes are."

Kotetsu grinned, "Your boxers are behind the coffee machine. I'm guessing your pants could be found inside Shizune's desk."

Raidou shoved his hand behind the coffee machine and victoriously pulled out his underpants, "Ha!"

Genma glared at Kotetsu, "You suck," he said before running out of the break room to grab Raidou's pants and hide them somewhere else. The scar faced man was right behind him.

"Are those two gay also?" Ino asked Kotetsu.

"Your guess is as good as mine," the officer sniffled, "They live together in the same apartment, but that could be attributed to the fact that they are partners and it's just easier that way."

Naruto and Sasuke calmly ate their lunches.

This was just a regular day at the precinct for them.

:::

After his shift had ended, Naruto got in his truck and made his way towards Jiraiya's apartment. The old perv had called and asked him to swing by but Naruto didn't mind. He had some questions he wanted to ask anyway.

Naruto had barely time to knock before the old pervert swung his front door open and ushered him inside.

"Now, Naruto, I know you hate doing this," Jiraiya started.

Instantly Naruto locked his legs and refused to be led any further.

"Hell no old perv, I'm NOT doing _THAT_ AGAIN!"

Jiraiya fell to the ground before Naruto, hands clasped together and tears pouring down his cheeks like waterfalls.

"Please, I need to have this sent to my publisher tomorrow morning! I'll triple your allowance!" That caught Naruto's attention. The blond stared hard at his guardian, looking for any signs that could signal to him that this was going to end badly for him. When he didn't see anything that made him want to run for the hills, he sighed.

"Fine," Naruto let Jiraiya lead him into his writing room. The blond tried his best not to stare at all the posters of scantily clad women Jiraiya had slathered onto all the available wall space. He stood there, in the middle of the room, hands in pockets and stared at the floor.

He reminded himself to breathe through his nose when Jiraiya handed him the outfit he was to put on.

"Make sure to get the wig right this time!" Jiraiya hollered as Naruto disappeared into the bathroom to change.

"Shut up!" Naruto yelled as he slammed the door, his cheeks burning red from embarrassment. If anyone ever found out about this, he'd kill that damn pervert.

He eyed the dress Jiraiya had handed him and groaned loudly. If only Kakashi knew what went on behind the scenes of his most treasured Icha Icha series, he wouldn't obsess over them as much. Then again…..this was Kakashi, so anything was possible.

Swallowing his pride, Naruto began to take off his clothes and grumbled at the heavily padded bra in his hands. He quickly donned the frilly dress trying his best to avoid the mirrors. He heard Jiraiya mumble something outside the door but couldn't quite hear what the old man was saying.

"What?" He shouted.

"I said," Naruto heard Jiraiya say, "I've blackmailmh seghm inhu helping me ughnm as well. Hmehsoubeh here any minute now."

"Yeah yea, just don't forget you owe me triple," Naruto shouted as he struggled with the buckles on his shoes. He hadn't quite heard what the old pervert was saying.

Probably wasn't something important anyway.

Naruto straightened the blonde wig on his head to his best ability and pushed the bathroom door open.

"Hey perv," Naruto grabbed the black dress ribbon hanging loosely at his sides, "I need you to…tie…" the poor boy's mouth dropped open as he stared at Sasuke standing in the middle of the room with Jiraiya. He barely registered the raven pull out his phone.

SNAP!

Naruto jerked out of his trancelike state and tackled the Uchiha to the ground in his red and white frilly dress. He latched onto Sasuke's wrist as he tried to pry the boy's fingers from the phone.

"What the hell is he doing here?" Naruto panicked as he lost his hold on the other boy's wrist.

"I told you he was coming," Jiraiya stepped over the two boys wrestling on the floor and headed towards his computer.

"When?" Naruto screeched as Sasuke grabbed him by the front of the dress and pushed him to the floor.

"When you were in the bathroom," Jiraiya sighed, "I said that I blackmailed Sasuke into helping me tonight as well and that he should be here any minute."

"That's what you said?" Naruto yelled out, right before he attempted kneeing Sasuke in the groin.

"What did you think I said?"

"You've blackmailed me into helping you now and that I should hurry up and come out!" Naruto latched onto the cellular device and with one mighty pull, freed half of it from Sasuke's hand. Neither of the boys noticed Jiraiya open a closet and pull out a blue and white dress matching Naruto's, a pair of buckled shoes and a dark haired wig. He approached the brawl taking place in the middle of his room, grabbed Naruto by his collar, and flung him off the Uchiha. The raven attempted to grab the blond but Jiraiya managed to keep him at a safe distance with the sole of his foot pressed firmly against the man's chest.

"Now," Jiraiya cleared his throat, "Sasuke, go put this on. Make sure to put the wig on straight and try not to rip the knee socks, all right? I don't have a spare pair lying about."

Sasuke's eyes widened for a split second before his face furrowed into a scowl, "I'm not wearing that."

"That's where you're wrong," Jiraiya effortlessly grabbed a fistful of Sasuke's shirt and lifted him up to his feet, "I've got some real good dirt on you. With one touch of a button I can have the chief on the line in a matter of seconds."

The raven glared at Jiraiya for a minute then grabbed the dress the old man had pushed into his chest and went to change. Naruto watched Sasuke disappear into the bathroom before turning to the old pervert.

"Hey perv," he whispered, "What's the dirt on Sasuke?"

"Tell him and I'll kill you," they heard Sasuke say through the door.

Damn, that bastard had good hearing.

A few minutes later, Sasuke came out of the bathroom with his arms crossed and a permanent glare set on his face. Unlike Naruto, the boy had managed to tie his own bow.

"Now what?" Venom dripped from the Uchiha's voice.

"Now," Jiraiya stood from his chair, "I need you two to act out a scene."

He motioned for the two boys to come over. Then he began to explain, "Alright, here is what's going on. Yuki, that will be Naruto, just finished cleaning up the café and is about to close. Mai, that will be Sasuke, can't hold herself back any longer. She needs Yuki to be hers, but Yuki's boyfriend is going to be there within the next fifteen minutes to pick her up. Yuki doesn't know what to do. She's in love with her boyfriend but she can't help herself from wanting Mai as well. Now, I've worked out the scene where the two of them confess their need for one another, all I need you to do is give me a visual. I need details!"

Naruto was definitely seeing some blood dripping from the pervert's nose.

"Naruto, lie down on the floor and put one arm above your head." Naruto did as the pervert instructed and stretched out on the floor. "Sasuke, get in between his legs, place one hand above his head and the other one next to his thigh." Sasuke stood stock still, the sound of Jiraiya clearing his throat made him finally assume the position described.

"Good," Jiraiya ran and grabbed his laptop from the table and sat himself in front of his visual. Sasuke was glaring daggers at the blond lying beneath him. He gritted his teeth angrily as he heard Jiraiya typing away on his laptop.

Naruto was glaring right back at the bastard.

The atmosphere prickled with animosity.

"Naruto, I need you to stop cringing! Stop glaring! Sasuke, stop gritting your teeth! This is supposed to be hot and you're making it crap!" Jiraiya whined angrily. He put his laptop down and glared at the two boys.

"Sasuke, if you don't look like you wanna rip Naruto's clothes off in ten seconds, I'm calling Tsunade to tell her-"

"Fine!" Sasuke yelled before Jiraiya finished his sentence. The pervert grinned and watched the inner battle going on within the raven's head.

"You too, Naruto. I want to see lust! Be a whore for once in your life! Smile seductively, do something!"

"I'm a fucking guy!" Naruto hollered, "I can't do this!"

"You can and you will," Jiraiya said, "Or not only will I take away your allowance, but I'll also make sure that Kakashi keeps you at the precinct taking 911 calls for the rest of your life!"

Naruto wanted to shoot the pervert repeatedly. "Now give me something to work with!"

Jiraiya sighed.

Naruto looked like he just swallowed a lemon and Sasuke looked like he wanted someone to wake him from a bad nightmare.

This wasn't going to do.

"I bet Sasuke could pull this off better than you Naruto," Jiraiya said, mischief playing in his lecherous eyes as an idea popped into his mind.

Naruto's head snapped towards Jiraiya, "Oh yeah? I can do this better than this bastard any day!"

"Hn," Sasuke smirked. No way in hell was Naruto ever going to beat him in anything. EVER.

_And here we go_, Jiraiya thought as he recognized that competitive look in their eyes. He readied his laptop and waited.

Naruto grinned. He was _so_ going to wipe the floor with the bastard. Slowly, he brought his hand up and wrapped one finger into a few strands of dark hair.

"Good, Naruto! Hold that pose for a minute," Jiraiya said as he typed furiously, describing how Yuki adoringly wrapped her fingers in Mai's hair.

Sasuke smirked again, he wasn't about to be outdone by the dobe. When Jiraiya looked up, Sasuke slowly brought his hand to Naruto's thigh and hitched the skirt of the dress up an inch or two. Naruto growled, not liking Sasuke touching him.

"Yes, Sasuke!"Jiraiya leered as he typed the scene before him.

"Don't touch me," Naruto hissed angrily.

"What?" Sasuke leaned down so his nose was mere inches away from the blonde, "You can't handle it?"

Naruto growled, "I'll show you who can't handle what!" Naruto untangled his fingers from Sasuke's wig and let his fingertips brush against Sasuke's pale cheek. The raven let out a quiet laugh that Naruto didn't find to his liking. He felt Sasuke shift between his legs as the raven moved himself closer, the navy fabric of the dress brushed against Naruto's half-exposed thigh.

The blond shifted.

He didn't like this closeness, it was making him uncomfortable.

He didn't like the way Sasuke was looking at him….but he wouldn't admit it. Fine, if this was how that bastard was going to play it, then so be it. Two can play at this game.

Naruto forced the uncomfortable feeling aside.

Jiraiya watched as Naruto pushed the sleeve of Sasuke's dress down and caressed the milky white skin that was now exposed. His fingers trailed across the pale flesh, making their way towards the collarbone, and ended up cradling the raven's smooth chin.

Now Sasuke was the one who was growing uncomfortable with their close proximity. He internally cringed when he felt the warmth of Naruto's thigh pressed up against him. The Uchiha glanced into the crystalline blue eyes staring at him, daring him to do better.

Naruto frowned as he saw the corner of Sasuke's mouth twitch upwards. The raven pushed the rest of the skirt up and cupped the blonde's ass with his left hand.

Naruto hissed loudly.

He pulled the raven towards him by the neck so that their chests touched, their noses mere centimeters apart.

Jiraiya cursed himself for not being able to type fast enough. Both boys were well past their comfort zone but neither was willing to yield to the other. Naruto wanted Sasuke off him, he didn't like the way his body was reacting to the raven haired bastard. His heart rate had increased and his breath was coming to him in short grasps.

Sasuke's right hand unfastened the bow that held the blonde's dress tight to his body. As soon as the ribbon loosened, he thrust his hand inside to rest on Naruto's abdomen. He felt more than saw Naruto's breath hitch.

Sasuke didn't know why, but for some reason…he liked it. His heart was pounding hard in his chest as his fingers traced circle's on Naruto's exposed thigh.

…_Yuki squeezed the dark haired girl's breast and the girl let out a moan. She trailed her fingers across the exposed skin loving the feel of the heat against her. Unbeknownst to them, Reiko was staring through the glass window watching the two of them explore one another. His hand had made its way into his pants to stroke his impeding erection…_

"This is great!" Jiraiya exclaimed. He blindly wiped the drops of blood dripping from his nose away, "I've finally finished it! Icha Icha volume six, Heart Not Mine complete with a cliff hanger ending!" The old pervert jumped to his feet and grinned at the two boys who were hastily trying to disentangle themselves from each other.

"Wait till I te-"

"If you tell anyone about this," Sasuke stood up, his breathing not quite even, "I won't hesitate on killing you and making it look like an accident."

Naruto nodded his head furiously in agreement, "You better believe it!"

Jiraiya carefully pushed the picture he'd taken of the two of them deeper into his pocket.

"Fine, fine I won't say a thing," he held up his hands.

"Good," Naruto nodded then turned to Sasuke, "I'm planning on pretending this never happened. How about you?"

Sasuke gave Naruto his answer by throwing off his wig and giving a visible shudder, "Sounds good."

:::

Naruto lay in bed that night slapping his butt cheek every few minutes. For some reason he couldn't get rid of the feeling of Sasuke's hand resting on that certain spot.

He slapped it again, hoping the pain would erase the feeling of Sasuke's hand from his memory. It would work for a few minutes, but then the feeling would creep back. Growling low in his throat, Naruto got out of bed and ran into the kitchen to grab an icepack. He put it against his butt cheek in hopes of numbing the feeling away.

The cold was uncomfortable, but he preferred _it_ to the feeling of Sasuke's hand. It wasn't right for the feeling to linger like this.

Naruto considered calling a doctor. He looked up at his clock and cursed. It was two in the morning.

Damn that Sasuke bastard and his ghost hand on his ass!

He iced his butt for another ten minutes before running back to bed. If he could just fall asleep before that feeling came back, he was sure everything would be fine…

:::

The next day, Naruto came into work with a jump in his step. Today he was finally going to go out and do something police worthy. Sure, falling asleep last night had been a battle, but nothing could ruin his mood today.

"Sasuke is the designated driver," Kakashi said as he handed the Uchiha the keys.

"What? Why?" Naruto whined.

"I have something you don't," Sasuke said.

"And what's that?" Naruto banged his fist against the wall.

"A brain."

Naruto glared, "Fuck you, bastard!"

Sasuke rolled his eyes and made his way to the break room to get himself a strong cup of coffee.

"Why can't we leave right now?" Naruto grumbled once he figured out that there was no way to make Kakashi let him drive the cruiser.

"Because," the silver haired captain flicked him in the forehead, "Now you have 911 duty. You can go patrol after eleven."

"Damn it," Naruto pulled at a loose thread on his shirt.

Kakashi patted him on the head, "Good boy!" He said before turning around and heading for his desk.

"I'm not a dog!" Naruto shouted at his back. Kakashi lifted his hand in the air and proceeded to walk away. Just then, Naruto spotted Sakura making her way towards the break room. She seemed to be caring a box of some sort.

"Hey, Sakura!" Naruto yelled, "Wait up!"

Sakura turned and watched Naruto walk up to her, "Hey, Naruto. I heard Kotetsu is still sick so he's still home."

"Oh, that sucks," Naruto stuck his hands in his pockets, "Hey, Sakura…I was wondering if-"

"Sasuke!" Sakura waived her hand at the glowering dark haired man standing by the coffee machine.

Naruto winced, why did this always happen? Every time he tried asking Sakura out on a date, that stupid bastard always managed to screw it up for him. He glared at the dark eyed raven. Stupid Sasuke.

"…He's still sick so that's why I made some cookies for Izumo to take home," Sakura smiled at Sasuke. She loved the way he just stood there, listening to her so intently. Shyly, she opened the green tin box in her hands, "I was wondering if you'd like to try one."

"Hn."

"I'll try one, Sakura!" Naruto jumped in front of Sasuke and stuck his hand into the cookie tin. Sakura furrowed her brow, "Easy there Naruto, don't take them all!"

Sasuke stared at the cookie Naruto held in his hand. He reached into the tin and pulled one out for himself, examining it.

"You said you made this yourself?" He inquired

"Yeah," Sakura blushed.

"Man these are really good, Sakura," Naruto swallowed his first cookie and started on the second, "I like the nuts but you could have held on to the raisins."

Sasuke's eyes suddenly widened, "Sakura," he grabbed the girl by her shoulders, forcing her to look him straight in the eye, "When did you give these cookies to Izumo?"

"Uh…when I got here…like an hour ago?" She frowned, "Why? Kotetsu isn't allergic to nuts is he?"

Naruto froze, the cookie dropping from his hand.

"Lock the door, you idiot!" Sasuke shouted at Naruto.

"What's going on?" Sakura asked, confusion evident on her face.

"IZUMO I WILL SHOOT YOUR WHITE ASS!" Kakashi yelled.

"Aw shit!" Naruto and Sasuke ran for the door at the same time.

They had almost made it.

Almost.

Izumo burst into the room with inhuman strength, "NARUTO! MY FAVORITE BLOND BALL OF JOY!"

It was all over for the two men.

They lunged away from the insane cop, only to be pulled back by the scruff of the neck.

"Naruto, you should really become gay you know," Izumo chuckled evilly as he tried to loosen the blonde's pants.

"Get off me, you freak of nature!" Naruto hollered as he kicked out with his feet.

Sasuke was trying his best to get out of his shirt and slip out the window. Izumo catching on rather quickly, grabbed Sasuke's left leg causing the man to fall face forwards, "Don't think I've forgotten you, my little sexy demon!"

Naruto tried fighting off Izumo who had skillfully wrapped his leg around his feet, leaving him immobile. Reaching desperately into his pocket, Naruto pulled out his phone, all the while trying to keep his pants on. Izumo laughed evilly as Sasuke wriggled on the ground. No one was a match for him.

Naruto quickly scanned through his contacts finding Kotetsu's number and dialing it as fast as he could. The phone rang three times before Naruto heard the sweet sound of Kotetsu's voice on the other line.

"Hello?"

"GET YOUR BOYFRIEND OFF OF ME RIGHT NOW!"

Kotetsu sighed into the phone, stifling a cough, "Did Genma give him raisins again?"

"NO, THIS TIME IT WAS SAKURA AND HER COOKIES OF DEATH!"

"Hey!" Sakura glared daggers at Naruto.

"I'm kind of indisposed right now," Kotetsu sneezed to make his point.

"HE'S TRYING TO PULL MY PANTS OFF!" Naruto screamed into the phone.

"Just let him see-"

"FUCK NO!"

"Let me see it!" Izumo wriggled his hand, "I wanna know if it's blonde down there too!"

"HELP! IZUMO'S RAPING ME!"

"Izumo, you idiot! Let me go or I'll shoot you!" Sasuke snarled as he tried to pry Izumo's fingers off his pants. Naruto hung up on the good for nothing that was Kotetsu.

Sakura just stood there like an empty space and stared.

Naruto stopped wriggling for a moment to lull the pervert into a fall sense of security. Izumo unzipped Naruto's pants and before he got a chance to even see what color boxers the blond was wearing, Naruto back headed the pervert. The insane man loosened his grip on Naruto letting the blond escape from his captivity. Izumo whined and tightened his grip on Sasuke, now fully able to press the Uchiha up against his body.

"I'll buy you ramen!" Sasuke yelled.

"Hell No!" Naruto shook his head furiously.

"I'll buy you ramen five times and delete the picture from yesterday off my phone!"

Naruto squeezed his eyes shut. Crap. He couldn't refuse that. "Damn it!"

At that precise moment, he spotted Neji approaching through the glass window. He was just about to signal for help when the grey eyed officer, once spotting Izumo and the state he was in, ran as fast as he could in the opposite direction.

Damn it, how did Kotetsu deal with him when Izumo got like this? He racked his brain for a minute then shook his head to clear it of the memory. There was no way in _hell_ he was going to do that. Naruto sighed, he felt bad about what he was about to do, but it couldn't be helped. Taking one giant breath, Naruto readied his fist.

He had one shot at him.

He had to knock him out while Izumo was still trying to undress Sasuke.

With a determined look on his face, Naruto charged at Izumo and before the pervert saw it, Naruto's fist collided with his chin, causing the raisin-high cop's head to snap to the side.

He fell to the ground out cold.

Sasuke heaved an unnoticed sigh of relief and righted himself before anyone could notice his dishevelment. Naruto turned around and pointed at his partner, "Delete it. Now."

The Uchiha rolled his eyes as he pulled his phone from his pocket and deleted the picture he took from yesterday.

"I see you got Perverted Izumo under control," Naruto's head turned to find Genma leaning lazily against the door, toothpick in mouth.

"Where the hell were you?" Naruto pointed an accusatory finger at the Captain.

"Now now, I may be the one to spike his food with raisins every now and then but I would never," Genma shook his head, "Ever, do it when Kotetsu isn't around and I don't have my five foot pole. Then it's dangerous. What if he attacked me?"

"He gets like this when he eats raisins?" Sakura looked at them incredulously.

"Hn," Sasuke grabbed his cup of coffee and headed out of the room as if nothing had happened.

"You're safe because you're a girl," Naruto grumbled, "When he eats those raisins, his libido steps it up a hundred fold, so any male within a ten foot radius…beware."

"Raidou! The coast is clear! Come help me tie him up!" Genma yelled after he stuck his head outside the door.

"Why are you tying him up?"

Naruto glanced over at Sakura, "So he won't attack anyone else."

"How long does it last?"

"Eh…depends on how many he ate," Naruto shrugged his shoulders, "Could be anywhere between thirty minutes to three hours."

Genma sat himself down on Izumo's chest as he handcuffed the unconscious officer's hands and feet. When Raidou appeared, the two of them lifted the unconscious brunette and sat him up in a chair. Raidou then proceeded in tying him to the chair with rope.

Lots and lots of rope.

"Don't you think you're overdoing it a little?" Sakura raised an eyebrow.

Genma let out a low chuckle, "He might not look it, but this guy is as strong as an ox. Once, Raidou here forgot to handcuff him and this sex crazed lunatic broke out of the ropes and nearly raped Aoba."

"Aoba? Who's he?"

"Aoba used to work here," Naruto answered, "Until Izumo here boomeranged the guy into Gaysville."

"Huh?"

"He turned the guy gay," Genma drawled.

"How?"

Genma turned a pointed stare at the pink haired officer. Her eyes widened as her mouth formed a little 'O'.

The two captains finished securing their hostage before taking a step back.

"Let's go."

"No Raidou, not yet," Genma grinned and pulled the toothpick out of his mouth. He twirled it between two fingers and chuckled.

"Leave him alone, Genma," Raidou warned.

"But this is my favorite part!"

"No."

"What's Genma going to do?" Sakura whispered to Naruto.

"He's going to torture him."

Genma inched towards the unconscious cop, put his hand over the other's mouth, and held his nose. A few seconds later Izumo was wide awake. Genma stifled a chuckle as the closet pervert's eyes attached themselves to Naruto's butt. The blond took a step behind Sakura.

"Gimmie the blond!"

Raidou shook his head and left the room. He was not about to take part in such behavior.

"Hey Izumo, look what I got," Genma pulled out a pair of handcuffs and twirled them around his finger.

"Kinky…I LIKE!"

"Do you want my handcuffs, you sexy thing?"

"I want you naked right now!" Izumo tried to loosen the ropes that held him to no avail, "Bondage good! Kinky good! Just get your ass over here!"

Naruto quietly tiptoed towards the door, leaving Sakura staring at the scene before her.

It was times like these where Naruto had not doubt Genma was gay. Moreover, what the heck was up with Sakura? Was it just him, or was she enjoying this?

He shuddered.

Girls were so weird.

As he made his way to the room he shared with all the low ranking officers, Naruto spotted Lee hiding not so well behind the water cooler.

"Coast is clear, or haven't you heard?"

Lee jumped up, "No, Naruto. I was just doing some spy training!"

Naruto grinned, "Sure you were."

"No," Lee sighed, "You are right, Naruto. It's just that…well you remember my first time, right?"

Naruto nodded. He remembered it vividly.

"Say no more," Naruto put his hand over bushy brow's shoulder. The two of them headed for their desks. Sasuke was already sitting behind his, talking to someone on the phone. He hung up just as Naruto took his seat.

"Who was that?"

"Hn."

"Bastard."

:::

The few hours passed by quickly and soon Naruto and Sasuke were heading out to their cruiser. They passed Izumo on their way out and it looked like he was back to his normal self, although now he had Sakura trailing behind him. The poor man was grumbling something about 'murder' and 'Genma.' Naruto didn't quite catch all of it.

Kakashi had instructed them to patrol the West end of the city. Once Sasuke got into the car, Naruto began being a pain in the ass.

Again.

"This is great!"

"Shut up, dobe."

"Bastard! I can't wait for them to radio us in! Maybe we'll have to catch a burglar or go looking for body parts like Kiba and Shino!"

"Idiot," Sasuke sighed, "Kiba got special training with the canine unit. Don't forget his mom is in charge of training those dogs."

"Yeah I know," Naruto mumbled, "Still, it would be so cool!"

"Hn."

Naruto threw a glare in Sasuke's direction. He hated it when that bastard 'Hn'd' at him. It drove him crazy!

Stupid Sasuke…

They had barely been on patrol for ten minutes when the radio crackled to life. Naruto lunged for it, his fingers trembling with excitement.

Sasuke slapped his hand away, "Idiot. Wait for them to say something first."

Naruto winced, his cheeks turning a bright shade of red.

"…This is Officer Yamanaka. I need cruiser 4.1.6 to come in."

Naruto grabbed the radio, "Hey, this is Naruto Uzumaki, what's up?"

Sasuke gritted his teeth, his hands tightening on the wheel as he listened to Naruto's improper radio answer.

"…Naruto, this is serious, stop fooling around!"

"Fine fine, don't get your panties in a twist Ino-"

Another radio called in "You know we can hear you, right?" Kiba's voice reverberated.

Naruto scowled at the radio device in his hand, "Get the hell out, Kiba."

"…Naruto, I need you to report to Shigure's Jewelers, the alarm went off," Ino said, "It's at Seventeen Harlow road. You got that?"

Sasuke grabbed the radio out of Naruto's hand, "Roger, we'll be there in five." He threw the radio into Naruto's lap and made a U-turn. Naruto dejectedly placed the radio back in the holder and glumly stared out the window.

"I could have done that," he mumbled.

"Hn."

Apparently, the jeweler messed up his security password and couldn't get inside his store. Sasuke had to radio in to the station to get them to turn off the alarm and send for DigiSecurity to help the man.

Naruto itched for some excitement.

This was boring.

No shooting, no chasing…man, the stories everyone told sounded like so much fun! Why did he have to get stuck with all the annoying cases? Naruto slumped against the hood of the cruiser, his arms crossed lazily across his chest as he watched Sasuke deal with the old man. A few minutes later he heard the radio crackle. The blond lunged at the door nearly ripping it off as he reached for the radio.

"…This is Officer Akimichi. I need cruiser 4.1.6 to come in."

Naruto grabbed the radio, "This is Officer Uzumaki."

"…Hey, Naruto."

"Hey bud, what's up?"

"…I need you and Sasuke to swing by an apartment building on 36th and Prince. The number is 1501. Some lady called complaining about some kind of wailing coming from the apartment next to hers. Check it out alright?"

"Sure thing dude, by the way were you at the precinct this morning?"

"…Kind of, but not really. Captain Asuma had Shikamaru staring at a bunch of maps today while I sat there twiddling my thumbs."

"Uh…okay Choji, I'll see you later."

"…Have fun!" And the line went dead.

Naruto put the radio back and pulled the upper half of his body out of the car. "Hey Sasuke!" He shouted, "We've got to go!"

He saw Sasuke nod his head and a few minutes later, they were on their way. It took them a good ten minutes to get there and when they did, Naruto didn't like the look of the place. The building looked run down.

A few broken bricks lay scattered across the cracked sidewalk. Naruto tried his best to breathe through his mouth as the awful smell catapulted into his nostrils. He coughed, stealing a quick glance in Sasuke's direction. His partner seemed unfazed by it all. The wrinkling of his nose being the only indicator that he had any opinion at all about the place.

"Man this reeks!"Naruto held his nose closed with two fingers, trying his best to block the smell from raping his nasal passage. Sasuke slapped the back of Naruto's head before locking the cruiser and stepping towards the building. The blond cursed as he rubbed the back of his head. That bastard was going to get it real bad one of these days, Naruto vowed, he would make sure of it.

A middle aged woman stood at the door waiting for them. Her teeth caught Naruto's attention first. He tried his best not to stare at the rest, but it was awfully hard.

"It's up on the sixth floor," the woman grunted.

Naruto wondered if the woman had a tooth in her mouth that wasn't completely black. Sasuke pinched him and Naruto jerked, shifting his eyes from the woman's teeth. He glared at the smooth talking bastard while he rubbed his side. The lady escorted them into the building and led them to the apartment where the noise was coming from.

"It's been howling like that for a good six hours. This apartment was just rented out a week ago. We're not supposed to have pets here either," the woman scratched her head. Naruto took three steps away from the woman just in case lice could fly.

"I've been banging on the door since eight this morning and nothing!"She glared and hit the door with her fist, "I told you I'd bring them!"

"Ma'am, would you please go back to your room," Sasuke instructed, his voice carrying authority that couldn't be disputed. The woman sniffed but did as she was told and disappeared behind her own door. Once they were alone Sasuke motioned for Naruto to come closer.

"Do you smell that?" He asked his voice barely above a whisper.

Naruto narrowed his eyed, "You're joking, right? The whole place reeks!"

"Take a whiff."

Naruto grumbled but took a sniff, his eyes watered, "It reeks!" His voice came out a little squeakier than he intended.

Sasuke wasn't surprised.

"Hn." He knocked on the door, "This is the Police."

No answer.

Sasuke reached for the doorknob. He grabbed it and gave it a twist.

They heard the lock click.

The two of them exchanged looks.

Naruto pulled out his Glock and readied himself.

Sasuke held his gun to the side as he pushed the door forward. The blond wheeled into the room gun poised to shoot.

There was no one there.

However, Naruto didn't let his guard down as he opened the closet to his left and checked inside. As he neared the kitchen, the smell hit him full force. He stumbled back a bit. Sasuke gripped his shoulder to steady him.

Naruto grimaced, trying to shake the pale hand off. Sasuke rolled his eyes and the two of them entered the kitchen.

That's when he saw it.

Naruto gagged.

There was so much blood.

Sasuke reached for his hand held radio, "This is Officer Uchiha requesting back up at 36th and Prince. I've got a dead body here."

Naruto blinked. His eyes refused to register what was before him. The man's body had been removed of all his vital internal organs! The skin was all purple and the smell... god, the smell was revolting! Naruto shook himself, _Get a grip on yourself!_ He turned his attention to the wailing coming from another room in the apartment.

Slowly, Naruto edged his way towards the noise while Sasuke continued to talk on the radio. Carefully, he turned the door handle.

It was locked.

He cursed as he rummaged around in his pocket looking for his lock pick. When he finally found it, he began to work quickly. The click of the lock release was music to his ears. Naruto pushed the door open and stepped inside.

There was a metal crib standing on the side of the room. The wailing seemed to be coming from there. Naruto approached it and leaned over.

What he found made him drop his gun.

A little baby lay crying in the crib, its face red and streaked with tears as it stretched its little fists in the air begging for someone to help.

* * *

**Oh! Dun Dun Dun!**

**Naruto wanted some excitement and he sure as hell got it, maybe he should have thought twice...who are we kidding, Naruto rarely every even thinks once!**

**That call Sasuke received from a civilian actually happened in real life to a cop. Some woman called and said she was trapped inside her car and that she couldn't get out and needed help. What is the world coming to? I want to go find that woman and ask her how she managed to stay alive for so many years because according to me (and Sasuke) her stupidity should have gotten her killed ages ago.**

**Also, before you ask me if there is a fine for prank calling the police let me tell you something...In my story (and the world of Naruto which I have commandeered) you can prank call the police as much as you want! So please refrain from badgering me about it.**

**2/7/11-There is some fanart dedicated to this chapter on my profile page if you wanna check it out. It's the scene with Jiraiya hehe...**

**Reviews are greatly appreciated!**

**-Smartcat**


	3. We're In Hell, Believe It!

****For the people who have asked: I am currently editing this story. There is one more chapter left to fix before I post new material. Please bare with me.****

**Warning: Dead Body, so might get a little graphic. **

* * *

Chapter 3: We're In Hell, Believe It!

Hanging up on his radio, Sasuke approached the body lying on the kitchen floor. Pulling a pair of latex gloves out of his pant pocket, he kneeled beside it. Wrinkling his nose, he steeled himself as the smell of death grew stronger with every inch forward. Pen and pad already in hand, Sasuke peered closely at the deceased victim.

Blood had pooled in certain areas of the body as well as dried bits of it clung to the tiled floor, coating the ground in a fine layer of coppery mist. Squatting down by the deceased victim's head, Sasuke examined the lacerations, noting the depth of some of the cuts.

As he peered at a distinct gash on the victim's thigh, a glint of steel glistening in the far corner caught his attention. He turned his head in order to get a better look, _a kitchen knife…how convenient_.

Maybe the forensics unit would be able to lift some prints off of it. Grunting, he turned his attention back to the dead man.

The abdominal cavity seemed to be missing almost every vital organ. The stomach however, remained intact along with the urinary bladder and prostate. Scrutinizing the chest, Sasuke thinned his lips at the evident signs someone cracking the ribs open. Upon further inspection, he saw that the heart had been removed.

Poking the body with his index finger, he felt its stiffness and frowned.

It was in full rigor mortis.

He examined the tips of the man's fingers and noticed they were severely burnt. The young officer surveyed the man's toes to find that they too, had been burned to a point where lifting a print would be near to impossible. Lifting the dead man's lip, Sasuke grunted when he found that whoever had been responsible for this, had at _least_ left the man with his teeth. _Maybe Kurenai will be able to ID him with his dental records_.

Straightening up, he walked towards the hall, removing his gloves on his way and throwing them onto the cracked counter. This was it. His first murder case. With a light grunt, he glanced towards the door. Kakashi said he'd be here with a unit within the next fifteen minutes.

The Uchiha was just about to go looking for his partner when the blond walked out of a room holding a wriggling bundle to his chest. Sasuke's eyes narrowed slightly as he saw a little hand reach up towards Naruto's face. His partner looked up at him, blue eyes pleading.

"Dobe," Sasuke growled.

This was not happening again.

"Sasuke," Naruto said quietly, "I think he's sick."

The raven shook his head furiously, "Remember what happened last time you got attached?"

"It's not like last time!" Naruto said defensively.

"You can't do this every time you find some defenseless looking thing." Sasuke grabbed Naruto's shoulder harshly, "Don't you remember all the abandoned animals you _simply_ couldn't part with?"

"He's not an animal!" Naruto glared.

Sasuke's eyes softened so slightly that had you not been watching, you wouldn't have even noticed, "That's why I can't let you do this." The raven pulled the bundle out of his partner's trembling hands carefully. "We're going to locate his next of kin and hand him over. You are going to be professional about this. No moping."

The infant began to cry in the raven's pale arms. Sasuke looked at the tear-streaked face and tried to quiet the child but it was no use. The baby began to wail and wriggle in his arms. Sasuke's lips thinned and he handed the little banshee back to Naruto. "Hold on to him till we get back to the precinct."

"What if I get attached?" Naruto glared, smirking when he saw Sasuke stop midstride.

"Hn."

"Bastard! I don't want to watch this kid anymore than you do!" He fired, "All I want to do is some police work!"

"Dobe."

Naruto gritted his teeth. He was about to yell some very colorful things at the prick when the baby's little fist bumped with his chin. He looked down into small blue eyes, his expression softening, "What are you looking at?"

:::

Kakashi stepped out of his cruiser and stretched his aching limbs. Glancing at the worn down building, he gave his neck a good crack before starting towards the entrance. Genma and Raidou were right behind him, each wearing a solemn look along with Kurenai and the rest of her medical unit. With practiced precision they calmly made their way inside the decrepit building, heading straight to the room that had been marked a crime scene. Once Kakashi stepped inside the rundown apartment he froze. His eyes landing on Naruto and the bundle in his arms.

"_Now, Kakashi I know you're a smart kid so please don't look at me like that," Minato smiled as he rocked his son, "ANBU is supposed to make you want to go crazy. Only a select few can handle the pressure."_

"_Kakashi is a little princess," Obito gleamed, smacking his rival on the shoulder, "Ain't you, Kakashi?"_

_Kakashi's hands turned to fists, the rope around his wrists started digging painfully into his skin. If Obito called him a princess one more time…he'd punch that idiot straight into hell itself._

"_It's not the pressure," Kakashi said thinly as he glared at the Uchiha standing next to him._

_Minato chuckled, "In ANBU, you have to learn how to work with everyone, including the people you, at first, can't stand."_

_Kakashi rolled his eyes at his teacher._

"_I wouldn't have taken the two of you as my students if I didn't think you were up to it. Unlike the special unit, ANBU carries out missions that are usually physically, psychologically and emotionally draining. I wouldn't hold it against either of you if one of you decided to just stay in the special unit or even if you wanted to be stationed at a different precinct as a plain officer of the law."_

"_Sensei, I want to be here!" Obito declared loudly._

"_Me too," Kakashi said._

"_Ha! Even the little genius wants to stay in ANBU."_

_Minato ruffled Kakashi's hair, "I'm glad you decided to join the force Kakashi, even though you're just sixteen years old. "Minato smiled, "When I'm through with you, there won't be anyone in all Fire Country with enough skill to outwit you." Kakashi's eyes closed as his mouth broke out into a smile no one could see because of the mask he wore. Obito rolled his eyes._

_Kakashi had graduated from college at the tender age of fifteen. It came as a shock to everyone when the silver haired boy decided to become a police officer. However, Minato was not surprised in the slightest. The kid had been volunteering in the precinct from the age of nine. While he was still a Captain, Minato would often take the little protégée out for a ride in his cruiser when the precinct wasn't too busy. Even Jiraiya had taken a special interest in the boy, but it was all the time and effort of Minato that had made the young man excel._

_Kakashi finally had Obito on the ground, his tied up hands around the dark haired man's throat, "You lose."_

_Obito gritted his teeth, "Shut up!"_

_At that moment, Naruto whimpered in his father's arms. Minato frowned and felt his son's forehead, "Seems like the fever hasn't gone down. I need to go buy some more of that medicine the doctor prescribed. Obito, can you grab me Naruto's coat?"_

"_We could watch him," Kakashi offered, "I wouldn't mind."_

"_Yeah, me and the princess could keep an eye on him, don't you worry about it!"_

_Kakashi growled at the annoying man next to him._

"_Well…alright. I'll be back in twenty minutes," Minato gingerly handed over his son to Kakashi. He placed a gentle kiss on Naruto's forehead before running out the door. Kakashi stared into the face of Minato's one-year-old son. The boy's skin was flushed and his cheeks felt warm._

"_He doesn't look so good," Obito said quietly._

"_He's sick," Kakashi glared at his rival and friend, "Honestly, Obito, you could be so stupid at times. Aren't you Uchihas supposed to be smart or something?"_

_Obito grumbled something about 'bastards' and 'geniuses.'_

"Hey, Kakashi!" Naruto approached the wide eyed man, "We need someone to look at this kid, I think he has a fever or something."

Kakashi jolted out of his memory.

The blond looked at him questioningly, "Is everything alright, Kakashi?"

The Captain smiled and ruffled the blonde's hair, "Yep."

"I was thinking maybe Kurenai could take a look," Naruto put his lips to the child's forehead, "He's still warm."

"I think it'd be best if you two went back to the precinct and had Shizune take a look," Kakashi said after a quick examination of the infant.

"Hn."

Naruto rolled his eyes and turned to look behind him. The Uchiha stood a few feet away leaning against the wall with his hands in his pockets. A smirk played across his features causing Naruto to scowl at his pale skinned associate. Kakashi smiled to himself, watching the silent exchange between the two rivaling friends.

"Get going," Kakashi made a shooing motion towards the door. Sasuke straightened up and made his way out, the keys to the cruiser already dangling from his slender fingers. Naruto pulled the child closer to his chest and made his way out behind Sasuke.

"Kakashi," Kurenai called.

The silver haired man turned and made his way to the crime scene already decked out in yellow criminal tape. Kurenai was kneeling over the body, examining something curiously.

"What is it?"

"I think you should take a look at this," Kurenai reached out her hand and opened her palm. Carefully Kakashi took the small object from her and peered down at it closely. He frowned. In his hand he held a small blood red pin in the shape of a cloud.

"Where did you find this?"

"It had been pierced through the man's tongue."

:::

Sasuke finished assembling the car seat that had been sitting in the trunk of their cruiser. He motioned for his partner to get the baby inside. Naruto carefully strapped the whimpering child in and then walked over to his passenger seat.

Upon reaching the precinct, the two officers were somewhat surprised to find Shizune waiting for them in front of the station. Sasuke pulled up to the curb and had Naruto roll down his window.

The dark haired woman quickly approached. "Kakashi radioed about a sick child?"

Naruto worriedly looked and pointed towards the backseat. Shizune nodded, opening the passenger door and quickly removing the infant from the car.

"I thought he might have a fever," Naruto offered after he and Sasuke came out of the car.

Shizune nodded her head but didn't say anything. Slowly, she pressed her thumb and index fingers against the baby's cheeks. The infant's mouth opened letting Shizune have a look inside. Her eyes seemed to relax for a minute before hardening into stone.

"Well the little guy is teething, that's obvious," she said, "What's odd is that the child's breathe smells of alcohol."

"What?" Naruto furrowed his brow.

"Someone gave this child alcohol. That is a highly dangerous thing to do; it can damage the boy's brain and cause many different health problems. I've heard that some people give a child a drop of wine to help them sleep through the night, however it isn't recommended."

"Damn," Naruto worriedly bit his lip.

"We found the kid at the crime scene along with a pillaged body," Sasuke stated, "I thought it would be best if we could start looking for the next of kin. I was about to go send a fax to all hospitals within a fifty foot radius with the child's fingerprints and physical description."

"Yes yes," Shizune nodded, "Just stop by Tsunade's office first. She wanted to see you two as soon as possible."

"Alright."

Naruto gave Shizune and the kid a quick wave before heading inside the precinct building. On their way to the Chief's office, the two bumped into Choji.

"Hey, is it true?" The pudgy man asked, his hand tightening over a crinkly bag.

Naruto nodded his head gravely, "Yeah. We found a dead guy with all his organs remo- hey!"

The blond winced, rubbing his arm. He threw Sasuke a glare. The raven took no heed and proceeded on towards the Chief's office. After promising to tell Choji the story in greater detail later, he ran after Sasuke.

Naruto grumbled when he walked into Tsunade's office and found Sasuke and the Chief waiting for him. He apologized hastily and went to stand next to the bastard. Tsunade sat at her desk, her eyes closed in thought. After a minute or so, she opened them and focused her attention on the crystal necklace protruding from behind Naruto's shirt.

"I want everything I'm about to tell you, never to leave this room," her voice was low causing Naruto to strain in order to hear her speak. "You two have just stumbled on an unfortunate victim that had been terrorized by a hidden secret organization we know little to nothing about. All we've got on them is a list of dead bodies, each sporting a cloud pin fixed into their tongue. However, we know of one man who's had dealings with this band of thugs," Tsunade paused and looked at Naruto, her eyes remorseful, "Orochimaru."

Sasuke cast a sideways glance at his partner. The blond had tightened his hand into a fist at the sound of the name. His mouth had formed into a thin line.

Sasuke was somewhat surprised the Naruto didn't burst out with some heated comment.

"As the two of you may know, Orochimaru is the leader of the prostitution ring Minato had tried to bring down."

"Why is that snake still walking around," Naruto asked coldly. His cerulean orbs raging at the injustice.

"There are surprisingly many people, who apparently, find their lives are more usefully spent as sacrifices to that twisted devil," Tsunade replied, her voice showing obvious distaste. "You know how much Jiraiya and I would love nothing more than to see that son of a bitch tied to a spit and roasted over an open fire," her fist angrily hit the top of the desk causing papers to scatter to the ground. "That bastard betrayed us all years ago, even before Minato came to the precinct." Tsunade gritted her teeth, "Even so, this isn't what I wanted to talk to you about. What I'm getting at is…I want you two to take the kid to the safe house on Third and Ocean Avenue. You are to take the first day's watch. I have already informed Temari and Tenten that they shall be relieving you tomorrow morning. This is the first time someone was left alive at a 'red cloud' crime scene. Maybe they didn't even know the child was there, maybe they did. Right now, it is irrelevant. The child will be kept at the safe house until we locate the next of kin. Tomorrow you will report to Captain Kakashi. As an ex-member of the ANBU unit, I have given him lead on this case. I will also be placing a member of the ANBU on this as well. Furthermore, I have given Kakashi the freedom to choose one other team to work alongside you on this assignment. The choice is completely up to him."

Tsunade heaved a sigh and leaned back into her chair, "Kakashi will brief you on all the details tomorrow. Now, I want you two to go get everything this child may need while we wait for results. I have assigned Identification of the infant to Hinata. You two go get diapers, bottles, baby food and anything else a baby might need."

Naruto blinked, "You're joking, right?"

Tsunade narrowed her eyes at the blue eyed officer, "Do I look like I'm joking, brat?"

"Hn."

"I want you out of those uniforms and in plain clothes. You are to blend in with everyone while the kid is in your charge. Say that he is your nephew or cousin. Heck, you can even say he is yours if you want. The officers at the precinct who are not involved in the case will be briefed. All they are going to know is that a kid was found at a crime scene, and that we are watching him until we locate his next of kin. Understand?"

At that moment the phone rang. Grumbling under her breath Tsunade answered. She spoke to the person on the other line for a minute or so before hanging up.

"One more thing," she said, "The kid, according to Shizune seems to be around the age of 6-7 months. Make sure to get the appropriate equipment."

"Wouldn't it be better if one of the girls went to go shopping?" Naruto whined.

Sasuke could not agree more, however his face revealed no such notion.

"They're all busy," Tsunade folded her arms, daring the blond to question her further. Naruto furrowed his eyebrows at the Chief and mumbled something incoherent under his breath.

"Here's the key."

Tsunade threw a single key in Naruto's direction. He caught it skillfully with his right hand, a small smile playing across his features. Sasuke's eye rolling did not escape Naruto's notice. The younger man stealthily jabbed his partner in the rib. The raven grunted.

"Make sure to pick up the kid before you head out," Tsunade called at the retreating forms, "Shizune is waiting for you downstairs in the medical department!"

Naruto turned around, "We're taking the kid with us?"

"No you're taking him out for a stroll," The blonde woman snapped, "Of course you are!"

Naruto was just about to say something when Sasuke grabbed him by the scruff of the neck and dragged him out of Tsunade's office. The Chief smirked at their disappearing forms.

Once they were gone, she had resigned herself to the heaps of paperwork piled up high on her desk. _It's always fun watching those two fight their silent little battles when they think no one is paying attention_, she thought as she signed her name on a request form ordering the latest edition of forensic software.

:::

"He did have a light fever, but that all pertained to the teething," Shizune stroked the infant's silky black hair, "I gave him something for it so it should go down in half an hour or so. I've also fed the little guy some formula," Shizune cooed, "Had Hinata run down to the local pharmacy and get some."

Naruto nodded as Shizune carefully handed the kid over to him. The blond pressed the infant close to his chest and watched as the small boy shoved his little finger into his mouth. It did not take long for the tiny hand to be completely covered in drool. Naruto shifted the 'drooler' further from his face.

"I ran the usual check up and he seems to be doing fine. Like I told Tsunade before, he seems to fit within the 5-7 month age range. Teething usually starts at around six months, sometimes a little earlier," Shizune muffled a chuckle as the infant reached out his slobbered hand and grabbed hold of Naruto's hoodie. The blond winced as he felt the fabric soak in the warm, wet drool. "Make sure to keep an eye on him at all times. This little guy is quite the roller."

"And quite the slobberer," Naruto looked at Sasuke, "Wanna hold him?"

"No."

The blond sighed and listened quietly to the rest of the information Shizune was offering to them. He nodded when she mentioned that the kid would probably keep them up all night, and frowned when she told them he would need bathing. Naruto hoped that the bathing could wait for tomorrow so the girls could do it.

When the baby lesson was over, Sasuke lead the way out the door and to the cruiser. Naruto's attention was centered on keeping the drool-filled fingers far away from his face. He was so concentrated on his task that he almost walked into Lieutenant Instructor Iruka Umino carrying a stack of papers. The tan skinned officer side stepped the blond and frowned when he saw the baby his former student was holding.

"Hope that isn't yours."

Naruto looked up and blushed crimson, "NO!"

"In order for the kid to be his, Naruto would have had to get laid," Kankuro smirked. He leaned against the water cooler, enjoying how his friend's face turned a darker shade of red as all the blood rushed to his face.

Naruto glared at the full faced officer, "Shut up."

"Dobe," Sasuke looked bored as he stood in the hallway. He eyed his fellow officers and gave each a nod in acknowledgement.

"What are you doing here anyway, Iruka?" Naruto asked, dodging a spit covered finger in the process.

"I'm here to drop off all the applications for the Academy."

"Is Konohamaru applying?" Naruto asked.

Iruka nodded, "So are his friends Udon and Moegi."

Naruto smiled, remembering how the three high school students would follow him around, asking about all the different training he was getting.

They were already in their senior year…how time flies.

"They're all applicants for next year?"

"That's right," Iruka nodded, "Chief Tsunade has to look over every application and select sixteen lucky candidates who will get to train for the Special Unit. After four years of rigorous training, hard work and the final examination, they will come join your ranks at this precinct."

"This is all great," Sasuke said, "But we have work to do." The raven bowed, "It was nice seeing you Iruka," he straightened up and made his way towards the door.

"Yeah," Naruto sighed, "We have to go shopping."

Kankuro stifled a laugh while Iruka just smiled. The two waved their goodbyes at the pair before getting back to work.

Sasuke drove into the parking lot of the largest department store in Konoha. The six-story edifice towered proudly over the rest of the nearby buildings, the white brick glistening with every ray of sunlight.

The October weather was unseasonably warm and Sasuke found himself enjoying the light breeze blowing soothingly against his face. The serenity of it all was cut short however, when Naruto hollered loudly in his ear.

"Sasuke we need to get a cart! I'm not holding this slobbering mess the whole time!"

And the moment was ruined.

"Well then get a cart, dobe."

"I can't get a cart and hold the kid away from my face at the same time!" He whined.

"Fine. I'll get it," Sasuke growled, walking towards the entrance. It didn't take long to find the line of carts huddled under a makeshift roof. He pulled at one of the metal contraptions only to have six of the carts come out. He glared at the extra baggage.

"Hn."

"Bastard, just grab the one with the baby seat!"

Sasuke turned one ebony eye at his partner before pulling loose the one and only cart with a baby seat. He wheeled it over and let Naruto fuss over the damned thing.

"Hey Sasuke, I think this one's broken."

"Then I guess you'll just have to carry him," Sasuke walked into the store before the blond could utter a single word.

Naruto cursed at no one in particular and grabbed one of the metal carts with one hand before rushing through the automatic doors right after Sasuke. The raven was waiting by the elevator with his hands deep inside grey jean pockets. His blue button down shirt sat comfortably on his elegant frame, a sliver of his white cotton shirt was visible right at the collarbone.

"Hey, Bastard," Naruto shoved the cart at his partner and watched it wheel quite hazardously across the polished floor, "You're on cart patrol."

"Hn."

The light above the elevator turned green and the metallic doors slid open. Sasuke pushed the cart effortlessly inside and waited for Naruto to get in before pushing the button for the third floor. The blond watched the red digital numbers change. He had been in this place over a hundred times but he had never been to the third floor. When the shiny metal doors opened, Naruto found himself staring at a ten-foot tall plastic baby in a diaper.

Sasuke wheeled their cart out and made his way to the first aisle. He silently groaned at all gadgets hanging off the walls. There were bibs, pacifiers, and books…lots and lots of books. There were colorful books with cartoon animals and pop out books with princesses and dragons. All the way at the end of the aisle was a section of books dedicated to parents. Sasuke stopped his cart and moved it to the side, staring intently at the wall of self-help books. The raven heaved a sigh of relief when his eyes focused on a shelf devoted to first time dads. He read over the titles, _'Baby Tips for Dads,' 'Daddy 101,' 'Dummies Guide to Fatherhood,'_ Sasuke reached out and grabbed a purple covered book entitled, _The Male Guide to Baby Rearing. _He opened to the first chapter and began to read. A few minutes later, the infamous Uchiha smirk was in place and Sasuke looked up from his reading only to realize that the Dobe was nowhere to be found. Grumbling, he wheeled the cart out of his aisle and began looking for a mop of blonde hair.

Naruto had fixated himself on one specific category.

Food.

Mainly one type of food.

Baby food.

His mouth hung open as his eyes raked in all the different flavors of mush stacked in perfect little rows on the shelves. There were hundreds of little jars with smiling babies plastered onto them. Naruto scrunched his nose at one jar containing some sickly green ick he later found out was supposed to taste like peas. There was some orange mush that apparently was carrot and some yellowish orangey mush that was squash. Naruto stopped at one specific jar of mush. This one was a pale yellow color and was labeled _ramen_. The blond took the jar off the shelf and peered at it closely, not even noticing how the little guy in his arms grabbed a hold of the string attached to his orange hoodie and put it in his mouth.

Naruto was very curious. He wanted to know if the stuff inside the jar really tasted like ramen. He stared at the glass jar, wondering if he should buy it and taste it later. However, he was violently jolted from his thoughts when a pale hand grabbed his hood and gave it a good yank. The orange cord flew out of the baby's mouth and slapped the blond in the face. Naruto let out a stream of curses as he fumbled with the glass jar, trying to get a good grip. Sasuke pulled the jar out of his partner's bumbling fingers and placed it back on the shelf, shaking his head.

"We're shopping for the kid, not you," Sasuke sighed, reading the label on the jar, "Ramen flavored?"

"Apparently."

"Hn," Sasuke changed his mind and put the jar into the cart, "I'll give you five bucks if you eat it."

Naruto snickered, he was going to taste it anyway, might as well make some profit, "Deal."

Sasuke nodded, "I called Tsunade. She said she'll reimburse us tomorrow when we come in."

"Well what do we need to get?" Naruto asked.

Sasuke motioned for the Dobe to follow. Soon they were filling the cart with items left and right. From one aisle came the diapers, disposable baby wipes, rubbing alcohol, cotton swabs and a changing pad. Sasuke read off the list of baby essentials while Naruto ran and threw everything they needed into the cart.

The Uchiha quickly found himself holding the kid while Naruto scampered off to grab the diaper rash ointment. In only a matter of seconds, Sasuke found himself dodging a drool stained fist reaching for a lock of his ebony black hair.

"No," he stared pointedly into small blue eyes, daring the child to grab for his hair again. Astonishingly, the infant stopped reaching for the black spikes and started happily sucking on his own fist. Naruto came back and chucked the plastic bottle into the cart.

"Now what?"

Sasuke looked into the purple book, "We need terry cloth bath towels, washcloths, tearless shampoo, rounded-tip nail scissors, a brush and a bathtub."

The blond nodded and ran off towards the aisle marked 'bath time' while repeating the list of things Sasuke had said under his breath. Sighing, the Uchiha pushed the cart forwards and stopped it right next to the entryway of the 'bath time' aisle. Naruto was soon throwing things in one after another. It took them a good portion of an hour to get everything they needed. When they were done, Sasuke had deviously managed to hand Naruto back the drooling ball of horror.

The raven managed to get into one of the shorter lines and was now waiting patiently to pay for what he was sure going to cost him an arm and a leg.

He began pilling all the baby things onto the conveyer belt. One of the employees had already brought over the box containing the unassembled crib and placed it near the redheaded cashier woman who was staring at Sasuke bashfully. Naruto's attention had been completely captivated by the assortment of candies displayed on his right-hand side, so he was completely obscured from the cashier's line of sight.

"I hope you found everything well," the redhead's voice made Sasuke cringe internally.

"Hn."

"Being a single dad is rough," she gave her shoulder length hair a flick, "If you need any help, you can just give me a call. I'm great with kids." She grabbed a paper and Sasuke inwardly flinched when he saw her scrawl down a number.

"Dobe!"

Naruto's head snapped up from examining a chocolate coated pack of almonds. He sighed and trudged over to where Sasuke was standing. He threw his rival a 'what do you want' look.

"Hello," the cashier woman called to the blond.

"Hey," Naruto smiled at the blushing woman, "I'm sorry you have to deal with this guy. He can be such a pain in the ass at times."

"N-no it's alright," she glanced at Sasuke then at Naruto, "Are you two brothers?" She asked hopefully.

Sasuke wondered if this might have been the woman who got locked in her own car.

"No," Naruto said as he shifted the kid in his arms, "He's my partner."

"Oh," she frowned regretfully, "It's always the cute ones that end up being gay. N-not that I have a-anything against g-gay people! I have lots of gay friends!"

"I'm not gay!" Naruto shook his head fiercely, "W-we work together! I- look, we are co-OW!"

Naruto threw a dirty look in Sasuke's direction. The raven motioned to the infant curled into Naruto's chest and the blond suddenly remembered. His expression slackened as he ran a hand threw his unruly blonde hair rather nervously.

"B-being g-g-gay is h-hard," Naruto stammered, "I-it my butt hurts."

Sasuke's eye twitched.

Naruto prayed that the floor would open up and swallow him whole.

The raven gritted his teeth and signed his name on the receipt before grabbing the blond by the scruff of his neck, and pulling him towards the elevator. The freckled employee who had brought the crib was hurrying behind them wheeling the cart full of baby accessories.

When they were ten feet from their cruiser, Sasuke realized that it would probably be a bad idea if the teenage employee saw their police car, so he thanked the teenage worker and took to wheeling the cart the rest of the way himself. After everything was packed into the car (the crib box had gone in the backseat) the two officers got into their cruiser. Once Naruto had buckled in, Sasuke hit the blond hard over the head.

"My butt hurts?"

"What did you want me to say?" Naruto glared, rubbing the back of his skull.

"Anything else would have sufficed!"

"It's the first thing that popped into my head!" Naruto retorted, "I'm not gay, so what was I supposed to say?"

"Why did you have to say anything?"

"B-because!"

"Hn."

After a few minutes of awkward car silence, Naruto finally spoke, "How about we forget about it and never go to the third floor ever again?"

"Sounds good to me, dobe."

They reached the safe house a little after two. Naruto had become the designated baby holder, albeit unhappily. They walked into the four room residence grudgingly. Sasuke flipped the light switch and grunted as he lowered the four heavy bags to the floor. He returned to the car to get the rest of their packages as Naruto examined the interior of the safe house.

Once everything was inside, Sasuke pulled out a silvery car cover from the trunk of the cruiser and covered the police vehicle. He fiddled with the waterproof fabric for a few minutes, making sure that anything that screamed 'police' was well hidden. When he was satisfied, he turned around and headed back inside only to be greeted by a bout of screaming and crying.

Naruto was trying his best to stop the ungodly racket spewing from the infant's mouth but it was to no avail. He tried rocking sideways, up and down, twirling, humming and yelling but nothing was working.

"Sasuke!" Naruto cried, "I can't make it stop!"

The raven massaged his temples, trying to keep his temper in check. If he lashed out now, things would only get worse. He dug inside one of the bags for the purple baby book that had proved very helpful during their shopping dilemma. He found it sitting in the plastic bag under the changing pad. Quickly he began leafing through the pages, searching for something that would enlighten them and help stop the banshee like wails. His eyes landed on a page dedicated to his predicament,_ Dad Don't Fret, Crying Ain't a Sweat_.

"He might be hungry," he said.

"Alright," Naruto paused, "Who's going to feed him?"

"We'll both do it," Sasuke said as he read on, "It seems like a tedious process."

Naruto nodded his head. A small finger hit the side of his face, scratching the sun kissed under chin. The blond cringed and moved the child farther away from his face. A plump little foot hit him in the jaw. He cursed.

"I'm going to mix the formula, you keep your eye on him," Sasuke ordered.

"Why can't I mix the formula?" Naruto whined.

"You'll mess it up."

"I will not!"

"Just watch the kid, dobe!"

Sasuke rummaged in the plastic bags looking for the formula and a set of bottles. When he found them, he walked as fast as he could into the kitchenette so he could get away from the two screaming males. He propped the purple book on the counter and began reading. _One scoop of powdered formula makes two ounces of formula. Depending on the type you are using, you either will need leveled scoops or rounded scoops. Most formulas ask for packed level scoops of the powder. You can use a knife or any other utensil to level it out. _Sasuke stared at the rounded scoop in his hand. Quickly he ran his finger over the top, leveling it. He did not have the time to go searching for a damned knife!_ You will dump the scooped formula into the water in your bottle. If you are trying to make four ounces of formula, you need to have two scoops of powder._ Shit, Sasuke looked at his empty bottle. He needed water. Throwing the scoop into the formula tin, he went foraging for a bottle of water. A blood curdling scream rang out from the hallway.

Sasuke wasn't sure whether it was the baby or his miserable partner.

Finding the cursed water bottle, he ran back to the counter and proceeded following the directions. He added four ounces of water then dumped the leveled scoops of powder into the bottle._ Why the hell am I doing this?_ Sasuke groaned, _I never signed up for baby duty!_ He read on, _powdered formula will clump, don't worry dad its normal. You can stir the powder and help it mix with the water, once the powder is completely mixed; you are ready to feed your child._ Sasuke glared at the bottle. He did not have anything to mix it with so just shaking it would have to do. He grabbed the bottle, pinching the rubber closed and began to shake it while making his way to the howling infant.

"Sit him up in your lap," Sasuke motioned for Naruto to take a seat in a chair. The blond did so quickly and positioned the crying child in a sitting position on his lap.

Sasuke bent down so he was at eye level with the wriggling kid, "Hey," he shook the bottle in front of the infant. Tiny tear filled eyes opened and widened upon seeing the bottle. Little hands reached out while the banshee continued to wail. Sasuke shoved the bottle into the kid's mouth.

Quiet.

Naruto had never been so thankful for silence in his entire life.

The infant suckled the bottle, holding it with its tiny hands. Sasuke maintained a firm grip on it with his right hand, his left rested atop the blonde's thigh to keep himself balanced. Naruto heaved a sigh of relief as Sasuke tipped the bottle so the child could get at more of the formula. It didn't take long for the infant to suck the bottle dry. Removing the bottle from the infant's mouth, Sasuke stood up. The little boy yawned.

"Put him to sleep," Sasuke said.

Naruto looked around, "Where? The crib isn't set up yet."

Sasuke walked over to the plastic bags that were still sitting by the front of the door. He searched through them, coming up with a bunch of blankets and towels. He laid them out on the carpeted floor and looked over at his partner. The blond sighed and nodded his head. The infant made a noise and Naruto's head snapped towards it, hoping they were not about to hear a repeat of the nerve racking performance. Sky blue eyes looked up at him, a toothless smile played on rosy red cheeks.

"You know, he isn't so bad when he's quiet," Naruto murmured.

"Don't start on that," Sasuke warned.

"I'm not," Naruto rolled his eyes, "Damn bastard, just because I make one lousy comment doesn't mean I'm getting attached, prick."

"Just making sure, dobe." Sasuke stood with the empty bottle in his hand, "We need to get started on assembling the crib."

"Yeah, I know," Naruto began rocking the child in his arms.

It didn't take long for the blond to get the little guy to fall asleep. Tenderly, he laid the sleeping babe onto the layers of towels and blankets on the floor. The infant curled up on the blanket, thumb still in its mouth. Naruto smiled and gently covered the sleeping baby with a blue blanket. He went over to the plastic bags and trying to make as little amount of noise as possible, looked for the baby monitors. Upon finding them, he plugged one into the wall a few feet away from his sleeping charge and then proceeded to enter the room where Sasuke was busy at work assembling the crib. He plugged the other monitor into the wall and turned it on. Red lights flickered, moving with every breath that it detected the child in the other room taking.

An hour into their rigorous backbreaking labor, Naruto's phone vibrated. The blond was surprised to hear Sakura's voice on the other line.

"Hey, the Chief asked Ino and me to bring you guys something to eat." She chirped happily, "I made you guys bentos!"

"Thanks, Sakura!" Naruto grinned into the phone, "I love your bentos!"

"Is Sasuke there?"

"Yeah, he's busy," Sasuke nodded his head as he tried to quietly hammer in a nail, "Do you want me to meet up with you and grab the lunches?"

"No, it's alright we'll come to you."

Naruto looked at Sasuke and mouthed 'she wants to come here.' The raven shook his head. There was no way that girl was stepping one foot in here…if she did, she would never leave.

Naruto laughed nervously into the phone, "Ah…do you mind if I meet you at the Hokage's Water Fountain? I think it would be faster that way."

"Can't Sasuke come and pick it up then?"

Naruto narrowed his eyes, "No. He's busy. I'll meet you in ten minutes."

"Oh alright, see ya."

"Bye."

Naruto slammed his phone closed, gritting his teeth.

"Why do you like that girl?" Sasuke asked curiously, his voice quiet.

Naruto sighed. A tan hand nervously ran through his golden yellow hair, "Because she's smart and brave _and_ pretty."

Sasuke shook his head, a sliver of a smile evident on his face, "Then why don't you just ask her out already?"

"Bastard, every time I try, _you_ manage to somehow screw it up for me."

"Hn," Sasuke rolled his eyes, "Honestly, I think you could do better."

"Is that a compliment?" Azure eyes met obsidian.

"Dobe," Sasuke lifted part of the wooden frame and flipped it over, "I just think you're settling for her. She is somewhat attractive and no doubt she's a good officer, but she's obsessive and moronic."

"You're just saying that because she likes you."

"No, it's the truth. If I could somehow make her leave me alone, believe me I would do so in a heartbeat."

"You secretly love all the attention she gives you," Naruto crossed his arms, "Or else she wouldn't still be hanging on your every word."

"Idiot," Sasuke shook his head again, an angry glint in his eye, "You should know me better than that."

Noise came from the baby monitor and the two officers froze. Both watched the red dots on the device disappear.

Collectively they side in relief.

False alarm.

"You're going to be late," Sasuke said.

Naruto looked at the time displayed on his cell phone and cursed. He ran quietly out of the room and grabbed the car keys off the shelf.

:::

"Sasuke he's not taking the damn bottle!" Naruto squeezed his eyes shut as a spray of formula hit him in the face.

"Did you try burping him?" Sasuke read from his book, his face showing no outwards signs of turmoil. Inside however, was a completely different story. The howling was getting louder and he didn't know how much more of this he could take.

"Yes, damn it!"

"Maybe he's got gas?"

"No, I've rubbed his tummy the last time you mentioned that one!"

"Are you sure he's not hungry?"

"Fuck!" Naruto dodged a drool stained fist as the baby pushed the bottle away with its foot, "Yes I'm sure!"

"Hn," Sasuke turned the page and read down the rest of the list, "Have you checked his diaper?"

Naruto cringed, "No."

"Maybe he needs to be changed?"

"I don't know how to change a diaper!" Naruto wailed, panic setting in.

Sasuke flipped through his book, looking for anything that could help them change the little devil's diaper. His eyes landed on two paragraphs that seemed to have been god sent.

"Dobe," Sasuke grabbed the changing pad and a few diapers out of the plastic bags and headed for the bedroom, "Follow me."

Naruto carried the flailing and shrieking child into the bedroom and laid him down on the mattress while Sasuke assembled everything they would need.

"Alright put him on here."

Naruto shifted the child onto the changing pad. The two men looked at each other and took deep breaths. Together, they huddled over the crying infant. Sasuke read the first few lines and sighed.

"Alright, open the diaper."

"Me?" Naruto glared, "Why not you?"

"Because I'm reading the directions," Sasuke said quickly.

Grumbling, the blond gingerly undid the diaper. His nose wrinkled in disgust at the putrid smell. Brown poop was smeared all over the place, "I think I'm going to be sick."

"Using baby wipes, gently wipe your baby clean from the front to the back," Sasuke read and handed Naruto a box of baby wipes. The blond stared at the raven incredulously.

"You must be out of your mind if you think that _I'm_ going to get anywhere near _that_!" He snapped.

"I fed him," Sasuke glared, "You change him."

"Fuck NO! I fed him too, and I put the little shit to sleep!"

Sasuke rolled his eyes, "I'll put him to sleep next, just clean him up."

Naruto gritted his teeth and grabbed the baby wipes, "Fine," he looked at the mess that awaited him and whimpered. Carefully, he lifted the infant's foot so he could wipe up the warm brown gunk coating the kid's bottom.

"Don't forget the creases in the thighs and buttocks," Sasuke read.

"Shove it," Naruto glared.

Sasuke lowered his book down on the mattress and read on, his eyes widened slightly, "Hey dobe I think you-"

"AH!" Naruto jerked the kid's leg in Sasuke's direction. A stream of urine hit the raven squarely in the face, soaking his front. Sasuke grabbed Naruto by his hood and pulled the blond in front of himself. Naruto got a face full of urine, the warm yellow liquid quickly being absorbed by the orange fabric. The blond wriggled out of Sasuke's hold gasping and cursing colorfully. The snot nosed brat lying naked on the bed found this all quite hilarious. A giggle escaped from the not so innocent child.

The two officers looked murderous.

Sasuke picked up his book and began to read through clenched teeth, "For baby boys it's a good idea to keep a clean diaper over the penis during changing because exposure to the air often causes boys to urinate…on you, the walls, or anything else within range."

"Bastard," Naruto was ready to kill the Uchiha, "You couldn't read that part earlier?"

"Hn," Sasuke stood, the vein on his forehead throbbing dangerously, "Once you have finished, pat your baby dry with a clean washcloth and apply diaper ointment."

Naruto angrily finished diapering the baby and tossed the soiled diaper at Sasuke. The Uchiha caught the warm white diaper and threw it in the trash while Naruto placed the baby into the now assembled crib. He lifted the side and trapped the infant inside.

"Sit," he ordered. The kid looked up at him and smiled. Little blue eyes landed on the assortment of colorful toys inside and lost complete interest in his two caretakers.

Sasuke pulled at his blue pee stained shirt and sighed. It was lucky for him that he bought a few white t-shirts when they were in the department store.

"Ugh, I stink," Naruto frowned.

"I'm going to take a shower," Sasuke said as he approached the bathroom door.

"I want to shower too!"

"You can shower after me," he replied.

"Can't we just shower together?" Naruto threw off his orange hoodie and shot a glare in the kid's direction.

Sasuke stopped walking and turned around to face his partner, "We haven't done that since we were eight years old."

"I know," Naruto sighed, "But I'm covered in piss and I'm tired."

Sasuke smirked, "I'll be fast."

"Why can't I just shower with you?" The blond complained.

"Because," Sasuke opened the door, "The shower is small, we wouldn't have enough room. Besides, we're too old to shower together."

"Fine then," Naruto surrendered, "Just hurry up. I'm going to throw my shit in the laundry, want me to take your stuff too?"

Sasuke nodded and unbuttoned his shirt and pulled off his white undershirt and tossed them over to Naruto. The blond caught them and made his way towards the kitchen where he had spotted a small washing machine earlier. The raven watched his rival go, his eyes softening as a memory of the two of them splashing in a bathtub flooded his mind.

It was after one of their stupid games he recalled. Who ever made the most mud balls got to be the winner. You could steal your friend's mud balls but then he could steal them back. It was such a stupid game, but it was fun. Sasuke couldn't quite remember who the winner had been, but he remembered his mother yelling at them for tracking mud into the living room. She had rushed the two of them into the bathroom, stripping them naked and throwing them into the bath muttering about 'germs' and 'dirt.'

Sasuke shook his head, clearing his mind before walking into the bathroom.

No one could have prepared the two special unit officers for what was to come during the night. There was constant screaming, diaper changing, feeding, rocking and praying to god for morning to arrive. The two men took shifts, one would attempt at taking care of the little monster while the other got a much needed break on the green lumpy couch. At certain intervals, both men could be seen sitting on the sofa, barely conscious, each enjoying the few minutes of peace and quiet. Then, the damned yelling would start all over again. Naruto would nudge Sasuke to get up when it was his turn and the raven would do the same. Who knew teething could be such a pain in the ass? Around four in the morning, the little brat finally fell asleep.

Naruto was sitting on the couch, leaning heavily on the armrest. Sasuke fell down beside him, his eyes bloodshot.

"I'm so tired," the blond mumbled sleepily.

"Hn."

"We should go to bed," Naruto said, however he made no attempt to get up.

"Hn."

"Good idea," Naruto nodded, "I was thinking of staying here too."

:::

Temari and Tenten drove their cruiser up to the safe house located on Third and Ocean Ave at eight o'clock in the morning. The brunette yawned as she stepped out of the car, her hand reaching into her jean pocket in search for the key.

"Help me get the car cover on," Temari called from behind the cruiser. Tenten nodded and helped her partner mask the vehicle with a silvery sheet. Once the car was properly covered, the girls headed for the house. Tenten quietly unlocked the door and Temari walked inside. The brunette grumbled when the key got stuck in the door. It took her a good few hard yanks to get the stubborn thing out. When she finally did, the female officer closed the door behind her only to stop short. Temari let out a chuckle as her camera phone snapped a photo.

"I'm so sending this to Kakashi," she grinned evilly.

"Oh send it to me too!" Tenten said, "I'm going to send it to Neji!"

"They are so going to kill us when they find out," the blonde woman smirked as she pushed the 'send' button on her phone.

"Hm," Tenten giggled, "If they find out."

"Do you think we should wake them?"

"No…let's give them a few more minutes to snuggle." Tenten stifled a laugh.

Sasuke and Naruto lay curled up on the green couch. The Uchiha had been pressed up against the back cushions, his left hand lay draped over Naruto's chest. The blonde's right leg and arm were dangling off the sofa. His head resting half on the armrest, half on Sasuke's other arm. Sasuke had trapped the blonde's left leg between his own two legs. The two of them lay pressed close together with innocent expressions on their faces.

Temari smiled deviously, noting the nearly inexistent distance between the two faces.

They would definitely kill them if they found out. She just had to make sure that these two never ever did.

Ever.

* * *

**Well I hope this chapter has left you satisfied.**

**I used the online Dictionary For Dads as my reference for all things baby.**

**Review and Fav!**

**Smartcat**


	4. The Red Cloud

**There were a few changes made to this chapter, so if you have read it before (a year ago) I suggest you read it again. Those of you who are reading it for the first time, I hope you enoy!**

* * *

Chapter 4: The Red Cloud

Sasuke's eyes flickered open as the sweet aromatic scent of coffee wafted through the air. The young officer burrowed his face into his pillow with a grumble.

Mornings for the Uchiha were considered to be the devil's work.

Sasuke tightened his hold on the pillow in his grasp only to be startled by a rather loud snort. Eyes snapped open only to find a rather sun kissed face mere centimeters away from his own.

He blinked.

What lay in his arms was definitely _not_ a pillow.

Naruto was sleeping soundly curled into his arms; lips parted slightly letting little puffs of warm air travel the short distance to caress the Uchiha's face.

At a pace snails would be jealous of, Sasuke lifted his head, hearing a crackle as he did so while the joints in his neck realigned. Blinking rather furiously he attempted to remove the arm Naruto had taken to use as a pillow. As he withdrew it he flexed his fingers and let out a low growl when blood flow was restored back to his arms shooting him with the much disliked pin and needlelike sensation.

In the traditional Uchiha fashion, Sasuke analyzed his situation before panic could grip at his throat. Breathing in through his nose he told himself to maintain calm and not to make any sudden movements.

All he had to do was disentangle his legs from the blonde's _very_ carefully. The moron had somehow weaved their limbs together during the night…or well…maybe he had done that…he wasn't sure…

Mustering his resolve the Uchiha inhaled a deep breath before glancing at the sleeping visage of his partner. As he was about to move, the blonde's leg jerked in his sleep and accidently rubbed against his crotch. Sasuke's eyes widened as he froze, his whole body trembling from the pleasurable tremor running through his groin. He swallowed a groan and without thinking rubbed himself against the blonde's leg. Another pleasing tremor coursed through his body causing his eyes to close. God, that felt really good. A dull throb began to echo through his lower extremities as he continued to silently grind his arousal against Naruto's leg. At that precise moment his partner decided to move again, his arm coming to swat against the pale Uchiha's face.

Sasuke stilled.

What the fuck was he doing?

Before his body could betray him further, Sasuke flung himself over the couch landing quite ungracefully to the floor below. Jumping to his feet he quickly chanced a glance at his partner and sighed. Relief flooded through him in waves as Naruto continued to sleep, his expression remaining free of emotion.

Clearing his throat, Sasuke straightened his clothes and then proceeded to stare angrily at his erection. As if feeling the infamous Uchiha glare, the tent in his pants suddenly disappeared letting Sasuke freely walk into the kitchen. Inside he found Tenten and Temari already sitting at the small table drinking coffee.

"Good morning, Sasuke," Temari smiled deviously, "Comfy couch?"

"Hn."

Not looking either woman in the eye, he grabbed his things and walked determinedly to the bathroom, stripping himself of all clothes once inside. Turning on the water the raven haired Uchiha stepped into the shower and let the scalding stream hit his back as he lathered up a block of soap.

_What had that been earlier? In fact, how was that even possible? _Sasuke growled as he scrubbed vigorously at his skin. He'd never been one to speculate about his own sexuality but he was damn well surprised that his body had reacted…to Naruto of all people, his best friend! Growling low in his throat he thought back to his previous interactions with the blonde that had resulted in him reacting in a way he was fairly certain he shouldn't.

The kiss at the ramen shop…

Jiraiya's place…

God, was he gay?

Turning his head up, he let the water wash over his face as he rubbed his scalp.

Naruto had always been able to extract the most insane responses from him, even when they were little…maybe…maybe he really _was_ gay…ugh, if the blackmail Kakashi and Jiraiya had was anything to go by…

Damn it…he just had to keep it cool…

…no jumping to conclusions about his sexuality…

…wait a bit…test waters…

Maybe this was all just a fluke? His body aching for attention?

"Argh," Sasuke slapped his face, "Damn it!"

Finishing off his shower, Sasuke quickly stepped out and put on some clothes before heading to the kitchen.

Sticking his head inside, he nodded to both women. "I'm going to wake the idiot."

Before either of them could say anything, Sasuke grabbed a cup of coffee and whisked out of the room, heading towards the green living room couch.

His mouth quirked upwards slightly when he spotted Naruto still sleeping soundly, arms and legs spread out now that he had more room. Bending down by the foot of the couch, the Uchiha took a sip of coffee before speaking softly. "Dobe."

No response.

"Dobe," he said a little louder.

Still no movement.

With a low growl, Sasuke pinched Naruto's arm hard. The blonde let out a yelp, snapping up into a sitting position almost instantaneously.

"Get up."

"Bastard," Naruto nursed his arm giving his partner a retched look, "Can't you wake me up like a normal person?"

"Hn."

"Ass wipe."

Growling, Sasuke straightened up and headed back to the kitchen. "Get ready, idiot."

Muttering some incoherent nonsense under his breath Naruto stood from the couch and stomped towards the kitchen to get his things. As soon as he walked through the doorway he was assaulted by a strong hand to the back of his head.

"Fuck!" Naruto hissed, hands flying to the back of his head to ease the throbbing. "What the hell, Sasuke?"

"Hn."

Naruto turned to the two female officers and grouched, "See what I have to put up with? I've barely been awake for five minutes and he's already abusing me!"

"Hurry up, dobe."

"Fuck off, bastard!"

Temari and Tenten sighed simultaneously. This was what they were used to.

"Naruto," Sasuke growled. The blonde stuck out his tongue before running out of the kitchen and into the bathroom. A few minutes later they heard the water running.

:::

"Good morning, boys," Kakashi said cheerfully as both Sasuke and Naruto entered the precinct, "I'm sure you had a pleasant night."

Naruto grumbled something incoherent while Sasuke just glared venomous daggers at the masked officer.

"I'm guessing you're anxious to start on this case?"

"You better believe it!" Naruto nodded vehemently.

Kakashi scratched the back of his head, "You sure are enthusiastic, Naruto."

"Yeah well," he shrugged, "I've been itching to do some serious work since I got here."

"Before we start, there's someone I need to introduce you to." Kakashi visibly took a deep breath as he began walking down the hallway. _Tsunade must be a very vengeful woman to do this to me_.

Kakashi thought of the probability of this meeting going well.

Unfortunately, the numbers were not in his favor.

They walked down the precinct halls and stopped by an oak door with the number 213 stamped into it in bold black lettering. As Kakashi let them in, Naruto examined its contents.

Everything in the place was damn well organized. Papers on the desk were neatly placed in files and a small tree no bigger than Naruto's hand was sitting in a pot in the corner. Behind the desk sat a man with light brown hair. He wore the customary uniform although, at the moment, he was sporting a wireless headset. When the man saw them enter, he tied up his conversation and took off his headpiece.

"Boys, I'd like you to meet Yamato."

"I've never seen you before," Naruto said thoughtfully. He knew almost every officer here at the precinct.

"That's because," the man stood, "I work in ANBU."

Naruto's mouth opened slightly as he stared at officer before him. Immediately both he and Sasuke bowed their heads out of respect.

"You two never treated me this way," Kakashi frowned, "I worked in ANBU too!"

"Yeah," Naruto straightened and looked squarely at his captain, "That's because you're a pervert."

"Hn." Sasuke wordlessly agreed.

"Ah," Kakashi nodded in understanding, "Valid point."

"Gaara and Kankuro should be here soon," Yamato stated, "I'm assuming you want to meet Sai?"

"Yes."

"Very well then," Yamato pressed a button concealed under his desk and a split second later, a door opened in the wall and out stepped a dark haired young man with skin even paler than Sasuke's. Pitch black eyes scanned over the occupants in the room before he turned and bowed his head to Yamato.

"This is Sai," Kakashi said, "He is a member of the ANBU and will be assisting us on this case along with Major Yamato and his team."

"It is nice to meet you," Sai said to Naruto and Sasuke. He smiled at the two boys and instantly Naruto felt chills run up and down his spine. Sasuke's face however, remained impassive.

"Hello, Sai," Naruto pushed down his unease and stretched out his hand, "I'm Naruto. The ass over here is Sasuke." He motioned with his head to the side.

Sai took Naruto's hand and shook it, the eerie smile not wavering, "You have very soft hands." He turned to Sasuke. "Your lover is very appealing to the eye."

"WHAT?" Naruto withdrew his hand as if scorched by fire while all Kakashi could do was blink. Sasuke's eyebrows drew upwards but other than that, he remained quiet, wondering how Naruto would take care of the situation. No doubt his partner would make it more interesting.

Sai tilted his head and stepped closer to the blonde, reaching behind him and squeezing his ass, "Oh…very nice…firm…"

"MOTHER FUCKING SON OF A BITCH!"

Naruto's face went redder than a fire truck. However, before he could lunge and completely throttle the smiling individual, Kakashi grabbed him.

"Naruto, calm down!"

"FUCK NO! I JUST GOT GROPED LIKE A WOMAN!" Naruto yelled, "I AM _NOT_ A WOMAN! AND I AM _NOT_ GAY! I VERY MUCH _LIKE_ VAGINA!"

Yes…Naruto sure made life more interesting…

Sasuke watched as Sai turned his head to look at him. Unlike his proceedings with the blonde, Sai was very careful about approaching him. As they locked eyes, Sasuke made sure to let the other man know _exactly_…that he wasn't a man to be trifled with.

"It's nice to meet you, Sasuke." Sai stretched out his hand. Sasuke's glare intensified and the ANBU officer withdrew his hand. "I see."

A few minutes later Gaara and Kankuro joined them in the office but by this time, Naruto had cooled down to a degree. However, he kept a rather large distance between himself and the new member of the team.

"Well, let's get to the matter of things," Kakashi was all business now. "I was told to fill everyone in on the case we're going to be working."

The occupants of the room nodded and listened intently to everything the silver haired officer had to say.

"…We know little to nothing about who we're dealing with. What information we _did _manage to gather isn't very helpful. All we've got basically is that we know this organization has a member who has a surgical background and another member highly trained in explosives and trap setting. The one thing we're absolutely clear on is that they have dealings with Orochimaru." Kakashi rubbed his chin, "What I plan on doing is infiltrating Orochimaru's criminal ring and extracting as much intel as I can about the…organ robbers. As of now, we are not going after Orochimaru himself…only his stations that may have information stashed within them."

"So we're going to be infiltrating Orochimaru's safe houses," Naruto said in clarification.

Kakashi nodded. "Kurenai has asked me to come down to the morgue. I want you all to join me. You need to hear what she says as well."

The group nodded and followed behind Kakashi as he led them down to the morgue.

They found Kurenai busy buzzing around a body noting things on her clipboard. The medical examiner turned around when she heard footsteps approaching.

She smiled kindly at everyone before motioning them to follow her across the room where another body lay on a slab covered by a flimsy sheet. Kurenai lifted the white fabric and Naruto saw the face of the man they had found dead yesterday morning.

"We got a positive ID on the victim. This man is Akio Hayashi, twenty-six years old. As you can see, he has suffered many injuries to his abdominal area. Notice the severe cuts and abrasions on his arms, clear signs of self-defense." She held the cadaver's thighs apart and pointed to the man's more private regions. "His rectum and anus both suffered tears and what I thought had just been another faulty cut of the knife…" Kurenai sighed and looked up at the men in the room sadly, "This man had been sodomized. I found traces of semen on his buttocks and along his inner thighs…none of them his." Naruto's eyes widened as Kurenai continued with her medical analysis.

"What killed him?" Yamato asked.

"It is most likely he went into shock." She stated, "He was still alive when they cut into him. I'm afraid that this man had suffered a great deal before death finally took him."

"Those bastards," Naruto clenched his fists, "Why? Why do this?"

Kurenai looked at him sorrowfully and shook her head, "I don't know."

Kakashi cleared his throat, "Am I to assume the Chief has his file?"

Kurenai nodded.

"All right then, thank you, Kurenai." He turned his team of officers and spoke quietly, "I want everyone up in my office."

The group waited patiently by Kakashi's desk, waiting for him to return from Chief Tsunade. When he finally did, he held a grim expression on his face.

"Akio Hayashi, age twenty-six, father of Jiro Hayashi, age six months…and husband to Kyoko Hayashi, age twenty-three," he threw the file on his desk. "Kyoko has been dead for nearly two weeks…same M.O."

"Shit."

"A relative…an aunt from Iwagakure has been notified and will be arriving to take custody of Jiro Hayashi sometime next week," Kakashi said as he fiddled with his mask a bit, "The Chief has already requested Kyoko's files to be sent here. Now, I want you to map out the last few days of Akio's life. I want to know every detail, no matter how insignificant it may seem. I want every phone call placed, whom he talked to, where he went, what he ate. Everything."

Kakashi pointed at Gaara and Kankuro, "You two get on it immediately."

The two brothers nodded and left.

Kakashi turned his head to look at Naruto and Sasuke, "I want you two to do research on the red district. I want to know every place Orochimaru visited and how frequently. We need to find those safe houses. Sai, I want you to assist Gaara and Kankuro. Yamato and I are going to head to the prison ward. We'll see if any of Orochimaru's underlings know anything about this 'red cloud' organization."

Sasuke nodded his head in understanding and left the side of Kakashi's desk with Naruto falling quietly behind him. When they reached their shared office space, Naruto grabbed his phone and began dialing.

"Hey Tenten, its Naruto…no I didn't forget anything. Listen, the little guy's name is Jiro Hayashi just thought you'd like to know….no, his mother is dead. His aunt is coming over to pick him up sometime next week…because she lives in Iwagakure that's why! It's far, I bet she's trying to get here as soon as she can!...Oh that's okay. I'll talk to you later Tenten, Sasuke's glaring at me again." Hanging up, Naruto wrinkled his nose and looked at his partner. "What?"

"Hn."

"Go to hell!" He growled, "I am not getting attached!"

"Never said you were, dobe."

"You implied it!"

"Hn."

"Shut up," the blonde grumbled.

When lunchtime rolled around, Sasuke and Naruto decided to eat it at their desks. The blonde was scarfing down his cupped ramen while Sasuke regally chewed his sushi, holding his chopsticks as if they were made of gold.

The two of them were like day and night, different as the sun and moon yet…

"You got a noodle on your shirt, moron."

Naruto looked down at his shirt and indeed, he did. Without a second thought, he picked it up with his fingers and slipped it into his mouth.

"Thanks."

"Hn."

The door to the share office flung open and strolling in came Kiba with Shino following quietly behind him. In his hand the canine trainer held a brown paper bag. To his right, Shino had buried his face into his collar with only the dark lenses of his glasses visible.

"Hey, Naruto!"

"What's up, Kiba?" Naruto grinned as the two officers approached his desk. Kiba shrugged and threw his brown bag on the desk. The blonde wrinkled his nose at the unpleasant odor emitting from it.

"What the hell is in that?" Naruto pinched his nostrils closed with his fingers, "It smells awful."

"Goat cheese."

"Why?"

"Moron lost a bet," Shino smirked, sticking his nose out from behind his collar, "He's got to eat the whole thing now."

"Aren't you sensitive to smell, Kiba?" Sasuke asked. His unfinished sushi lay forgotten on the desk.

Kiba nodded, "If you don't breathe through your nose, you can't smell it. I've been breathing through my mouth for about an hour now."

Naruto took a deep breath through his mouth and exhaled. Inhaled then exhaled, "You're right! I can't smell it!"

Kiba's lips parted in a smile revealing rather sharpened canines, "Told you."

"That reminds me," Sasuke bent down and removed something from his bag. A split second later the ramen flavored baby food was sitting next to the goat cheese, "You got to eat it."

"Holy shit, is that baby food?" Kiba inspected the little glass jar, "Fuck! Its ramen flavored!"

"No problem, bastard," Naruto grinned, grabbing Sasuke by the shoulder and squeezing. "As long as I get my five bucks."

"You have to eat all of it," Sasuke reminded, handing Naruto a spoon.

The blonde waved him off, "Yeah I know. Piece of cake."

"Come on, Kiba. Eat the cheese," Shino pointed at the brown bag.

"Not here," Sasuke pushed the brown paper bag to the corner of the desk, "Eat it somewhere else."

Naruto snickered, "Let's eat at Shikamaru's desk!"

Kiba nodded enthusiastically, grabbing his goat cheese and heading for the desk two feet away. Naruto stood from his seat, taking his baby food with him and followed his friend.

Sasuke and Shino exchanged looks, letting their partners get situated atop Shikamaru and Choji's desk.

"What did he have to do?" Sasuke asked when the two were out of earshot.

"Name all twenty-seven letters of the English alphabet."

Sasuke turned and gave Shino an odd look, "There's only twenty-six."

"I know."

"Hn," Sasuke began walking towards the two morons, "Idiot."

Naruto had already popped the lid off his jar. He was sitting patiently on the desk waiting for Kiba to unravel the paper holding the clump of white cheese.

Kiba visibly shuddered, "Damn," he muttered, "The smell is getting in through my mouth."

"I'll go first," Naruto said as he stuck his spoon into the pale yellow goop.

Sasuke made himself comfortable by leaning against the desk.

Shino had taken up residence beside him, casually fixing his glasses as he stared at the two fools.

Naruto confidently picked up the spoon and popped it into his mouth. Instantly his face took on a different form. The blonde started coughing.

"Swallow, Naruto!" Kiba hit the blonde hard on the back. Naruto tragically swallowed and took in a mighty breath.

"That's not ramen!" He held the jar away from himself, "It's shit."

"Finish it."

"Fuck," Naruto shook his head, "No way."

"I'll add in five bucks," Shino said.

"Me too!" Kiba nodded.

Naruto stared at the jar in his hand. Fifteen bucks if he could eat the whole thing.

Damn, it tasted like ass.

"I'll double it," Sasuke said, "I'll give you ten bucks if you eat it all without throwing up. That brings the total up to twenty dollars."

"Dude, you got to eat it!" Kiba was practically bouncing in his seat, "I would!"

"You have to eat the cheese," Shino pointed out dryly.

Kiba grumbled. "Fuck you."

"I'll do it," Naruto bravely uttered. He picked up his spoon and put it into the baby food. Quickly, he brought it to his mouth and swallowed. If he ate it fast, it would be over soon. Everyone watched as Naruto gagged. The poor officer's eyes watered as he kept shoveling in the atrocious substance. Within a few minutes he was done. He threw the empty jar at Sasuke and held his hand over his mouth.

"Don't throw up," Sasuke reminded.

"Bite me," the blonde growled.

_Now that's an interesting thought,_ Sasuke mused. Then catching himself, he blinked. Twice.

"Your turn," Shino said looking at Kiba.

Kiba winced, nonetheless he broke off a piece of the cheese. The gang could see Kiba's nostrils flare as he brought the cheese to his mouth. The young officer chucked a chunk of it in his mouth and chewed as fast as he could. Everyone watched with baited breath as Kiba's eyes rolled into the back of his head. Naruto was afraid the poor dude was going to faint.

Finally, Kiba swallowed.

He looked up at Shino, fire blazing in his narrowed eyes, "I fucking hate you right now."

Shino smiled, "Eat the cheese."

"Fuck me," Kiba whimpered as he brought another chunk to his mouth. The second time was worse than the first. It took Kiba nearly ten whole minutes to finish the cheese, and when he was done, the officer's complexion had a green tint to it. The young officer held his stomach as he slid off Shikamaru's desk, shakily standing to his feet. He suddenly convulsed.

The three men quickly took five giant steps back from the brunet. Kiba nearly missed the trash bin as he emptied out the contents of his stomach.

Hearing him retch was making Naruto rather nauseous as well. His hold over his mouth tightened.

"Keep it in, Naruto," Sasuke warned, a smirk playing on his lips as he turned towards his own desk, intent on getting back to work. Naruto nodded slowly as he followed behind.

Kiba turned his face towards his partner when he was done. Shino was leaning against the wall staring at him through his tinted glasses, "I hope you burn in hell, Aburame."

Shino shrugged his shoulders as he threw his partner a box of tissues, "Cry me a river."

:::

"This doesn't look good," Kankuro said as he went through Akio's credit card statement, "If he was trying to run, leaving this kind of trail was the most amateurish thing to do. Anyone with enough knowledge of the system could have tracked him."

Gaara nodded as he continued reading the file, "I think he learned from his mistakes." He handed the file he was looking at to his brother, "He pulled out all his cash a few days ago and got off grid."

"By then I guess it was too late." Kankuro picked up another document, "He was definitely involved in something," he said, "Look at these sudden large deposits. That couldn't have been from anything _legal_."

Gaara grunted in agreement as he wrote another fact down on Akio's timeline. Sai had gone to speak with some of his informants. If there was anything going on in the underworld, he'd be able to get the lowdown within an hour or so.

The two of them had been at it for hours, piecing information together bit by bit. Lunch had been forgotten as they followed one lead to another. Around three o'clock in the afternoon, Hinata knocked on their office door. She had gotten a little lost on her way over. Apparently, the two officers had been promoted to Sergeants sometime last night after hauling in a drug boss.

The two brothers now held an office at the back of the precinct, away from the low ranking officers.

"Um, excuse me," Hinata said, her voice a little shaky, "I have Kyoko Hayashi's file that was requested."

"Thanks, Hinata," Kankuro took the file from the girl's hand, casting a friendly smile her way, "Cheer up."

Hinata blushed, "I'm fine."

"You know Temari and her perverse sense of humor."

"You don't think Naruto…N-Naruto-" Hinata's face took on a deeper shade of red.

"Nah," Kankuro smirked, "You know how those two are. Enemies one minute, best friends the next."

"Hm."

The two friends looked at Gaara. The redhead had his eyes closed in thought.

"What, Gaara? You think otherwise?" Kankuro frowned.

"Not really," he said slowly after a minute, "But that picture does worry me."

"How so?"

Gaara turned one green eye at his brother, "Sasuke is very possessive."

"What does that have to do with anything?" Kankuro's brow furrowed in confusion.

"This line of duty is very dangerous," Gaara said, "If Naruto, under some circumstance, gets killed or something happens to him…I think Sasuke would become very unstable."

Hinata's eyes closed in shame. "I'm sorry…I-"

"It's alright, Hinata," Gaara replied, "Sasuke doesn't like it when we speak about the fire."

Kankuro's eyes drifted to the file in his hands as he spoke quietly, "Naruto is the only family he has left."

The three stayed quiet for sometime as each reminisced, lost in their own thoughts. After a little while Hinata excused herself and left the two brothers to work. Kankuro opened the file the young officer had given him and his eyebrows shot up into his hairline. His eyes scanned over the information as fast as he could, "Shit, bro. This is bad."

Gaara rolled his chair over and looked over his brother's shoulder, "Kyoko Hayashi's organs had been removed…money…black market…debt…" Gaara's eyes widened. He grabbed the file from his brother and read it thoroughly. Kankuro sat there staring blindly at the wall. With the information they had been able to dig up, key points now made perfect sense.

"We need to inform the rest of the team-"

The phone sprang to life.

Kankuro picked it up on the second ring, "This is Officer Kankuro…..Sai?...Damn it. Yeah I'm listening….shit…..fuck…..we've got her file…..no, that wasn't in it….those assholes…yeah I'm going to let them know now….what? Who the fuck is that?...Oh…yeah see you later." Kankuro hung up the phone and looked at his brother, "That dude is messed up…but he gets the job done."

Gaara rolled his eyes and stood from his seat, the file held tightly under his arm as he and Kankuro made their way to the office shared by all the low ranking officers.

:::

Sasuke hung up on the phone and scribbled something into his notes. He chanced a glance at Naruto. The blonde was concentrated on the computer screen.

Sasuke could see how his partner's determined blue eyes scanned over documents as he tried to pull out useful information. Naruto blinked and grabbed his pen, scribbling furiously on a sheet of paper. The Uchiha peered over and frowned. Naruto's penmanship had definitely seen better days.

They were making some headway. Sasuke had found that Orochimaru was the owner of one of the bars located within the red district called 'The Sound Wave.' He also managed to discover that the prostitution ring 'boss' held a decent amount of shares in other businesses located within the red district. However, he was having a harder time getting anyone to talk to him through the phone. It seemed like he would have to go there in person to get the answers.

"I got another alias," Naruto sighed, "Orano Yakahime."

"That's sixteen all together," Sasuke said as he added the name to the list of aliases.

"You know what he went by when he killed my dad?" Naruto's hand tightened around his pen as he stared at his computer screen, "Shiroi Hebi…White Snake. He was known as White Snake. My dad tried to bring some justice to the world…and that son of a bitch killed him. I'm going to find that asshole and I'm going to slit his throat."

"Cool it, Naruto," Sasuke said sternly, "Stop being an idiot."

"Screw you, bastard," Naruto glared at his partner, "If I recall correctly, after that fire you-" Sasuke's fist collided with the blonde's jaw.

Eyes were narrowed into slits, the Uchiha glared angrily down at his partner. "Shut up."

It was at that moment that Kankuro and Gaara entered the room.

"Cut it out you two," Kankuro yelled as Naruto threw himself at the raven haired officer. He let out a curse as Naruto's fist collided with the Sasuke's stomach.

Gaara and Kankuro both grabbed the two officers and pulled them apart.

"You're an asshole, Uchiha!"

"Don't talk about things you know nothing about!" Sasuke yelled back.

"Alright! Alright!" Kankuro hollered.

Just then Raidou's head popped in from outside. He accessed the situation and looked at Kankuro who was trying hard to keep the Uchiha from lunging towards the angered blonde, "I'm guessing they're enemies right now?"

"That would be an accurate statement," Shino said as he looked up from his work desk.

"You know Sasuke and Naruto," Kiba picked at something stuck in his teeth, "One minute they're the best of friends, the next…deadly enemies." Raidou nodded and threw the boys a manila folder. Kiba took it and upon opening it, wrinkled his nose.

"Really?" He looked up, a disgusted look on his face, "Ruffling through a dumpster? Can't we do something else?"

Raidou shrugged, "He's your captain. Take it up with him."

"I don't want to look through the trash again!" Kiba whined, "I have a sensitive nose."

Raidou shrugged and left, leaving Kiba to whine to Shino. Kankuro and Gaara were still holding their friends tightly waiting for one of them to regain their sanity. It took a minute or so before Sasuke, the more level headed one, relaxed and stopped squirming. Kankuro sighed in relief and let the younger officer go. Gaara still held a firm hold over Naruto, the blonde was nowhere near calm enough to be let go. Sasuke threw his partner an evil look and took his seat behind the desk, "Stop screwing around, dobe."

Naruto growled, "Fuck you!"

"Hn."

"AH!" Naruto attempted to lunge and nearly broke out of Gaara's hold. However, Kankuro pulled Naruto back by his hair and gave him a stern look.

"Knock it off," he hissed, "We have work to do."

The blonde glared at his friend but tried to reign in his emotions. Slowly, he relaxed and roughly two minutes later, Gaara and Kankuro let him go.

"We're meeting in Captain Major Yamato's office. He and Kakashi said they'd be arriving any minute. Sai is also on his way over." Sasuke and Naruto nodded in understanding. The team headed out of the office, passing Shino and Kiba on the way. The two officers were busy pulling on plastic blue suits to even acknowledge their fellow serving men. When they reached Yamato's office, they found Sai already waiting for them.

"Captain Yamato said he'll be here in a minute," Sai said, "Apparently Captain Kakashi got…sidetracked at a bookstand on the way here."

Kankuro smirked knowingly while the other three rolled their eyes in annoyance. Sai walked over to Naruto and bent down in front of him. Before Naruto could react, the black haired boy reached out his hand and cupped him.

Naruto screeched and backed into the wall.

"WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU DOING?" He yelled.

"You're well armed here too," Sai straightened, "And here I thought you were just a dickless piece of ass."

Naruto was so angered that he sputtered, spit flying as he tried to find words to fire at the rather 'hand on' officer.

Sai turned towards Sasuke, noticing the rather furious glare the other was sending him. "Your lover has a very nice package. I suggest you fuck him well."

Immediately both Kankuro and Gaara grabbed onto the blonde before Naruto had a chance to decapitate their teammate.

"Hn."

"Pardon me? I didn't catch that."

"Please refrain from molesting my partner."

"Hello everyone! Sorry we're late." Kakashi burst into the room, "There was this old lady who needed-"

"Save it, Kakashi," Sasuke said dryly shooting one last glaring look as Sai. "We don't care."

"Mah," Kakashi said dejectedly, however his smile fell and seriousness overtook his features. Yamato made his way to his desk and threw a set of keys on the table.

"We weren't able to gather much," Kakashi said as his hand found its way into his silvery hair, "The ones who knew something didn't say much. However, we did get the name the organization goes by. They call themselves the Akatsuki. Each member of the group has a tattoo of a red cloud on their left upper arm. They seem to wear a pin with their red cloud insignia on their clothes as well. What we've gathered is that they mostly deal in the black market…selling organs…people…and anything of great value. Apparently, Orochimaru had once been a part of the Akatsuki. We don't know why he left. No one seemed to know. The only ones who deal face to face with the Akatsuki are Orochimaru and some others higher up on the food chain. Our prisoners didn't seem to know their names. Quite unfortunate really," Kakashi shrugged.

"So, they call themselves the Akatsuki huh," Naruto crossed his arms, "Let's find those assholes and lock them up!"

"Hold it, Naruto," Kakashi said sternly, "These aren't your average run of the mill thugs. They're smart, deadly, well armed and very hard to find."

"They all have tattoos on their arms!" Naruto threw his hands up in the air, "How many people do you think have a red cloud tattooed on their arm?"

"We can't just go around asking to see people's arms, dobe," Sasuke said with a roll of his eyes, "Stop being an idiot."

"That's pretty much it," Kakashi said, "How about you?"

"We didn't find much," Sasuke stated, "No one would really talk to us on the phone. However, we did manage to gather that Orochimaru owns a few shares and buildings within the red district. We searched through the police records and noted down all his aliases. We were hoping they'd help us find more information on his business dealings within the red district."

"So nothing very useful," Yamato sighed.

"Afraid not."

"We found a couple of things," Kankuro said, "Sai had gotten some information from his outside contacts that really helped us piece together parts of Akio's timeline." He pulled something from a folder, "It all started with his wife Kyoko. Akio had lost his job and they were having problems making ends meet. That's when Kyoko took a job at one of the bars within the red district. The pay seemed to be enough. She worked there for about a month with no problems. Akio had gotten a job delivering packages for one of the businesses within the red district. However, it didn't take long for money to become tight. The little kid they had was draining them dry, so Kyoko took another job working nights as a dancer in one of the stripper joints. She was fired when a fight broke out which is what led her to borrow money from a man who goes by Hitoshi. Kyoko and Akio quickly found themselves knee deep with the wrong people. They couldn't pay the man the money. It's not clear what happened next but what we know is Kyoko decided to sell one of her kidneys. It seems that she wasn't paid fully. Their neighbors heard Kyoko and Akio fighting a few nights before her murder. Apparently, Akio was scared. Kyoko wanted to go back and demand they give her the rest of the money. Akio told her she shouldn't have sold anything in the first place. Against her husband's wishes, she went back. When Kyoko didn't come home that night, we're guessing Akio went looking for her. That's when he stole a Jinchuriki."

"What's a Jinchuriki?" Naruto asked.

"The Jinchuriki are a set of nine stone sculptures created by the monks of the Hidden Sun Valley thousands of years ago. Each statue costing at least 180,000,000 yen," Sai answered.

"Yeah," Kankuro nodded, "Captain Yamato, can I use your computer?"

The ANBU officer nodded, moving from his desk. Kankuro quickly began pulling things up on the screen. When he was done, he flipped the laptop over and pointed, "These are the nine Jinchuriki. The One-Tailed Demon Tanuki. The Two-Tailed Demon Cat. The Three-Tailed Demon Turtle. The Four-Tailed Demon Ape," Kankuro clicked on the next picture, "The Five-Tailed Demon Whale-Horse. The Six-Tailed Demon Gastropod. Seven-Tailed Demon Rhino Beetle. The Eight-Tailed Demon Ox-Cephalopod," Kankuro clicked once more, "And finally …the Nine-Tailed Demon Fox."

Naruto stared wide eyed at the fox statue displayed on the screen. He had seen that statue before. In fact, he had seen it sitting in his father's study on a bookshelf locked within a bulletproof glass case.

"These statues have been scattered all over the word," Kankuro said as he exited out of the window, "Gaara and I think Akio was killed for taking the Jinchuriki. The guy ran from his home with his kid, leaving a cyber trail behind him. It was too late for him when he realized he was being followed. We think the Akatsuki found him, took back their Jinchuriki and in addition took the man's organs."

"Do you have facts to back up your claims?" Yamato asked.

Gaara shook his head, "We have some facts but, most of it all is speculation on our part."

"My sources are usually accurate," Sai added, "However it is indeed hard to prove our theory."

"I see," Yamato sighed. He looked at Kakashi. The man seemed to be deep in thought. His eyebrows were furrowed in concentration. "Kakashi?"

The silver haired officer looked up, locking his gaze with his friend and co-worker, "I need to think some more," his voice was soft, "However, there is no doubt we're going to need to visit the red district. We'll need to go inside every establishment and gather as much information as we can."

"Are we going undercover?" Naruto asked. He was barely managing to keep a grip on his excitement.

Kakashi nodded, "Tomorrow night, make sure to dress accordingly. We need your easy going personality, Naruto," Kakashi looked at the Uchiha. "You too, Sasuke. Dress well. You, Naruto, Gaara and Sai are going in undercover. Kankuro, Yamato and I are going to try to find more information on the Jinchuriki collection. I want you boys well rested. Go home, get some sleep and report back to the precinct tomorrow afternoon. You're all taking the night shift."

Everyone in the room collectively nodded and left Yamato's office. When Yamato and Kakashi were the only two left, Kakashi came forward and leaned over the wooden desk.

"We need to talk to Jiraiya."

:::

Naruto was gathering his things to leave when he saw Sakura and Ino walking into the office. The two girls were holding bags of groceries as they headed for their desks.

"Hey, Sakura!" Naruto called out, "What's with the bags?"

The rosette turned around, "We have the next watch at the safe house. Temari called and asked us to pick up some groceries. We'll be heading over there in an hour or so."

"Oh," Naruto grinned evilly, "Don't expect to get any sleep."

Ino glared at the blonde as she flicked her hair and continued on her way. Sakura shrugged her shoulders and ignored Naruto.

"Here's the money," Sasuke handed the blonde a crisp twenty dollar bill before heading towards the door. Naruto took his earnings and shoved them in his pocket. He ran up behind his partner and clapped him on the shoulder, "Wanna go get some ramen?"

Sasuke stopped and looked at Naruto pitifully. The blonde was looking at him with large blue doe-like eyes waiting in anticipation. Sighing, the raven haired officer nodded, "Alright, dobe."

Naruto grinned, grabbing Sasuke's arm and pulling him out of the precinct. Shizune was nearly knocked over by the charging boys. She glared at their disappearing forms as she straightened out her clothes.

Roughly an hour later, Shikamaru and Choji walked into the precinct from their patrol and headed to their shared office space. They had two more hours left before they could go home and so, were posted on phone duty. Shikamaru thought this would be the perfect time to grab some shuteye. As soon as they reached their desk, Shikamaru plopped in his chair and put his head on the table. His head snapped back up almost instantly as he clamped his hand over his nose.

"What the hell is that smell?" He said angrily as he stared at his desk. Choji bent down to sniff the wooden surface.

"I think it's goat cheese," he said after a minute or so.

"Troublesome," Shikamaru muttered as he looked about the room. The usual suspects were nowhere to be found.

* * *

**Hope you guys enjoyed this chapter!**

**Favs and Reviews are greatly appreciated!**

**Until next time,**

**-Smartcat**


	5. That's What Friends Do, Right?

**After such a long time, I have finally written the next chapter of this story. Mostly, I wasted my time editing the four chapters before this because my writing style had changed so much within a one year interval. So I apologize for the inhumane wait, and I hope you all can forgive me ::pouts::**

**Okay, here is the next chapter!**

**ATTENTION: Lime put back**

* * *

Chapter 5: That's What Friends Do, Right?

An unmarked van rumbled along the street heading towards the infamous red street district of the land of fire. Yamato remained quiet behind the driver's wheel, maneuvering the vehicle with excelled precision through a narrow passage. In the back, hunched and leaning against the metal doors were Gaara, Sasuke, Naruto and Sai. The four men were dressed in casual attire, sporting button down shirts and dark slacks. Beside Sasuke, Naruto fiddled agitatedly with the necklace given to him by Tsunade. The crystal slipped over his fingers, sliding over cold and rather clammy hands.

The blonde didn't want to admit it, but he was nervous. This was going to be the first big case of his, hopefully, long career. Swallowing the accumulating saliva in his mouth, Naruto chanced a quick glance at his partner. Sasuke stood stoically by his side, face set in a clear depiction of determination. Absentmindedly the blonde let his eyes scan over the young officer's clothing. Sasuke was dressed in a dark navy button down oxford shirt. Sharp black slacks clothed his long legs and an expensive looking leather belt was expertly weaved through the belt loops.

"Alright," Kakashi's voice echoed in the deadly silent vehicle, bringing Naruto quickly out of his thoughts. "Uzumaki and Uchiha, you take the North end. Subaku and Sai, the South."

Four heads nodded and stealthily slid out from the back of the van, melting into the encompassing darkness. Wordlessly the unit split into their designated pairs and headed off towards their destined locations. Tonight was all about gathering information. And no one wanted to come back home empty handed.

Watching as the forms of his team departed from sight, Kakashi leaned back in his seat and gave a large sigh before turning his head towards the two remaining individuals. Kankuro was unnaturally quiet as he sat upon the van's carpeted floor, staring mindlessly into the screen of his wireless apparatus.

"So…" the silver haired officer grinned through his mask, "Anyone get lucky over the weekend?"

Beside him he heard Yamato choke as the ANBU officer grabbed the wheel tighter in his grip. Kakashi chuckled lowly under his breath.

"No? Just me then I guess…"

"Ha!" Kankuro laughed, pointing a finger at the older man, "Plastic dolls don't count!"

And just like that, the dark mood dissipated.

Naruto and Sasuke both agreed that the most likely place they'd find information on Orochimaru or this _Akatsuki _organization was at the 'Sound Wave.' After slaving at their desks for hours on end, they managed to pinpoint where most information was leaking from…that being this notorious club residing deep within the red district.

As they passed by the throngs of scantily clad women, Sasuke tried to keep a steady grip on his revulsion. No, it wasn't that he was disgusted by the abnormally large bosoms he saw at every corner. What really irked him was the way some of these women were staring at Naruto. They were crooning at him, puckering their lips and batting their eyelashes at the blonde. However Naruto didn't seem to mind…and Sasuke didn't know if _that_ was what pissed him off even more. Did his idiot of a partner _like_ this sort of thing?

"Hn."

"Hey, bastard," Naruto said humorously, "I bet that one over there will blow you for free with the way _she_ is looking at you…"

Sasuke didn't even pause in his stride as he glanced in the direction the blonde had been looking in. Sure enough, wrapped around the lamppost was a redhead. Bust nearly spilling out of her almost inexistent blouse.

"You even manage to catch every whore's attention!" The blonde said in disbelief as he caught sight of another overly zealous woman throwing her gaze at the Uchiha.

_What did a guy have to do to get some attention around here?_ Naruto folded his arms crossly. _God…Sasuke always managed to capture the hearts of women he crossed paths with, even if he didn't want to!_

"Okay, seriously," Naruto suddenly grabbed the Uchiha by the arm and began patting his partner down, sniffing him as he did so.

"What the fuck are you doing, dobe?" The raven haired Uchiha incredulously said as he grabbed Naruto by the shoulders and pulled the other man away from him.

"Is it the cologne?" Naruto wondered aloud to himself, stretching his neck and sniffing Sasuke's collar, accidentally brushing his nose against a sliver of exposed pale skin. The Uchiha shuddered and pushed the blonde hard, creating a much desired distance between the two of them. Engulfing as much air into his lungs as he could, Sasuke expelled it slowly, letting the pleasant shivers depart alongside his breath.

"You should seriously consider seeing a psychiatrist," Sasuke suggested darkly, "Something is definitely not right with that head of yours."

"Oh believe me," Naruto griped, "Everything is all hunky dory up in my noggin. _You're_ the one with the pheromone distribution problem."

Sasuke quirked an eyebrow upwards at the statement, "A what?"

"You heard me," Naruto turned on his heel and continued walking, a smug smile creeping its way onto his sun kissed face.

Without much effort, the Uchiha matched the younger man's stride and glared venomously at his partner. "I do _not_ have problems."

"Every woman within a ten foot radius is trying to seduce you!"

_Seriously,_ Naruto thought, _for an officer of Konoha, Sasuke sure lacked skills in the observation department… _

"Moron," Sasuke rolled his eyes and shoved his hands unceremoniously into his trouser pockets, "Half of them are staring at you."

Naruto balked, "Really?" Head swiveling to the side he tried to see which sort of 'damsels' his hot godlike body attracted. "Where?"

"Why does it matter?" Sasuke forced out, "I thought your heart was set on Sakura?"

Naruto paused in his surveillance, his eyes falling to stare at the grey sidewalk the two of them were treading.

Now, Sasuke didn't need to be a genius to figure out that whatever he had said caused the spirits of his partner to fall drastically. A feeling of guilt washed over him for a split second before he dispelled it with a single thought. _Why the hell do I have to feel guilty for? I only asked a simple question!_

"I'm going to have to give up on that one," replied the blonde a little bitterly. Ocean blue eyes looked up and stared into the Uchiha's face. "I asked her out when I went to grab our lunches…back when we were on babysitting duty." The smile didn't reach his eyes as the blonde flashed his bright grin at the Uchiha. "She turned me down…but that's okay! I knew she didn't like me, so it's all good. We're still friends!"

_All good my ass,_ Sasuke thought wryly. If there was one person who failed at lying to him, it was Naruto. The loud, frivolous idiot on his right.

"Hn," he grunted, "You can do better than her."

Naruto let out a short chuckle, "Hell yeah I can!"

As they turned the corner, their eyes quickly made contact with the rather flashy display of lights illuminating the Sound Wave entrance. Neither said a word as they walked past the highly varnished wooden doors and entered the establishment. It was now time for business.

:::

"Clamp!" Orochimaru yelled as another spray of blood hit his scrubs, coloring the pale blue articles in a fine mist of cherry red.

"He's tachycardic!" Kabuto announced loudly as he used his shoulder to adjust the large round rimmed glasses slipping off his nose, his arms deep within the patient's chest cavity.

Within a matter of seconds the loud machines that were all beeping simultaneously stopped and threw the underground chamber into an almost intolerable silence.

A tired sigh flew past Orochimaru's lips as he removed the mask covering the lower portion of his face a few minutes later. Tired eyes stared down at his test subject angrily. Another one had bled out. How many was that now? Forty-seven? Forty-eight? Damn…he'd have to take a look at his log book. See what had gone wrong _this_ time…

Three heavy knocks sounded from outside the sterilized room causing Orochimaru to growl lowly in his throat. He had specifically instructed not to be interrupted when in the middle of surgery! Did these idiots not comprehend the Japanese language?

"Come in!" He snarled, ripping the medical scrubs off himself and throwing them spitefully at the floor. The sound of feet shuffling and the creaking of a hinge reverberated in his ears before snakelike eyes landed on a rather muscular man, three guns tucked into the belt of his pants.

"Boss," he spoke shortly, "It's them."

Figures.

"Kabuto," Orochimaru called out as he made his way towards the door, "Let's go see what the Akatsuki want now."

:::

"I haven't found much," Kankuro said after both Yamato and Kakashi told him that Jiraiya suggested they delve deeper into the mystery behind the Jinchuriki statutes. "If there _is_ information on them, then it's definitely _not_ online."

"Hm," Kakashi tilted his head to the side thoughtfully, "Well, that sucks."

A snort erupted from his right causing both officers to turn their heads and stare objectively at the ANBU agent. Schooling his expression, Yamato quickly adjusted himself and gazed back at the scrutinizing glances he was receiving.

"What?" He shrugged, his face now a mask of indifference.

"Never mind."

"I guess this means we're going to have to do this the old fashioned way," Kankuro mumbled, shutting his laptop closed.

"Yeah…" Kakashi sighed, rubbing his forehead in an attempt to dispel the quickly approaching headache. "…I had a feeling this would be _that_ kind of case."

The ANBU officer nodded and looked out through the wind shield. "So…who is going to go through the archives?"

Three pairs of eyes met in a flash.

"Not it!"

"Not it!"

"-Not i- damn it!"

The two senior officers smiled smugly to themselves.

:::

Kabuto followed Orochimaru into his office, closing the door behind him as he did so. Out of the corner of his eye the young apprentice watched as Orochimaru pressed the speaker button on the black dial phone.

"The room is secure," Orochimaru announced as he turned around, "What is it now, Pein?"

A deep voice rumbled from the other end causing an unpleasant shiver to roll down the back of Kabuto's spine.

"It wasn't in the fifth."

"Shame." Orochimaru said emotionlessly.

"I've already sent a team to retrieve the two tailed demon cat."

"I lost another one," Orochimaru's voice didn't waver as he stared monotonously at the blank wall on his right, "But I do have another test subject ready to go. What I need from you is another uterus and plenty of type O negative."

There was a minute of silence before the voice came back, more icy than before.

"This is the second one this week, Orochimaru."

"I am fully aware of that."

"How many more failed attempts are there going to be? The police have already somehow caught on to our scent!"

Snakelike eyes narrowed. This was news to him. "Well it sure wasn't one of _mine_."

"Doesn't matter!"

"I need fresh blood and a viable uterus," Orochimaru repeated. "When we find that sample, I don't want to take any chances. There won't be _any_ room for error."

Kabuto hesitantly fiddled with his glasses. He knew why Pein was so on edge. After all, a fresh viable uterus required another murder and cover up. Sure they would make a profit on the victim's other organs…but the stakes were high. Especially now since the cops had gotten a whiff of them.

"Fine," the voice growled, "Do you have any girls you wouldn't mind parting with at the moment?"

Orochimaru smirked, "Plenty of them, actually."

A chuckle erupted from the other end.

"Two days."

"Can't wait." Ending the call, Orochimaru looked up at Kabuto with a glimmer in his eye. "Kabuto, get ready to go."

"Where are we going?" The light haired man asked as Orochimaru walked past him towards the door.

"The Sound Wave."

"Why?"

"Our supply of test subjects is low."

:::

Naruto positioned himself at a table close to the bar and smiled out at the crowd. He had already made his first round, bumping elbows and catching bits of dialogue as he went. Sasuke had situated himself at the bar and was keenly listening to all the conversations taking place within a five foot radius around him.

"….Five buck for a bj? Not bad…."

"….Let's go to the corner over there…"

"…Gawd I feel shooo wasteeed….."

"….I really wanna fuck that guy over there…"

Sasuke choked a little at the vulgarity of the last statement he'd overheard. Turning his head to the side he saw a busty blonde wink at him. She motioned to the shot glass in her hand before bringing it to her mouth and shoving the damn thing inside. The Uchiha didn't know whether to be completely repulsed or surprised. Nonetheless he shook his head and took another sip of his ginger ale. From his perch at the bar he found his partner sitting at one of those small tables exchanging words with a rather pretty looking raven haired girl.

Brows angled downwards when he saw the woman lean over the expanse of the table and lick his partner's cheek. Rage flared through his body as he witnessed her arm disappear down the blonde's pants. However, to his relief, Naruto pushed the girl away.

Unknown to the spectators, two pairs of eyes were watching the crowd silently from the shadows of a second floor hallway. A hallway, that was completely off limits to the paying customers down below.

"Hmm."

Kabuto shifted his gaze towards his mentor as the man grunted approvingly.

"See someone you like?" He asked with a wicked smiled, the light reflecting off his glasses as he moved his head.

"Indeed," Orochimaru answered and pointed towards a far table, "That man…"

"The redhead?"

"The blonde."

Kabuto adjusted his gaze and watched as the blonde took a swig of his drink before laughing at something the whore in front of him said.

"Get him."

With a nod of his head Kabuto left his boss's side, a cruel smile playing across his face. Orochimaru most definitely had a good eye. The blonde would be just perfect.

After letting another very pretty looking prostitute know that he wasn't looking for a quick fuck, Naruto found himself alone. To the unknowing eye, it might have seemed that all the blonde was doing was wasting productive time. However, to those select few who truly _knew_ the young officer, this was just the way Uzumaki worked.

Naruto let out a sigh as he digested everything he was able to overhear and whittle out of the unsuspecting damsels flocking to him like bees to honey. Apparently, the evil son of a bitch who went by the name Orochimaru, had picked up an apprentice. No one was able to drop said apprentice's name. They only managed to give him an alias.

The helmet.

Naruto thought that to be a rather stupid alias. If he had to pick one, he definitely would have gone for something much cooler…like 'Dragon,' or maybe even 'Death Scythe.' Honestly anything would have been better than _'The Helmet.'_

"Is this seat taken?"

Blue eyes looked up to find themselves staring into an endless pool of shadow. He shook his head, indicating that the chair beside him was free.

With a nod of his head Kabuto sat down, adjusting his glasses as he did so. "Thank you. I just wanted to get some breathing room."

Naruto quirked an eyebrow, not understanding.

"From the girls…very persistent bunch."

"AH!"Naruto grinned in comprehension. "Yeah, I know! I've already turned down like six of them!"

Kabuto chuckled, taking this momentary distraction to bring Naruto's glass a little closer towards him.

"My name is Naruto!" The blonde held out his hand. Kabuto took it firmly and gave it a good shake before pulling back, slipping a little something into Naruto's glass with his other hand as he did so.

"They call me Kabuto," he responded politely, giving the blonde a small smile. "What brings you to this fine establishment?"

The blonde tensed. Shit…what should he say?

"Uh…I wanted some cheap drinks."

"But you're drinking club soda."

Observant little snot.

"…T-that's because it's my buffer!"

Kabuto cocked one eyebrow. "Buffer?"

"Yeah," Naruto nodded vigorously, "Helps me stay on my game, you know? Not get totally piss ass drunk…I'm not a very good drunk."

"Most people aren't."

Rubbing the back of his neck good naturedly, Naruto let a chuckle rumble forth from his throat, "Yeah…."

"How about you finish this drink over here, and I'll start you with your first alcoholic beverage, hm?"

Kabuto watched the inner turmoil take place within the blonde. Naruto obviously didn't want a drink.

That whole tale he wove for him came straight from his ass. _No matter though_, Kabuto thought wryly, _I still need him to drink_.

"Sure!"

The apprentice smiled inwardly as he watched Naruto down the medicated soda. A scrunch of the nose was Kabuto's only indicator that the blonde noticed a difference in the taste. It would have been slight…to the untrained professional. Interesting…

But that didn't matter right now. Ten minutes tops and the fool would be flushed all the way to the tips of his toes. When he would later suggest on taking the blonde home, the other man would agree wholeheartedly. Then he would knock him out in the back alley and hand him off to be taken away. Simple as that.

Taking Naruto's now empty glass, Kabuto stood from his seat. "I'll be right back, shouldn't take me to long. Ten minutes tops."

The blonde nodded his head and watched the other man retreat. His thoughts began to jumble in his head as he straightened in his chair. Searching the room for Sasuke, he found the raven had moved from the bar to a table by the door. _Must not have gotten much from his other location,_ Naruto thought to himself.

He continued to sit and listen to the others conversing around him. However as the minutes passed, he started to feel undoubtedly ill. Heat flared through his body like a wild fire, scorching his insides with its flickering flames. Wiping his face, he looked around the room again. He couldn't catch sight of that Kabuto guy. Probably was for the best. Standing to his feet shakily, Naruto found the Uchiha and began to make his way towards his partner.

Sasuke furrowed his brow as the young blonde officer stumbled towards him. What had Naruto done this time? He couldn't have had a drink. Even _he_ wasn't that much of an idiot.

"Sasuke," Naruto called raggedly, his eyes refusing to focus. "I don't feel so good."

"Dobe," the Uchiha gave an exasperated sigh, "What the hell did you do this time?"

Naruto leaned heavily against the table as he shook his head. God he felt so hot.

"Nothing."

The Uchiha carefully looked into his partner's face, noticing the unmistakable flush taking over Naruto's tanned skin. He also noticed the unusual glaze filming over the usually vibrant cobalt eyes.

"C'mon," he stood to his feet, grabbing Naruto by the shoulder. "I'm calling Kakashi. You're in no shape to continue."

Pulling Naruto's arm over his shoulder, Sasuke supported the blonde's weight and led him towards the door. Unbeknownst to them, Kabuto was silently watching them leave, a displeased look on his face. He hadn't noticed that the blonde had been here with someone else.

Something didn't feel right.

Discarding the now full glass of sake, the light haired man cast his eyes up towards the rafters, silently letting his master know that he would be taking leave.

Sasuke put his phone back into his pocket after calling Kakashi and giving the leading officer their exact location. The former ANBU agent assured him that they'd be there within fifteen minutes…after all, maneuvering through whore infested streets in a van was no easy task. So knowing that he had to keep out of sight for at least twenty minutes, Sasuke pulled Naruto and himself into the darkened alley behind the club.

"Ugh," Naruto groaned as his back hit against the brick wall. He could barely move his arms and the pulsing in his nether regions was slowly turning into an aching throb. It couldn't be left like this…he needed to fix it. But damn his arm wouldn't move properly.

"Ugh," he groaned again, remembering the strange taste to the soda. Did that Kabuto fuck drug him? Seriously, what the hell? When his 'little' problem was taken care of, he would march straight back into that club and beat the shit out of that pale faced man or his name wasn't Naruto Uzumaki!

"What are you groaning for?" Sasuke hissed, turning back to look at his flush faced partner. As soon as the words left his mouth, the Uchiha swore he saw Naruto's face turn a brighter shade of watermelon red. "…Is it hurting you?"

"Sasuke," Naruto whispered, "I…I think I'm going to die…"

The Uchiha froze. Damn it, what had happened in that club?

"I think," Naruto panted, "That…b-bastard…drugged me…"

"What?"

"I…I…ugh…"

Taking a few steps away from his trembling partner, Sasuke accessed the blonde thoroughly. That was when his eyes landed on the rather large bulge protruding from the blonde's general crotch area.

Pale cheeks turned red as ripe tomatoes once they realized exactly _why _Naruto had been groaning for the past two minutes.

"You can relieve it, I won't watch." He said hurriedly, closing his eyes and turning his face away.

The head of golden hair drooped down as Naruto nearly fell, his knees barely managing to stay locked to support him. Before the blonde could hit the graveled pavement, Sasuke caught him, hands gripping sturdy shoulders and pushing them against the wall.

"Sasuke…"Naruto mumbled, "…I can't…move m-my…a-arms…"

At that moment the Uchiha wondered if it was possible to die from a raging hard on. You never knew with these things. People died from things as simple as hiccups or laughing.

With a deep breath, Sasuke schooled his emotions and made sure to have a firm grip on his indifference before reaching a pale hand down between Naruto's legs. The blonde gasped into his partner's ear as he felt a hand that was definitely _not_ his cup and squeeze him.

"Sasuke."

Grunting, the Uchiha mumbled. "You would have done it for me if the situation was reversed."

Still, Naruto couldn't believe it. He gasped again as he felt firm hands stroke him through his trousers, fingers digging into the ridges the cloth provided and creating a very pleasing friction. As Sasuke continued to rub, Naruto's sporadic grunts quickly turned into moans.

"Ahh…god that feel so good…Sasuke…HARDER…"

So focused was he on the pleasure he was receiving that Naruto didn't even notice when something slowly began to prick his thigh.

"…AHHH….please, Sasuke….t-touch me…fuck…yeesss…"

Pulling down Naruto's zipper, Sasuke thrust his hand past the elastic of the blonde's boxer and circled his fist around the throbbing cock within. Naruto threw his head back, hitting it against the wall as a pleasured cry echoed off his lips.

With his free hand, Sasuke maneuvered both of the blonde's arms around his neck so that Naruto could lean against him. He tightened his hold on the other's weeping cock and gave it a good tug, eliciting another heartfelt pleasing moan from Naruto's parted pink lips.

Right now was not the time to be thinking. Hell, he couldn't even if he wanted too. Biting back a moan of his own, Sasuke increased the pace, fisting the other man as powerfully as he could. His own pants now painfully tight the Uchiha tried to finish Naruto off. He couldn't be caught with a boner. Not by Naruto _or _anyone else for that matter. Not until he thought things through and figured them out.

"AHHHH!" Naruto's whole body jerked as he orgasmed, cumming with Sasuke's name echoing off his lips. The Uchiha wasn't able to hold back the tiny little groan that escaped his lips as hot, sticky fluid ran over his fisted fingers. More for himself than for the blonde, he let his fingers trail over the cock head, rubbing at the dick hole which still pushed out evidence of Naruto's orgasm. With one final pump, Sasuke withdrew his hand and wiped it against the back of his pants.

"Better?" He asked quietly.

His words were met with silence.

Gritting his teeth, Sasuke poked Naruto's head only to see it loll to the side. Eyelids shielded bright blue eyes from his view and Sasuke heaved an annoyed sigh. Leave it to Naruto to fall asleep at this particular moment.

Five minutes later the inconspicuous van the two of them had departed from rolled to a stop two feet away from them. Wordlessly, Sasuke carried Naruto inside, holding him the whole way home.

* * *

**And that concludes chapter 5. Hope you guys liked it!**

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	6. Don't Be Weird

**Yay! New chapter! And it didn't take me a year to post it *holds for applause* **

**I would like to thank everyone who reviewed last chapter. Most of you don't know this but, Fighting Dreamers was practically the first SasuNaru story I started on this site. Yes, it came before Lessons To Be Learned. The poor thing though had to take a backseat because I had wanted to finished off LTBL first. But many of you had asked me to bring this story out of its hiatus and so I did.**

**Hope you enjoy this chapter!**

* * *

Chapter 6: Don't Be Weird

Kabuto watched quietly from inside his car as the dark haired man carried Naruto into a small two story house. Keeping one eye on his target, he took note of the address and scribbled it down on a piece of scrap paper lying conveniently on the passenger seat. When the pair had disappeared from sight Kabuto leaned forwards, his face just a few inches from the windshield, and turned his attention to the inconspicuous van the two had departed from. It was parked alongside the house, engine still running; its painted black exterior helping it stay hidden in the encompassing darkness of the night. Though the light was poor, he was still able to see a few details that made the bones in his body tremble.

There was no license plate on the car.

The windows were tinted; making it hard to decipher how many people were inside.

Not even a shadow to ease his growing dread.

After a few minutes the dark haired man exited from the house and walked steadily towards the vehicle. As he got in, Kabuto quickly started up his car and waited patiently for the van to move. He had a nasty suspicion about who this sort was.

The gut feeling had been correct when he saw the van pull up to the front of a police station. Cursing colorfully under his breath, Kabuto turned his car around and drove back to the club as quickly as he could. When he had arrived, Orochimaru was nowhere to be found, though that didn't surprise him. The man was never in one place too long. Running a hand through his white, tied back hair, Kabuto heaved a desolate sigh. He needed more time to learn about the blonde anyway.

With sure and even steps the apprentice maneuvered through the crowd, going towards the back of the club where behind a corner was a concealed staircase. Logging on to a computer system on the second floor, Kabuto pulled up a search page and typed in the address he acquired earlier and Naruto's name. The first hit he received made his hackles instantly rise. A growl emitted from his throat as his eyes scanned over the article.

He didn't need to look further. He knew who this guy was.

Naruto Uzumaki, the only son of the long since deceased Chief of Police, Minato.

"I don't think he is going to like this," Kabuto muttered to himself as he stood, logging off the computer.

This was only the start. More trouble was sure to follow, courtesy of the Akatsuki…bunch of murdering, sadistic fucks. He shivered inwardly, mind flashing images of the gruesome corpses the group had left behind. Women…eyes wide with bodies mimicking those of fish fillets; completely scrapped of all vital organs. There was no finesse, no art to their cuts. Nothing compared to the beautiful work his master created. Knife in his hand as he cut open a victim's abdominal cavity. Bringing a hand to his heart, Kabuto centered in on the thumping in his chest. A smile appeared on his face; just thinking of Orochimaru's skill had made his heart rate accelerate.

However, now wasn't the right place for him to be fantasizing about Orochimaru's expert workmanship. There were bigger things a foot that needed to be taken care of.

Traveling back down to the first floor where a bunch of men and women were stumbling drunk, the white haired assistant maneuvered through the throngs and wasted no time in exiting the club. Finding his parked car he got in and drove straight to Orochimaru's place, wondering how his mentor would take the news.

It didn't take him long to reach the towering edifice that was the grand Sage Hotel. Leaving his keys with the valet, Kabuto walked into the lavish reception area, nodding his head at the doorman before continuing on to the elevators. Once inside he pushed for the twenty fifth floor, riding the artistically designed elevator up in silence. As the doors dinged he stepped out, feet sinking into the expensive thick carpet. Straightening out his jacket he walked towards the lacquered oak door that would grant him admittance to Orochimaru's lavish whole floor suite.

Taking a deep breath, Kabuto pulled out a set of keys; his fingers slightly damp from his nervous perspiring. After finding the correct one, he pushed it steadily into the lock and turned the knob. His eyes found Orochimaru immediately when he entered. The raven haired man sat on the leather couch, hair tied back in a ponytail as he sipped a glass of red wine. Upon seeing his young apprentice, he lowered his arm, putting his drink down on the small polished table.

"Kabuto," he smirked, crossing his legs as he leaned against the back of the couch, arms spread wide. "What is it?"

"Not very good news I'm afraid."

The other man pursed his lips. "These days that's hardly a surprise."

Kabuto winced inwardly as he walked over to Orochimaru and took a seat beside him before folding his fingers together. "You remember that blonde man we targeted from the club?"

"Vividly," Orochimaru licked his lips, ebony irises glinting in the light.

"Well..." Kabuto fiddled with his glasses for a few seconds before attempting eye contact with the man that struck fear into the hearts of the most _ruthless_ of thugs. "...He's a cop. And he wasn't there alone."

The temperature in the room seemed to fall and Kabuto had suddenly found the pattern on the carpeted floor extremely interesting.

"A cop?" Orochimaru hissed, his voice carrying the venom of a hundred cobras.

Swallowing with some form of difficulty, Kabuto nodded before continuing. "His name is Naruto Uzumaki."

What he was expecting to hear from the other was a stream of curses, each more vulgar than the one before it. So he was very surprised when the seasoned criminal began to laugh almost uncontrollably.

Now expression blank, Kabuto stared unblinkingly at Orochimaru, wondering if maybe he should call an ambulance. This man never dropped his cool. Ever.

"Sir," Kabuto leaned forwards a little. "Are you alright?"

"This must be fate!" Orochimaru exclaimed, grinning wildly. "Of all the people who could have wandered into my club! Minato's SON!"

"I don't un–"

"This is perfect!" The snake eyed man continued, now standing to his feet. "I couldn't have arranged it better myself!"

Deciding that his master would eventually explain himself, Kabuto chose to remain silent and listen to the maddening rant as Orochimaru began to pace back and forth.

"Once I perfect the technique, I will use Naruto as the vessel for my experiment! This way, my desire is achieved through the ruin of the despicable Uzumaki clan! They have been a thorn in my side ever since I began trying to gather funding for my research. First it was that damn Minato, sticking his nose where it did not belong. _Then_ came that raid where most of my men were either killed or imprisoned! But of course that confounded precinct didn't get away unscathed either. My forces had taken care of that virus of a chief, Minato Uzumaki!"

Taking in a deep breath, Orochimaru turned to Kabuto, finally seeing him. "I will make that boy suffer, Kabuto. Make him suffer like I have for all these years."

:::

At exactly eight o'clock on the dot, Sasuke walked into the precinct with a frown pulling on the corners of his mouth. If one were to look closely, there would appear to be slightly protruding bags under the Uchiha's eyes as well as a definite furrowing of his brow.

On his way to his desk located in the recesses of the police station, the young raven haired officer noticed many of his colleagues already at work. He also happened to spot Izumo and Kotetsu as he turned the corner. The two men both greeted him with a short wave, coffee cups at their lips. Sasuke gave them a simple head nod in return before training his eyes back onto the tiled floor, furrow back in place.

He had barely gotten any sleep the night before, all thanks to the unfortunate events that had occurred during their infiltration of the red district.

Being someone who particularly _disliked_ not having answers to his questions, he had stayed up the better part of the night, mulling over the details of what had transpired between him and Naruto.

He didn't want to admit it to himself, and probably never would have for that matter under normal circumstances. But unfortunately, there was no other reasonable explanation he could conjure that would explain away the events of last night.

He had been sexually aroused…by Naruto's drug induced orgasm.

Not to mention the fact that he had surprisingly _enjoyed_ touching his longtime friend. Hearing Naruto pant into his ear and say his name as his fingers tightened around his shoulder…

The way that the blonde had _encouraged_ him to go faster, pump _harder_…

Sasuke shook his head, heat rising to his cheeks as he entered the shared quarters, marching straight towards his seat. Upon a quick inspection, Sasuke's shoulders relaxed from their tense state. Temari was there, staring bleary eyed at a file while a few other officers were by the copy machine exchanging morning pleasantries.

Thankfully, Naruto had yet to arrive. With a grateful sigh departing from his lips, Sasuke took his seat at his desk and turned on the computer monitor. If he just immersed himself entirely in today's work, he'd be completely able to ignore Naruto and pretend he didn't notice his partner's arrival when the blonde would walk through the door.

Yes. Work now.

Pretend not to notice later.

Good plan.

As he started to write up his findings for the report he was to hand in to Kakashi, a loud CLANG rung out through the precinct. He distinctly heard Raidou yell 'Damn it, Genma! Give me back my fucking pants!' before another set of clanging erupted. With an exasperated eye roll, Sasuke focused his attention back on his report. He didn't need to be a genius to figure out what was going on several feet, two walls and a coffee table away. It was a no brainer, really.

"Then pay the damn water bill!"

"We don't need fucking water!

"I NEED fucking WATER!"

"Whatever the hell for? You only spend eight hours at home anyway!"

"To SHOWER and have SEX with WOMEN in said SHOWER!"

"Ha! You never bring girls back home with you!"

"BECAUSE WE DON'T HAVE FUCKING WATER!"

The door creaked and Sasuke fought the urge to look up.

"No one go outside," Kiba inhaled sharply before pushing the wooden door closed, panting as he turned around. "They have gone completely psycho."

Temari yawned as she stretched in her seat, her eyes coming to rest on the chocolate haired officer at the door. With a weary look at the clock hovering above said door, the blonde woman stood to her feet.

Finally, nine o'clock.

Her dreaded shift was over.

"Where are you going?" Kiba asked her cautiously, keenly moving away from the door and towards his desk when he saw her approaching.

"Home."

"B-but it's a war zone out there," Kiba replied, completely baffled.

"No biggie," Temari shrugged her shoulders, mouth opening in a yawn that could swallow the sun. "It's nothing compared to when Anko is on her period."

All the other cops in the shared office unit paled simultaneously.

Anko and period. Never good to hear in the same sentence.

As Temari flung the flimsy wooden door open, four blurs of blue rushed into the room nearly knocking the female officer off her feet. She blinked twice, scowling and muttering under her breath before giving her head a shake and leaving.

Sasuke inwardly heaved a sigh of relief when neither blur appeared to be Naruto.

So far so good.

However, he was slightly amazed to see Shino standing within the four walls of the room. The insect specialist was breathing heavily through his nose, one hand clutching his chest.

"Hn."

"Shino," Kiba approached his partner wearily, "You okay?"

The dark haired officer nodded his head slowly, eyes invisible behind his thick shades.

Suddenly (and with as much noise as possible) the door was thrown open and a very pissed looking Genma walked through. His teeth viciously set on gnawing the toothpick in his mouth to particle sized pieces.

When his eyes found his team standing a little off to the left, he grabbed the toothpick out of his mouth. "Get Akamaru, we're going!"

Kiba nodded his head furiously and raced out, Shino surprisingly right on his heels.

"You know, Genma," a voice Sasuke would recognize anywhere echoed in the hall, "You could just pay the water bill yourself."

Naruto stood in the doorway, a big smile on his face. He walked into the room completely care free, blue eyes glowing mischievously as a perplexed look overcame the other officer's face.

"…didn't think about that." Genma grumbled, shoving his hands into his pockets.

Naruto winked, "Or just didn't want to, you penny-pincher."

Genma snorted. "Watch that mouth of yours, Naruto. Who knows when I might spike Izumo's food next?"

The blonde haired officer instantly straightened.

"Penny-pincher? Ha! Did _I_ say that? I meant generous! _Extremely_ generous!"

Walking out the door, Genma gave a little wave. "That's what I thought, brat."

As soon as he was gone, Naruto relaxed his shoulders and gave a nervous chuckle before walking over to his shared desk space with Sasuke. The other man was busy at work, typing furiously enough to make the click clacking sound of a keyboard resemble the effect of a standard gunshot.

"Woah…calm down there, Sasuke. There's no emergency." Naruto said as he sat down, "Kakashi isn't going to be here in another two hours."

Quiet.

All that lasted a minute, before Sasuke was back at it; typing even more furiously than he was before.

Naruto growled lowly, "You're a jerk, you know that?"

"Hn."

"Bastard."

:::

Halfway through the day Kakashi showed up to get their reports with the findings from the day before. He then proceeded to tell them that their team would be meeting later that day to go over the case. In the meantime he requested both Sasuke and Naruto to try and gather some intel on the possible locations the Akatsuki could be using as their base of operations. When their supervising officer left, the two men got back to work. It was roughly an hour or so after when the Uchiha bravely turned his attention to something else.

From the corner of his eye, Sasuke watched as Naruto examined the digital files in the precinct database. The blonde seemed to be completely engrossed in his work. His mouth was set in a line as his eyes moved back and forth reading the text. Through his tight locked lips, a tiny portion of his tongue hung out while his finger used the mouse to scroll father down the page.

It didn't even seem like he remembered what had happened last night and Sasuke didn't know whether to be extremely grateful or sincerely annoyed. Technically speaking, he should be happy the blonde idiot didn't recall him shoving his hand down his pants, stroking him into release. Thrilled that Naruto had absolutely no memory of how he attempted to buck against him…they way he groaned in his ear, begging him to move his fist faster.

Tapping his pen against the desk, Sasuke continued to stare thoughtfully at his partner. Could the drug have been so potent that the blonde wouldn't remember a thing after ingesting it? Or was he just pretending not to recall anything? Sasuke frowned. If Naruto remembered but wasn't saying anything…what the fuck did that mean? The younger man was famous for his ever growing ability of _not_ being able to keep his mouth _shut_. So if Naruto wasn't divulging anything, that must truly mean that he did not remember. Letting the pen fall from his fingers, Sasuke brought his hand up to rub at his brow.

Realization struck him when he grasped the fact that he _did_ want Naruto to remember, if only to see whether the other man had enjoyed the event as much as he. Had the moron liked it? Was the image of what they had done burned into his mind? Constantly replaying in the back of his head like some broken record?

Damn it! Why wasn't Naruto saying _anything_!

Not even one word about their mission last night! Not even a peep!

Tightening his hand into a fist, Sasuke continued to stare at his partner, ebony eyes centered on the golden locks of hair that spiked out in all directions.

Naruto swallowed as he clicked on another map, bringing it up onto his computer screen. He didn't need to have eyes in the back of his head to know Sasuke was staring at him. Hell, he could _feel_ the other's eyes boring into the back of his skull like a laser beam. It was downright unnerving! How was he supposed to concentrate when the bastard was wordlessly suffocating him! Grumbling low in his throat, he focused back on the map, trying to give off the vibe of being totally captivated by the eastside demographics of Konoha.

There was no fucking way he was going to let Sasuke know he remembered every little detail of what had happened last night.

No fucking way.

Hell, sick Izumo on him in his raisin induced high, he didn't care!

Nothing would make him bring that night up. Absolutely nothing.

Licking his lips, Naruto clicked on another file and attempted to read its contents. He read the first line and blinked. Then read it again and frowned. Damn, he couldn't concentrate! Chewing on the insides of his cheek, he squinted his eyes and tried to make out Sasuke's reflection from the black pencil holder on his desk. The image was slightly distorted but it served its purpose. The bastard was still staring at him and now there was proof. Pulling his eyes away from the cup of pens and pencils, Naruto turned back to trying to decipher the article displayed on his computer monitor.

Besides, to him it appeared that Sasuke didn't want to talk about yesterday night. Which was _totally_ okay. Because he didn't want to either! Talking about it would just be weird and awkward on a whole other level.

Naruto anxiously shifted in his seat, involuntarily bringing back the images of him and Sasuke in the Red District. His hold on his mouse tightened as the memory replayed in his mind.

He had felt so unbelievably horny, like some sex crazed perv! But god, the way Sasuke had touched him…it felt _so_ good. The firm fist going up and down his cock, adding pressure at his head only to shoot back down again. And fuck…that thumb playing with his slit, encouraging him to cum…

No!

Naruto blinked furiously, trying desperately to dispel the memory.

It wasn't real!

He didn't like it!  
It was all because of that stupid drug that fucking Kabuto had slipped into his drink! He was sure of it! That could be the only reason. After all, he was not gay and absolutely sure that he did not like dick. Of any sort.

End of story.

So why the hell couldn't he forget how good Sasuke's hand felt rubbing his cock? It didn't make sense! Why wouldn't that stupid memory just take a hike and leave him in peace?

"You've been reading that paragraph for ten minutes now, dobe."

Naruto jerked in his seat, completely startled by Sasuke's voice.

"Oh," he closed the window before turning towards the Uchiha, mouth set in a smile. "Haha, I was thinking…so I kind of zoned out."

"Hn," Sasuke snorted.

Rubbing his neck nervously, Naruto gave his partner a confused look. "What?"

"You. Thinking."

"Jackass."

"Dimwit."

Naruto scowled, folding his arms across his chest. "Asshole."

Sasuke was about to retort with a choice word of his choosing but was interrupted by the rather loud rumbling coming from Naruto's stomach. A nervous laugh fell from the blonde's lips as he rubbed his belly.

"Dang, I forgot about lunch."

It was then that Sasuke realized that he hadn't had anything to eat for lunch too. They had been stuck behind the desk ever since they got here. Also, his stomach answering Naruto's was a healthy reminder.

The blonde grinned, "Ha! You're hungry too!"

Sasuke rolled his eyes, "I haven't had lunch yet either."

"You wanna go eat with me?" Naruto asked, standing to his feet and trying to act as normal as possible. Thankfully, he was succeeding.

The Uchiha suspiciously looked at his partner. "Where would we be eating?"

"Our spot."

That's what the Uchiha was afraid of.

"Dobe," Sasuke sighed, leaning his arm against the desk. "I don't want ramen."

"But they have a special today! Three bowls for the price of two!" Naruto waived his arms frantically, "That is a damn steal, Sasuke!"

For some strange reason when Sasuke looked into Naruto's crystalline blue eyes, the word 'No' simply died on his lips. He stared open mouthed at his partner, mind simply gone blank.

Noticing the extra stoniness in Sasuke's already statuesque posture, Naruto leaned down and poked the Uchiha in the shoulder. "Hey, bastard…you in there? I just said we can get some extra pork thrown in if we get there by four."

Sasuke blinked, shutting his mouth.

"What's wrong with you?" Naruto asked, leaning forwards. He didn't realize that his sudden invasion of Sasuke's personal space had catalyzed a rush of unwanted memories to spring forth in the Uchiha's head. Namely, one _particular_ memory.

Shoving Naruto away from himself with a firm palm to the chest, Sasuke stood to his feet. Head lowered in efforts to hide his flaming face with his lengthy ebony bangs.

Rubbing the spot where the older officer had pushed him, Naruto tilted his head to the side. The damn Uchiha was acting weird.

Sasuke shouldn't be acting weird! _He _was supposed to be acting weird! After all, it was _he_ that had _orgasmed _to a handjob given to him by his closest friend, not the other way around!

"Let's go," Sasuke mumbled, turning for the door.

Naruto blinked, letting his hand fall to his side as he caught up to his quickly disappearing partner.

Sasuke shouldn't be acting weird. He was just doing his job and making sure that they both got home safely. Hell, he probably would have done the same to any one of his fellow officers if they had been drugged like that. So why…why was Sasuke being so strange?

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**Yes, it's not very long. But we can't always have lengthy chapters ;)**

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**So review!**


	7. Oh My Jinchuriki!

**I would like to thank everyone for their wonderful reviews and their support of this story! Sorry that this update took so long to upload. I'm trying to update all my stories so it took quite a bit of time.**

**This chapter although short contains a lot of information, so get ready! Enjoy!**

**p.s: I didn't really have time to edit this chapter so please excuse any mishaps you might find.**

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Chapter 7: Oh My Jinchuriki!

Inside the walls of Jiraiya's study both Kakashi and Yamato poured over documents and books several decades old while Jiraiya thumbed through a stack of files. There was so much information on the nine statues. Myths and legends along with tragic stories of former owners and mysterious deaths followed each Jinchuriki wherever it went. However one story stayed the same. And that one story was causing the hairs on the back of their heads to stand on end.

"It's mentioned here again," Yamato mumbled, holding up a heavy historical volume. Its pages yellowed with age.

Both Kakashi and Jiraiya lowered their own research material and came over to the sandy haired ANBU officer, reading the text over his shoulder. Jiraiya chose to read aloud.

"Legend has it that the head monk of the Hidden Sun Valley concealed a lock of hair in one of the nine stone statues. It is said that the hair once belonged to a man of incredible strength and cunning. He was known as the Sage of Nine Paths and rumor had it that he was not all together human. Demon blood ran through his veins giving him his unrivaled power over his enemies. Many sought to slay him however failed. The head monk only got close enough to hack off a clump of hair. This being his token of the fight he had survived he hid it in one of the nine demon statues in efforts to entrap the demon man's power."

Kakashi sighed, squeezing the bridge of his nose. This had been the tenth account he'd read on the matter of the half demon Sage of Nine Paths. Whether this was what the Akatsuki were after he had no idea.

"I doubt this is it," Jiraiya grumbled as he rubbed his chin. "However I've seen people kill for less. If they indeed believe in this rubbish, I wouldn't put it past them…but what I don't seem to understand is what they would want with that lock of hair if they somehow got their hands on it?"

Yamato nodded. "It doesn't make much sense."

"We need to capture one of the members of the Akatsuki."

Both Yamato and Jiraiya turned to look at the silver haired officer. The man had his brows furrowed deep in thought as he stared at the words written on the page they had just read. It seemed that the only way to find out exactly what the group was after was to coax the information out of them.

"That is all well and good, Kakashi." Yamato said, "But these guys aren't going to just walk into our cuffs. They're smart…and dangerous. Capturing one of them isn't going to just happen like that. We need a carefully constructed plan of offense."

Kakashi nodded, "I know. And I have an idea."

"Oh?" Jiraiya lifted one bushy white eyebrow. "I'm all ears, boy."

Straightening up Kakashi folded his arms across his chest and began. "What we need to do is trap them. They want all the Jinchuriki statues. We need just one. Set it as bait and wait for them to arrive."

"Hm," Jiraiya grunted. "Sure, we could do that."

"But what if they don't need them all?" Yamato countered. "If they are indeed looking for the lock of hair then if they find it in one of their statues our plan would fall through."

"That is why Kankuro is going in from a different angle," Kakashi replied. "We go in through the Jinchuriki side while he continues looking from the victim's view. Anyway it's worth a shot."

The two men nodded, seeing Kakashi's point.

"Well then if that's settled," Kakashi stuck his hands into his pockets and turned. "Let's go tell Tsunade."

At the mention of the Chief's name Jiraiya instantly paled.

"Ah you two go ahead," he insisted, shooing them out towards the door. "I think I'll stay here and research a bit more."

Yamato grinned, fully understanding Jiraiya's plight. "Better come around sooner rather than later. You know how she gets."

"That's why I rather go later. MUCH later," Jiraiya shivered. His fingers tenderly running over his week old bruised posterior. "I _still_ can't sit right."

:::

From behind her desk Tsunade stared at the two faces of her subordinates. Kakashi was leaning lazily against the wall while Yamato stood straight like a board at attention. Heaving an exuberant sigh the Chief of police leaned into her chair and looked up at the ceiling, secretly cursing Jiraiya to hell and back. That man had been avoiding her all week and her fist sorely missed its comforting home buried deep in Jiraiya's belly. Scrunching her nose she flexed her fingers thoughtfully before finally turning her full attention on the two men.

"Well what is it?" She grouched, "Are you just going to stand there all day?"

Yamato colored, shaking his head furiously while Kakashi just sighed and stood straight. Approaching the Chief's desk he bowed before relaying the news.

"We have a theory about the Jinchurikis."

At the sound of that Tsuande's eyes narrowed. Ears now on high alert she nodded her head for the Captain in charge to continue.

"There is a high probability that the Akatsuki are trying to collect all the Jinchuriki statues." Kakashi said. "As to why they are doing so we are not quite sure. However we do suspect that it might have something to do with the legend revolving around those nine statues."

"What legend?" Tsunade asked, brows angling downwards in concentration.

Yamato cleared his throat. "It is said that a lock of hair belonging to the Sage of Nine Paths is concealed within one of the statues. We believe they are trying to obtain it."

Tsunade frowned. "Why?"

"We are not quite sure," Yamato continued. "But whatever the reason, they are adamant at gathering them."

"And how does this tie in with the murders?" Tsunade asked through narrowed eyes, her lips set in a thin line as confusion flowed freely across her face.

"Again," Yamato lowered his head. "We are not quite sure. All we know is that they are willing to kill for these stone statues. Kakashi has come up with an idea on how we can gather more intel."

"Oh?" Tsunade raised an eyebrow, "And what may that be?"

For a single moment Kakashi was startled by how similar Jiraiya and Chief Tsunade were. A shiver ran down his spine at the thought.

"I think we should obtain one of the nine Jinchuriki and set a trap." Kakashi said, "If they are so keen on acquiring all the stone statues, they won't stop to come and collect this one. We capture one of the Akatsuki and extract everything we can from them about the murders and the statues. We don't have anything to lose."

"Hm."

Taking a deep breath Tsunade leaned back in her chair and pondered over the idea. In reality they didn't have much to lose. There was all ready a slew of victims. If she wanted to prevent any more deaths than capturing one of the members of the Akatsuki was top priority. Nodding to herself she looked up.

"Have Gai's team assist you. Include them in your findings," she rubbed her forehead, blonde hair being pushed to the side as she did so. "Give them all the information. We need this to happen fast. Time is something we can't afford to waste."

Kakashi nodded, "Understood."

:::

After coming back from a wonderful meal of three bowls of ramen Naruto grinned and sat back at his desk, stomach full and satiated. Sasuke on the other hand was looking slightly paler than he did before, his mouth slightly open as he sat behind his desk. For the life of him he couldn't comprehend why his eyes would not leave well enough alone. During the whole meal he felt like he was being sucked in by every gesture Naruto made. The blonde's chopsticks were a blur as he shoved the cooked noodles in his mouth hungrily, broth dripping down his chin and falling back down into the bowl.

The hot food made Naruto's pink lips redder and brighter than anything he'd ever seen. Craving and capturing his attention like a work of art. He recalled trying to pull himself away from tempting thoughts. Battling his brain with sheer _will_ alone. If anything was to go by, going out to lunch with Naruto proved to be a huge mistake.

His thoughts only circled around the event of last night _that_ much stronger. Making his memories that more vivid and that more gripping. He swallowed, praying to some unknown deity to let his mind have a rest. He was at work. Mistakes couldn't be performed here!

Five minutes after the boys had gotten back, the door to their shared office space was thrown open and Lee rushed in with a huge grin on his face.

"Naruto!" He bellowed happily, "We've been put on your case! We'll be working together!"

Beside him Naruto heard Sasuke groan. No doubt this was one of the nightmares that played privy in his dreams. Working under the loud and boisterous hand of Might Gai.

"Lee," Neji's voice rung clear through the room.

The pale skinned officer's hair was tied back in a high ponytail while he stood in the entryway with his arms crossed and brows furrowed. It was obvious that Neji wasn't pleased with his partner's rowdy show. Nonetheless the Hyuga walked into the office and approached their desk, his clear lavender eyes resting on Sasuke.

"We're to assemble in Major Yamato's officer immediately." Neji reported, his voice clear and sharp. "My team has been quickly briefed on the situation and we will assist in every way we can."

Sasuke nodded and stood from his seat, pushing his bangs out of his eyes as he did so. From his chair Naruto frowned. How come that whenever they received orders it was Sasuke who received them and he who stood in the background quietly listening. It irked him to no end. Silently fuming he stood from his chair, angrily kneeing the Uchiha in the behind. The usually calm and collected Sasuke nearly jumped. Turning around he stared at Naruto with wide onyx eyes before he caught hold of himself.

Teeth gritting together Sasuke fisted his hands into fists and stealthily kicked the blonde in the shin. The pleasant sound of his surprised cry made the anxious jitters in his body die down. Satisfied Sasuke silently smirked to himself and followed Neji out.

Behind him rubbing an abused shin was Naruto, glaring daggers at his back.

Seems like Sasuke was back to being his usual pricky self. Grinding his teeth Naruto breathed out and straightened his back.

"Have you ever had this uncontrollable desire to choke your partner, Lee?" Naruto asked as they walked down the hall.

Lee cocked his head to the side thoughtfully. "Can't say I have. Though I do suppose it is because Neji and I are close." He grinned. "He's the best! But a rival nonetheless!"

A little further ahead Sasuke and Neji were holding a similar conversation.

"All I ask is for a day of absolute and total silence," Neji growled as he heard Lee's booming voice from behind mentioning another competition he was planning. "One day. Is that too much?"

"Hn," Sasuke replied. "I for one would like to glue the dobe's mouth shut, hang him by his feet and dangle him over a blasted bowl of ramen. See how he would like being tortured and teased at the same time."

Neji cast a sidelong look at his friend, one eyebrow raised. "Really?"

With a determined nod Sasuke replied. "Really."

As they entered Yamato's office each officer took to stand by the wall. It appeared that everyone was already present so Kakashi made himself comfortable leaning on the desk. His eyes roamed over the questioning faces of the younger officers. Each pair of eyes just as curious as the next. Deciding it was better to get to the point he let his shoulders sag.

"As all of you are aware," he began, "We are investigating a double homicide which is proving to be part of a string of murders courtesy of the organization known as the Akatsuki. From what we gathered in our research, our findings have verified that this group is doing everything in their power to obtain all nine Jinchuriki statues. Our plan is to acquire ourselves one of these stone artworks and use it as bait to try and capture at least one of the Akatsuki members. From then on out we will extract as much intel as we can from them and try to put a stop to these murders while at the same time discover what it is they are trying to plan."

Naruto's mind whirled. The image of the stone statue hidden behind the bulletproof glass flashed in his eyes. It was without a doubt one of the Jinchuriki statues that Kakashi was speaking of. He was sure of it after having stared long and hard at an online picture of the stone statue. The flared nine tails, the gaping maw of the demon fox along with the pointed ears and carved muscles. Yeah…he was sure of it.

Kakashi crossed his arms. "The idea is for them to come to us and for that to happen, we need to get a hold of one of these Jinchuriki. I need yo—"

"Kakashi," Naruto interrupted, coming forward.

The seasoned officer stared at his charge, wondering what the boy could possibly say.

Naruto stared determinedly ahead, all childish follies put aside.

"Yes, Naruto?"

"You said we need one of the statues to catch them, right?"

Kakashi nodded.

"I have one."

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**Aaaaaand that's a wrap for chapter seven! Eventful don't you think?**

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**Let me know what you think!**

**-smartcat**


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